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when to tell him we are going to see someone
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<blockquote data-quote="keista" data-source="post: 433696" data-attributes="member: 11965"><p>Sounds like that chat went pretty well. Maybe have one every day until the appointment, and <u>please</u>, for your son's sake, explain the "unscramble the brain" thing to him. It's an idiom, a figure of speech, not your brain for real, but how you think.</p><p></p><p>It's been haunting me to the point I asked my 15 y/o son what he would think if I told him I was taking him to see someone who could help "unscramble his brain" Son said, "Ah, I'd be concerned." then stared blankly and finally asked why I was asking. I asked why he'd be concerned and he said that it sounded like I was thinking surgery and although he has his problems, he doesn't want anyone messing with his brain. Yes, my son is an Aspie, but he's quite good with language and idioms and recognizing puns and sarcasm and such, and he's 15.</p><p></p><p>Here's a non-Aspie ex. DD1 tans beautifully. I always fawned over that fact to her from a young age. First day in the sun and she's a nice deep tan, and that's with SPF30. When she was 6, unbeknownst to me, mother in law complimented her tan, but instead of saying tan used the word brown. Suddenly, DD1 did NOT want to go swimming, she REFUSED to go to the park. Insisted on getting sprayed 3x with the sunscreen. Spent hours in the tub scrubbing herself. She wanted her skin to be white. I got everyone that she admired to reinforce the fact that her tan was BEAUTIFUL. She just did not want it anymore. After days of this and hours of her crying over her skin color, and hours of talking to her and assuring her, I finally got it out of her that she did not want to be brown like some of the kids at school. (this isn't a race thing, so let's please not go there) WTH? Then I got it out of her that that was what mother in law called her - brown Even though I explained what mother in law meant, she wasn't believing me, so I had mother in law explain to her that by brown she meant the same thing as tan. After that, no problems. In fact I think it was her 'darkest' summer ever. Point is, kids get these crazy notions in their heads, and especially emotionally sensitive kids will have a hard time getting those crazy notions out of their heads without some serious guidance.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="keista, post: 433696, member: 11965"] Sounds like that chat went pretty well. Maybe have one every day until the appointment, and [U]please[/U], for your son's sake, explain the "unscramble the brain" thing to him. It's an idiom, a figure of speech, not your brain for real, but how you think. It's been haunting me to the point I asked my 15 y/o son what he would think if I told him I was taking him to see someone who could help "unscramble his brain" Son said, "Ah, I'd be concerned." then stared blankly and finally asked why I was asking. I asked why he'd be concerned and he said that it sounded like I was thinking surgery and although he has his problems, he doesn't want anyone messing with his brain. Yes, my son is an Aspie, but he's quite good with language and idioms and recognizing puns and sarcasm and such, and he's 15. Here's a non-Aspie ex. DD1 tans beautifully. I always fawned over that fact to her from a young age. First day in the sun and she's a nice deep tan, and that's with SPF30. When she was 6, unbeknownst to me, mother in law complimented her tan, but instead of saying tan used the word brown. Suddenly, DD1 did NOT want to go swimming, she REFUSED to go to the park. Insisted on getting sprayed 3x with the sunscreen. Spent hours in the tub scrubbing herself. She wanted her skin to be white. I got everyone that she admired to reinforce the fact that her tan was BEAUTIFUL. She just did not want it anymore. After days of this and hours of her crying over her skin color, and hours of talking to her and assuring her, I finally got it out of her that she did not want to be brown like some of the kids at school. (this isn't a race thing, so let's please not go there) WTH? Then I got it out of her that that was what mother in law called her - brown Even though I explained what mother in law meant, she wasn't believing me, so I had mother in law explain to her that by brown she meant the same thing as tan. After that, no problems. In fact I think it was her 'darkest' summer ever. Point is, kids get these crazy notions in their heads, and especially emotionally sensitive kids will have a hard time getting those crazy notions out of their heads without some serious guidance. [/QUOTE]
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