I just keep on bouncing back and forth between acceptance, ambivalence, weak detachment and then enabling-my ex and Dcs exgf's mom seem to get it. He has had SO many chances to improve his lot, but doesn't seem to be able or willing to follow through. I read on here with envy, all the posts by the warriors who have got it-am I EVER going to be there? I am in therapy, I read here a lot, I accept him as he is on some level and he has stated more than once that he's okay with this, though this winter is kicking his backside. So when he tells me he's not eating or sleeping and has lost all his stuff (or had it stolen) then I just become enveloped in sadness. Then he'll tell me he has decided long ago that he's NOT going to get a job (because he doesn't want to) and that the other day, he made $ 65 panhandling! What???? He'll hear voices and check into a hospital, then decide he doesn't like it in there and leaves. All I can think of now is him, skinny, messed up, freezing to death somewhere in a doorway. I know that's catastrophising, but guys, I have been doing this for YEARS now and it doesn't seem to be getting any better. Just venting. You all have told me everything that I can do to help MYSELF and I do have some happiness in my life, but I wonder if I'll ever have peace of mind. It's two steps forward and one step back. And he's 1,000 miles away! Not knocking on my door or blowing up my phone. It just stinks.