Where do I start?

[donna723]

Deb, nothing will ever change the way we feel about you or the love and respect we have for you. I know you haven't been happy for a very long time. Stress can take a horrible toll on people and everyone has their limits of how much they can take without breaking. This could have been any of us at different times in our lives, hon. I think you are very courageous to face this head-on and make plans. I seriously doubt too that you will do more than a token amount of time. But you can use this time to your advantage. Look at it as a way of getting away from all your stressors, a time to rest, decompress, re-center yourself and get some real help. When you get out, it can be the beginning of a whole new life for you. And you can be making notes! Think of it as material for another book!

Maybe you can still communicate with us - is there any way that you could send letters to one of us and we can post it here for you? I will keep you in my thoughts and my prayers that things will be looking up for you when all of this is finally over. You are very much loved and valued here, Deb.

 

[klmno]

It's a darn shame that if I end up in jail, too, I can't be sent where you are so we can keep each other company!!

 

[Abbey]

Thank you all so much. I'll post more info when I know. I think what I am most scared of is when they put me in jail last time I was not let out of the holding cell for a week. Not to be racist, but they said I was the only white girl in there and they didn't want to release me to the regular cells...there might be problems. Great, just great. A holding cell is 6 X 10 ALL concrete. No windows, no nothing. No books...NOTHING. I went stir crazy about day 3. The only person I saw was the one who shoved my food through a small window 3 times a day.

I'm sure my daughter will keep you all informed.

Much love...Abbey

 

[Estherfromjerusalem]

Very dear Abbey Deb,

I have nothing original to add to everything that's been said. I am another of those to whom you are the strong heroine who helped to save my sanity when I thought I wouldn't be able to carry on, all those years ago (it must be about 12 or 13 years, or maybe more, I'm not sure). I admire you immensely for just your being you, and I pray that you get through your "time" safely and look forward to hearing that you are out again. If your address can be made available, I will write.

With love and hugs -- Esther

 

[Abbey]

What really annoys me is I can't take my sporks!!! And, if you'll look at my location by my avatar it's in the corner next to Star. Starbie...I hate to break the news but you're going to jail with me and any other of you guys that are in the corner. Ha!!

 

[flutterby]

(((hugs)))

 

[Suz]

Deb, we've known each other for a very long time. We've gone through a lot together and stayed in touch throughout and even had the pleasure of meeting face to face. It's taken a lot of courage for you to go through the last few years and it took a lot of courage to be honest here. I am proud to call you my friend.

Love,
Suz

 

[mstang67chic]

If you can, let someone know the address to send you mail and maybe even how to do commissary. AT least if we put in a couple of bucks, you'll have money for stamps, paper and envelopes.

 

[TerryJ2]

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, I am so sorry! I will miss you!
I hope you can come back and read these responses. We'll be thinking of you, and expecting you to sign on again when your time is finished.

 

[totoro]

Well Abbs you made me burn my cookies! Just sitting here thinking about you. But you are so worth a batch of burnt cookies. Much more. husband asked why I was sad and I briefly told him, he said well she is in good company.
He has had a history of doing "things", The punching of the cop a couple of years ago when he tried to help him out of a cab was good times.
But like you he is so worth it and deep down such a good person.
He was looking and searching for himself and something.
Pain is a tough thing to cover up and to heal.
This board is full of a lot of us with many difficult child personalities and many of us are full blown G'sFG. I know I am. I could never preach...

Please take care of yourself and if you will, let us know if we may send you a letter or something.

 

[Abbey]

Again, thanks so much for the support.

Sorry, Toto for the burnt cookies.

As soon as I know where the heck to start with the process I'll update. I believe my daughter has an account on here. (She's spying on me.) I will tell her to post.

Right now my neighbors are being very cooperative in letting me snag the internet. Naughty me. They're probably thinking...why is the internet so slow???

On a positive side I spent most the day swimming in a luscious pool in the coolest day we've had since I got here. Only 105. I walked about 2 miles the other day trying to find a job in 115 heat. I thought I was going to have a flipping heart attack. Imagine me asking for an application while I'm dripping sweat from every body part. Yeah...I want to hire her!

I'm tanned like an Indian just floating on cool water. I guess if nothing else, I had a wonderful vacation. Other than that, life is good right now. Trust me...5 guys LOVE to have a woman come around and cook and clean. I'm not paying any rent so I try to find things to do to help out. They don't seem to mind.

Love you all.

Abbers

 

[KTMom91]

Sending hugs and lots of love.

 

[ML]

If anything, I think even more of you. You are facing your mistakes with courage and I'm really proud of you. You are a genuine, loving and kind person. I hope you come out with a new lease on life. If there is anything I can do, let me know. Hugs and lots of love.

 

[barneysmom]

You don't know me but I've been reading here for a long time. You are a hero to me.

Some of my own experiences that I had thought would be unbearable, horrible, terrifying, have turned out to be transformative for me. Also, those things just had to happen to me if I was to achieve any sense of balance whatsoever.

It's OK, and you'll be OK. Deb don't get caught up in loaded words like "jail" and "incarcerated." You're still just you, trying to get through as best you can. Keep your eyes peeled for what this part of the journey has to offer, because you will surely see it. And it won't be anything about you being a bad person. Be sure to take a journal along and keep a record of this time. You don't want to miss anything about yourself, little details that can be clues to the big stuff. Plus I'll bet you'll meet some interesting women like yourself.

just speaking from my own previous scary experiences.

 

[BusynMember]

I don't check the Watercooler enough.
Good god, I don't think less of you! Who are ANY of us to judge? We're here only to give support and love. And you have both from me. (((Hugs)))

 

[Lothlorien]

I'm sorry Abby. I hope that you will come out of this with a new outlook on life and sober. You are a wonderfully strong woman. You will get through this and we will all be keeping you in our prayers. Make sure your daughter checks in with us. We will be worried for you.

 

[nvts]

Abby! You know that we all live for excitement! This will make a good book soon - make sure you keep track and all of us up to date. Let your daughter know she can pm any of us - we're here for her too you know!

Most would bake a cake with a file in it, I'm baking mine to send you with a spork!

Seriously, I'm proud of you - no lip service from you - you decided to confront you situations with dignity - I couldn't be prouder to call you a friend!

Beth

 

[Jena]

oh abbey my friend who pees with-her cell phone...........how i miss your posts and wisdom you certainly deny you have. oh sweetie we're all a mess, being a mess is real, as real as it gets. you didn't cover up that is your personality shining through and that lighthearted way you have!! i hope i'm in time to talk to you before you gooo!!!

 

[Nancy]

Deb,

Tomorrow we bring our difficult child to a treatment facility for alcohol abuse. We told her this could be the start of a new life or the continuation of a bad one, her choice. It is for you too.

I'm with Fran. The Deb I knew years ago when I was in a very dark place helped save my sanity. She was a strong woman who had compassion for those of us who had nowhere else to turn. I refuse to believe that woman is not inside you waiting to get back on track.

As I leave my difficult child tomorrow with hope for a better tomorrow, I will say a prayer for you too so that both of you can start over and find your way back. I have a great deal of respect and confidence in you.

Hugs,
Nancy

 

[Wiped Out]

Sorry I'm coming in to this so late-just saw it-must need my eyes checked!

As with the others, no way do I think less of you. Are you allowed visitors? Depending what city you are in I could bring in the mail! Hugs!