I just need to get this out. You don't need to read or respond. I'm just having a pity party for one - unless others want to join. You know..misery loves company and all that.... I feel like I've been hit by a truck and it backed up and rolled over me again. I'm so exhausted that I'm nauseous. But that doesn't always equal tired or sleepy. Joy. I have an appointment Wed for more steroid shots. Yippee! 25 pounds lost will soon be found again. Going to need both shoulders done and either SI joints or hips - wherever the pain in that area is coming from. When I do sleep, I wake up a dozen times a night because of the pain. I have an IEP meeting Thursday that needs *a lot* of changes now that difficult child is in high school and I am just mentally not there. I am losing my words left and right and sound like a bumbling idiot. Today it seems to be words that start with "E"; we'll see what it is tomorrow. Just for laughs and all. I'm taking easy child with me and requested that difficult child be present as well. I can't push back the meeting because her IEP expires the 18th. They offered to hold one without me then do it over when I could come in and we could change everything, but I asked them how they could possibly do that when they nothing about difficult child and all of the private testing information that I gave to the school is not in her sped file? After my previous experiences with elementary and middle school, I'm just not going to do that. I don't think the high school is going to be the same way, but better safe than sorry, right? So, I have to somehow pull it together enough to completely redo her IEP from a home based education to traditional school education. And her IEP is up for reevaluation. So excited. Can't ya tell? difficult child 2's therapist (who is also difficult child's therapist) told me that it will probably take jail for difficult child 2 to "get it". I agreed and told her that I don't think a 6 month stint will do it either. I think it will take hard time and even then it's iffy. (by the way, she has permission to talk to me about difficult child 2. She knows I'm part of his support team.) So, even though I knew that, hearing it from a professional who is an optimist was very disheartening. Good news! easy child got the job! He will be working at the Kroger Distribution Center that is here in town. Decent pay for his age and skill level and benefits - his insurance runs out when he turns 19. He'll top out hourly wage in 30 months, so steady raises, and they said he'll get as much overtime as he wants. Thank you for the bead rattling! And as much as it stunk that he was unemployed, it was really the right time for him to be. I have been very dependent on him to get me to appointments and run errands. He hasn't complained a bit. Ok. I think that's all for now. I just needed to get that out. Been kinda going in and out of depression for the last few days. Seems to be par for the course when I flare. Thank you for listening.