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when to push, when to leave it alone?
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 392560" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>If after all that work she doesn't get picked, work with her to show her how it still was not a waste. It was good practice for a later opportunity and who knows? Maybe the later opportunity will be a better one anyway. Also I would work with her on how adults are NOT perfect and don't always make choices based on who is best. Sometimes it has to be - who will be the stayers? What sort of team do I pick, that will work together smoothly and easily with no hassles? With more time, a bit more maturity and more experience, this will stand her in good stead.</p><p> </p><p>And maybe she will be more likely to be considered next time? She had a go, she tried, and that in most people's eyes is what really counts. How she handles rejection is going to be important too. It is all a useful lesson and a positive experience, even if it is not what she wanted or expected.</p><p></p><p>We went through this with easy child 2/difficult child 2 in early 2000 - try-outs for the Sydney 2000 Olympics Opening Ceremony. She broke her wrist when trying out for one of the stiltwalkers (she was borderline too young anyway) and as a consolation prize, because of her extensive dancing/singing/performing experience, they said, "We have another opportunity for you, we are looking for one special little girl but it is very top secret." Thus easy child 2/difficult child 2 was in the final 20 for the choice of the "Hero Girl", a role that eventually went to a cute, blonde, curly-haired moppet called Nikki Webster. Nikki did a great job and frankly, had a CV miles better than easy child 2/difficult child 2's. Plus she didn't have a broken wrist at the audition - when we saw what she had to do, there is no way our girl would have been ready to rehearse on that wrist. But for months easy child 2/difficult child 2 would snipe about "flamin' Nikki Webster," until we saw the rest of Australia's popular media beginning to bag out the kid too (it happen when you get too well-known too fast sometimes). Then she began to see that she (easy child 2/difficult child 2) had not had the maturity to handle the role, nor the maturity to handle the fame that would have come with it. She learned to not resent those who succeed when she has not. Good grace in this process is most important, to breed a better chance of success in the future. </p><p></p><p>Feel free to share this story with your difficult child - she was 13 years old when this happened. Nikki Webster was 12, but had been performing professionally on stage from the age of 5. easy child 2/difficult child 2 finally realised that missing out on a role to Nikki Webster was no shame in any way.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 392560, member: 1991"] If after all that work she doesn't get picked, work with her to show her how it still was not a waste. It was good practice for a later opportunity and who knows? Maybe the later opportunity will be a better one anyway. Also I would work with her on how adults are NOT perfect and don't always make choices based on who is best. Sometimes it has to be - who will be the stayers? What sort of team do I pick, that will work together smoothly and easily with no hassles? With more time, a bit more maturity and more experience, this will stand her in good stead. And maybe she will be more likely to be considered next time? She had a go, she tried, and that in most people's eyes is what really counts. How she handles rejection is going to be important too. It is all a useful lesson and a positive experience, even if it is not what she wanted or expected. We went through this with easy child 2/difficult child 2 in early 2000 - try-outs for the Sydney 2000 Olympics Opening Ceremony. She broke her wrist when trying out for one of the stiltwalkers (she was borderline too young anyway) and as a consolation prize, because of her extensive dancing/singing/performing experience, they said, "We have another opportunity for you, we are looking for one special little girl but it is very top secret." Thus easy child 2/difficult child 2 was in the final 20 for the choice of the "Hero Girl", a role that eventually went to a cute, blonde, curly-haired moppet called Nikki Webster. Nikki did a great job and frankly, had a CV miles better than easy child 2/difficult child 2's. Plus she didn't have a broken wrist at the audition - when we saw what she had to do, there is no way our girl would have been ready to rehearse on that wrist. But for months easy child 2/difficult child 2 would snipe about "flamin' Nikki Webster," until we saw the rest of Australia's popular media beginning to bag out the kid too (it happen when you get too well-known too fast sometimes). Then she began to see that she (easy child 2/difficult child 2) had not had the maturity to handle the role, nor the maturity to handle the fame that would have come with it. She learned to not resent those who succeed when she has not. Good grace in this process is most important, to breed a better chance of success in the future. Feel free to share this story with your difficult child - she was 13 years old when this happened. Nikki Webster was 12, but had been performing professionally on stage from the age of 5. easy child 2/difficult child 2 finally realised that missing out on a role to Nikki Webster was no shame in any way. Marg [/QUOTE]
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