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White Knuckling It..
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<blockquote data-quote="TerryJ2" data-source="post: 102984" data-attributes="member: 3419"><p>Gosh, what a mess.</p><p>So sorry.</p><p>I would sit down with-husband, calmly, and tell him he has no choice. He cannot sit and watch TV while you have a meltdown. He can watch TV for 1/2 hr a day, to relax, and then do chores or whatever else he is expected to do, just like any other member of the household. If you tell him he can't watch TV at all it will be too antagonistic, and besides, he does need to chill, just as every one does.</p><p>Instead of saying something vague, like, "You've got to help me," be specific, and say, "I will be going to the store (for a walk, whatever) from 7-8:30 on Tues. and you will be here to take care of the kids. I really appreciate your help, honey."</p><p>Give him a kiss on the cheek or pat him on the shoulder (it helps to "cement a contract" of sorts if you have physical contact--it will get his attention, too, since he's ADD) and make sure you make statements rather than asking questions.</p><p>I've learned THAT the hard way! :smile:</p><p>I do not think that putting your difficult child in school means you are a failure. It simply means that you are outsourcing, using resources wisely.</p><p>Just reframe your thinking, and it will be a huge load off of your shoulders.</p><p>As for the medications, I can't help you there ... it sounds like the docs have a completely diff mindset than you do. Does your difficult child zone out after ea episode? What do you do afterward?</p><p></p><p>{Hugs}</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TerryJ2, post: 102984, member: 3419"] Gosh, what a mess. So sorry. I would sit down with-husband, calmly, and tell him he has no choice. He cannot sit and watch TV while you have a meltdown. He can watch TV for 1/2 hr a day, to relax, and then do chores or whatever else he is expected to do, just like any other member of the household. If you tell him he can't watch TV at all it will be too antagonistic, and besides, he does need to chill, just as every one does. Instead of saying something vague, like, "You've got to help me," be specific, and say, "I will be going to the store (for a walk, whatever) from 7-8:30 on Tues. and you will be here to take care of the kids. I really appreciate your help, honey." Give him a kiss on the cheek or pat him on the shoulder (it helps to "cement a contract" of sorts if you have physical contact--it will get his attention, too, since he's ADD) and make sure you make statements rather than asking questions. I've learned THAT the hard way! [img]:smile:[/img] I do not think that putting your difficult child in school means you are a failure. It simply means that you are outsourcing, using resources wisely. Just reframe your thinking, and it will be a huge load off of your shoulders. As for the medications, I can't help you there ... it sounds like the docs have a completely diff mindset than you do. Does your difficult child zone out after ea episode? What do you do afterward? {Hugs} [/QUOTE]
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