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When they are not able to live independently....
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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 419425" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>MWM</p><p></p><p>difficult child might yet surprise you. At 18 Travis was no where near ready to live independently......and we were having many of the same thoughts. I scoped out the area and while there are services, they're all geared toward low IQ and physical issues. Good for those difficult children, bad for Travis as he wouldn't do well in that environment. Across the alley from us is a halfway house of that variety....very nice set up, family run. Since that wasn't an option......and I couldn't afford some other options, such as supervised apartment living......I started talking with family, which of course are his sisters. So at 18 we had a plan in place for IF he could not learn to live independently and something happened to husband and I. </p><p></p><p>At 23, he scared me silly and went off to college where he had to live in the dorm. It was a disability dorm he shared with another disabled student and 2 easy child students who were there to help them. I figured even if the college thing didn't work out, he'd never have another opportunity for such a safety net to attempt living away from home independently. Stepto2 lives near the college and was his emergency contact. He far exceeded all of our expectations, including his own. It wasn't easy as he didn't give himself much budget to work with, but he did it successfully. That experience alone caused him to mature fast in ways he simply could not do while living at home.</p><p></p><p>husband is currently working on his disability so that he can move into his own apartment. Disability will be his safety net as their aren't many places in town he can work given his disabilities. We would never even have considered it possible at 18, 19, 20, or even 21........by 22 he was showing motivation to strike out independently by filling out college forms and loan forms ect. I neither discouraged nor encouraged. I figured by that age if he wanted it bad enough, he'd make it happen.....took him a while but he did it.</p><p></p><p>Even so, easy child will always remain his safety net as well. As his condition is constantly changing.</p><p></p><p>Just knowing there is someone to step up to the plate........is an enormous relief.</p><p></p><p>Hugs</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 419425, member: 84"] MWM difficult child might yet surprise you. At 18 Travis was no where near ready to live independently......and we were having many of the same thoughts. I scoped out the area and while there are services, they're all geared toward low IQ and physical issues. Good for those difficult children, bad for Travis as he wouldn't do well in that environment. Across the alley from us is a halfway house of that variety....very nice set up, family run. Since that wasn't an option......and I couldn't afford some other options, such as supervised apartment living......I started talking with family, which of course are his sisters. So at 18 we had a plan in place for IF he could not learn to live independently and something happened to husband and I. At 23, he scared me silly and went off to college where he had to live in the dorm. It was a disability dorm he shared with another disabled student and 2 easy child students who were there to help them. I figured even if the college thing didn't work out, he'd never have another opportunity for such a safety net to attempt living away from home independently. Stepto2 lives near the college and was his emergency contact. He far exceeded all of our expectations, including his own. It wasn't easy as he didn't give himself much budget to work with, but he did it successfully. That experience alone caused him to mature fast in ways he simply could not do while living at home. husband is currently working on his disability so that he can move into his own apartment. Disability will be his safety net as their aren't many places in town he can work given his disabilities. We would never even have considered it possible at 18, 19, 20, or even 21........by 22 he was showing motivation to strike out independently by filling out college forms and loan forms ect. I neither discouraged nor encouraged. I figured by that age if he wanted it bad enough, he'd make it happen.....took him a while but he did it. Even so, easy child will always remain his safety net as well. As his condition is constantly changing. Just knowing there is someone to step up to the plate........is an enormous relief. Hugs [/QUOTE]
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