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<blockquote data-quote="aiju" data-source="post: 189437" data-attributes="member: 5796"><p>Yes, but near only a smallish city.</p><p></p><p>I agree, she isn't a "jerk", it just feels that way to me sometimes! We went to a couple of family therapists, but have not found them to be particularly helpful. They did / do (we are still seeing one of them) give me pretty strange looks sometimes when I describe her behavior. </p><p></p><p>What's an MDE? How do I go about getting her evaluated? Would I just call someone at the county school that she would attend, or is there some particular person I'd want to find to talk to. Are there any "magic words" I need to use to get them to help?</p><p></p><p></p><p> Oh boy, I was adopted as an infant, but I do know my birth parents. Mom has substance abuse issues (on methadone for prior heroin addiction, alcoholic), dad definitely has psychiatric issues - my mom said he had been diagnosed with schizophrenia, but I suspect it is something more like Aspergers as he is extremely bright but quite odd and not quite socially with it. Both have ADHD, as does my half brother.</p><p></p><p>As for daughter, she is extremely bright. She spoke extremely early - complete sentences well before she was 2, and even now she speaks more like an adult than a kid her age. She actually seems to prefer adult company to most other kids. It is hard though, because we have become so isolated. Other parents don't really want to have their kids around her, so we never get invited to playdates anymore. Its really a drag because that means I don't have any mom friends either. Things will start off well when we meet people, but they inevitably go downhill until we stop getting called anymore, and people eventually become "too busy" to do things with us.</p><p></p><p>Motor skills developed pretty much normally, but we noticed very early on that she wasn't like other kids. She would be strangely aggressive to other kids by the time she was 2, or maybe a bit before that - pretty much when we started taking her to activities once the "colic" started to wear off.</p><p></p><p>She has never been particularly cuddly. She's more likely to jump on your head to try to "play". She can and does make eye contact, but it does seem to make her uncomfortable at times. She is also not very good at dealing with positive feedback. Sometimes she gets mad and will tell you to "stop saying that" when you are pointing out something helpful that she did. She has never been good at playing by herself, although that is slowly starting to get better at it, meaning that she may play for 10 minutes on her own on occasion.</p></blockquote><p></p><p> Thanks for the advice. Is there such a thing as a pediatric neuropsychologist? I did a web search and found a neuropsychologist practice in our town, but they don't say anything about kids. </p><p></p><p>I'm feeling a bit bummed out tonight. I had a meeting with her preschool teacher and the president of the board of the preschool. Basically she is on a 30 day probation period, unless something serious happens before the 30 days is up. She starts back next week, and I am really stressed about it. I got questions like "so, are you <em>consistent </em>with her discipline?" and a comment that "when she doesn't want to go to the 'safe place' after an incident, what am I supposed to do because I am not willing to be assaulted. I have seen her beat up on you".</p><p></p><p>Heck, don't they think it has dawned on us to be consistent with her discipline for heaven's sake? My husband and I both have advanced degrees and are pretty intelligent people. Nobody understands how thouroughly exhausting it is to have a kid like this. Yeah, sometimes I'm not consistent because I just cant take it anymore and have to just walk away. But I know we work at it harder than the vast majority of parents out there. Oh boy, sorry for the rant, and thanks for listening!! I know there must be some reason that this challenging little person has come into our lives, so I also try to learn as much from her as I can. </p><p></p><p>Oh, and thanks for the reference to the Explosive Child. I have read it and am working my way through the "Treating Explosive Kids" book.</p><p>[/QUOTE]</p>
[QUOTE="aiju, post: 189437, member: 5796"] Yes, but near only a smallish city. I agree, she isn't a "jerk", it just feels that way to me sometimes! We went to a couple of family therapists, but have not found them to be particularly helpful. They did / do (we are still seeing one of them) give me pretty strange looks sometimes when I describe her behavior. What's an MDE? How do I go about getting her evaluated? Would I just call someone at the county school that she would attend, or is there some particular person I'd want to find to talk to. Are there any "magic words" I need to use to get them to help? Oh boy, I was adopted as an infant, but I do know my birth parents. Mom has substance abuse issues (on methadone for prior heroin addiction, alcoholic), dad definitely has psychiatric issues - my mom said he had been diagnosed with schizophrenia, but I suspect it is something more like Aspergers as he is extremely bright but quite odd and not quite socially with it. Both have ADHD, as does my half brother. As for daughter, she is extremely bright. She spoke extremely early - complete sentences well before she was 2, and even now she speaks more like an adult than a kid her age. She actually seems to prefer adult company to most other kids. It is hard though, because we have become so isolated. Other parents don't really want to have their kids around her, so we never get invited to playdates anymore. Its really a drag because that means I don't have any mom friends either. Things will start off well when we meet people, but they inevitably go downhill until we stop getting called anymore, and people eventually become "too busy" to do things with us. Motor skills developed pretty much normally, but we noticed very early on that she wasn't like other kids. She would be strangely aggressive to other kids by the time she was 2, or maybe a bit before that - pretty much when we started taking her to activities once the "colic" started to wear off. She has never been particularly cuddly. She's more likely to jump on your head to try to "play". She can and does make eye contact, but it does seem to make her uncomfortable at times. She is also not very good at dealing with positive feedback. Sometimes she gets mad and will tell you to "stop saying that" when you are pointing out something helpful that she did. She has never been good at playing by herself, although that is slowly starting to get better at it, meaning that she may play for 10 minutes on her own on occasion. [/quote] Thanks for the advice. Is there such a thing as a pediatric neuropsychologist? I did a web search and found a neuropsychologist practice in our town, but they don't say anything about kids. I'm feeling a bit bummed out tonight. I had a meeting with her preschool teacher and the president of the board of the preschool. Basically she is on a 30 day probation period, unless something serious happens before the 30 days is up. She starts back next week, and I am really stressed about it. I got questions like "so, are you [I]consistent [/I]with her discipline?" and a comment that "when she doesn't want to go to the 'safe place' after an incident, what am I supposed to do because I am not willing to be assaulted. I have seen her beat up on you". Heck, don't they think it has dawned on us to be consistent with her discipline for heaven's sake? My husband and I both have advanced degrees and are pretty intelligent people. Nobody understands how thouroughly exhausting it is to have a kid like this. Yeah, sometimes I'm not consistent because I just cant take it anymore and have to just walk away. But I know we work at it harder than the vast majority of parents out there. Oh boy, sorry for the rant, and thanks for listening!! I know there must be some reason that this challenging little person has come into our lives, so I also try to learn as much from her as I can. Oh, and thanks for the reference to the Explosive Child. I have read it and am working my way through the "Treating Explosive Kids" book. [/QUOTE]
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