Where do you go for fun/relaxation?

[klmno]

What kind of place do women (with or without a date) who are around 50yo hang out or go to socialize and just get out of the house? I'm way too old for the noisy bars, 20some year olds partying and don't have the body or energy to act younger, but I feel like other couples around here are going out doing something. I just don't know what or where and I don't know them well enough to ask. I like going out to dinner or drinks but don't like going by myself unless it's a place where other single people go. Pitiful, I know. LOL!

 

[Andy]

If you have a hobby, look for an organization or group to fill the hobby such as Scrapbooking - attend all day workshops (true, you mostly stay to yourself, but you still can mingle a little and get to know regular scrappers) - Look into a local craft store for scrapping or other craft workshops - Google Scrapbooking to find businesses like Creative Memories where consultants hold workshops.

Do you like to read? Check with the local library to find a reading club to join.

How about checking the local Community Education for a night class to take on something you are interested in?

If you like to garden, check out a Master Gardener's club. There are clubs for so many things, even photography.

If you like to sing, maybe check with the local theator, college, your church ect. to join a choir.

Do you like acting? The local theator may have open auditions for a play - there is so much down time between practicing individual/group parts that you would have lots of time to meet and visit new friends.

If you belong to a church, join one of their bible studies or ladies aid groups.

There are service organizations such as Habitat for Humanity, Hospice, ect. that you can inquire of helping with projects.

 

[DammitJanet]

I would love to know the answer to that one too. I go out to dinner alone sometimes but I end up taking a book to read by myself. Sometimes I go to the park and read. I have heard people go to the library or to a borders bookstore but we dont have one.

Do you have anything like a museum or maybe a community college nearby that you could take continuing ed classes at in something like pottery or cooking or car repair where you might meet someone as a friend. Usually those classes are really cheap and held at night so working folks can take them. Or even call the rec dept and ask about some sort of activity through them. Maybe they need help with teams or maybe they have adult leagues you could join like softball or bowling.

 

[muttmeister]

I go to the library. Our church has a dinner every Wednesday night; it was originally meant to feed the poor but now almost everybody in town goes. It is a free will offering so if you're poor you can eat free and if you're rich you can kick in $50 or whatever. And we have a local winery which has a book club once a month that I joined and also they have a ladies' night out about once a month and it is always fun. And if all else fails, I can stop at the bowling alley and have a beer; I know all of the people who go there and they know I'm not looking for a mate and if I were I wouldn't be interested in them anyway so I can just be "one of the guys" there.

 

[goldenguru]

I used to belong (before I was working full time) to a book club at our local library. They had selected books, which we all read, and then came together to talk about (and eat lots of good junk food).

I used to volunteer quite a bit. Did meals on wheels for seniors for a long time.

Church is a great place to meet people. Our Sunday school classes are actually based on life stages.

Lots of community centers have card nights, and special field trips for us 'older' folks. Check out your community center.

And of course, you can always entertain. Invite some folks over for a game night, or a bonfire and see what you can drum up in the friendship department.

You have to be proactive in meeting people. They don't come knocking on your door.

Best of luck.

 

[klmno]

Great ideas! Thanks! I love the bookstore but hadn't thought about it because I always end up buying a bunch of books and I'm poor lately. LOL! Maybe I can try going and being determined NOT to buy anything!

 

[Lothlorien]

What about having a Bunco night or Steal/Trade Bingo with your friends? With Bunco, it's with 12 people, so each of the twelve people could volunteer to have Bunco at their house. If you do it once a month, you only volunteer to have it at your house once a year.

 

[Fran]

It seems to me that not having the mind set of finding someone helps.
You go out to find your own interests and you will meet people.
If you like books, then a regular visit to the bookstore.
Volunteer somewhere if it is in your comfort zone.
YMCA to walk on the treadmill or exercise.
If that doesn't work, go to the local bike/walking trail where there is a lot of activity and just take a walk.

I think if you do your activities on a scheduled day you will run into the same people and eventually feel like you can have a conversation.

The idea of forced socialization is so crazy on so many levels. I have no idea why as young adults we did that instead of finding interests. Hanging out in a bar thinking we would meet Mr. Right? Um, I don't think so. I also, think internet matching sites is a good way to go. At least you know that they are interested in meeting people. Not that you will end up with Mr. Right but it's a toe into the dating world.

Being curious about people seems to be a good ice breaker. Everyone perks up when someone asks questions about them. Ask questions, be interested.
I think that's what I would do if I were single. Working on meeting with people of similar interests and developing a friendship. Maybe sparks fly eventually but at least it's a more honest interaction than the "show" when out at bars.

 

[ML]

Fran makes an excellent point that I will ponder. Forced socialization. Yes, why do we do that? I guess it's because some of our kids don't want to socialize but maybe they have the right idea.

Follow interests is brilliant. What do you like to do? I have recently discovered I love bicycling. I took it up to accompany manster on his forced exercise routine (ok to force lol) and I just love it.

by the way you're closer to 40 woman! ha Love, ML

 

[klmno]

I WISH I was closer to 40 but I'm pretty darn close to the next decade. LOL!

 

[Fran]

Seems like a good time to do all those things you have put on the back burner.
I took horseback riding lessons one year. I tried something new every year just for the heck of it for a while.

 

[susiestar]

Volunteer somewhere. husband needed a community service project to round out his resume so he voluteered to be the computer help desk at the library. Not only did he meet a LOT of people, he also met the people who work in the library. For us, that was a great thing as we are serious book junkeis (the only time we use crack is when we are opening a new book with a tight cover!) His one night a week was the only time they had anyone to help with more than logging in so he met hordes of people who wanted to do something but cannot figure out how to do it.

You could find a community art show or other community event to volunteer at. If you go to a local bookstore you can often see posters for upcoming events in the store or the community. Just jot down the info and call to ask if they need help.

Or find a place to learn something new, like rock climbing, cake decorating, knitting, glass blowing, bead making, jewelry making, pottery, etc....

 

[DammitJanet]

There are so many good ideas on here that I am going to try some. I am feeling a bit better now and since Billy has his license now (yay) I have time now to do my own thing! I am not tied to being home at certain times.

I am tied to a small town that doesnt have everything everyone has suggested but I can look around and see what we do have!

 

[DammitJanet]

OOO...I just thought of something! I think I will go ask Keyana's new Head Start program if they need volunteers to help read to the kids one day a week or something like that!

Then maybe I will go to where I get my therapy and talk to them about getting a group started for parents with kids with mental health issues. I would be excellent at that!

 

[compassion]

I am going to "diva night" (women only) at DO ART, it is a place you make ceramic stuff. They have free muisc and food.
I love to travel.
I like to hang out and have a meal at a place where you can talk with others.
Farmers markets around here you can eaisly meet pepoe. Around here, there is a store where I almost alasy meet people I know.
For me, I hav eto balance out how much I do. In th epast, I have beeninvolved in drumming circles.
I go to twerlve step meetings. I go to a chuch that has a bresskst afterwards and they hadve a lot of Sunday School classes but I have to be careful I do not burn myself out.
I love to read.
I love to swim. I used otmeet a lot of peopel at the local spsrings. I have also enjoyed goign to art show openings, museum sopenings, book clubs.
Compassion

 

[susiestar]

Janet, those are AWESOME ideas! I know our Head Start tries to get every family to donate or volunteer at least once. $$ is not required, and donations can be snacks, wipes, hand gel, anything they can afford.

You could also donate time at the food pantry. Or at a Thrift Shop. If you have small private schools they also need volunteers.

This IS a great list. I think some of these would be great for Jess and I also! Not that she needs to meet adults, but she loves to volunteer.