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Family of Origin
When your past as a child, follows you as a mother, as a person.
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 670397" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>My sister stayed. And at 60 when my mother died, she was so bitter and angry she would not speak or see my mother for almost the last year of her life. Nor would she assist in any medical decision or take any responsibility at all. And except for one time would not speak to me as I took responsibility.</p><p></p><p>I feel bad too about medical decisions I made. There is no easy or pretty way to die, unless maybe you take pills. The big decision was when it was determined that my mother could no longer safely eat. She was in the hospital. A lot of pressure was put on me to let her die by starving. At that point she was not dying of anything. So, M and I believed strongly that it would be killing my mother to withhold food. I believed that she could recuperate somewhat and no doctor could or would tell me that she would not. Still, many people would have allowed my mother to starve. Except they would put it, to allow her to die. I know my sister would have. My mother never did after that have any real quality of life. It was out of the hospital for less than a week, and back in. But during that time we had the talk about love. We had a young Rabbinical student visit. And she laughed and smiled at my jokes.</p><p></p><p>But there was more suffering too. But I had asked her, Mama, do you want to die? And she said No. Well, that is all she wrote. I had to obey my mother.</p><p></p><p>Any chance I can, I do too. So did my Mother. Except LA was so built up when she lived there there were only town homes. So she looked at those. Or we would go out with a realtor and see resales. But she never moved.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Not too long before her death, she was in the hospital for yet another time. I asked her, Mama, do you love me. <em>Oh, so much. I love you so much</em>. I asked her, Mama, do you know how much I love you? She answered yes. I said, Mama, do you really, really know, how much? And she waited nearly 30 seconds. And said. Yes.</p><p></p><p>Cedar has read this, maybe, 36 times. It means so much to me.</p><p></p><p>Thank you Feeling.</p><p></p><p>COPA</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 670397, member: 18958"] My sister stayed. And at 60 when my mother died, she was so bitter and angry she would not speak or see my mother for almost the last year of her life. Nor would she assist in any medical decision or take any responsibility at all. And except for one time would not speak to me as I took responsibility. I feel bad too about medical decisions I made. There is no easy or pretty way to die, unless maybe you take pills. The big decision was when it was determined that my mother could no longer safely eat. She was in the hospital. A lot of pressure was put on me to let her die by starving. At that point she was not dying of anything. So, M and I believed strongly that it would be killing my mother to withhold food. I believed that she could recuperate somewhat and no doctor could or would tell me that she would not. Still, many people would have allowed my mother to starve. Except they would put it, to allow her to die. I know my sister would have. My mother never did after that have any real quality of life. It was out of the hospital for less than a week, and back in. But during that time we had the talk about love. We had a young Rabbinical student visit. And she laughed and smiled at my jokes. But there was more suffering too. But I had asked her, Mama, do you want to die? And she said No. Well, that is all she wrote. I had to obey my mother. Any chance I can, I do too. So did my Mother. Except LA was so built up when she lived there there were only town homes. So she looked at those. Or we would go out with a realtor and see resales. But she never moved. Not too long before her death, she was in the hospital for yet another time. I asked her, Mama, do you love me. [I]Oh, so much. I love you so much[/I]. I asked her, Mama, do you know how much I love you? She answered yes. I said, Mama, do you really, really know, how much? And she waited nearly 30 seconds. And said. Yes. Cedar has read this, maybe, 36 times. It means so much to me. Thank you Feeling. COPA [/QUOTE]
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Family of Origin
When your past as a child, follows you as a mother, as a person.
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