Why can't people just understand?!?!?!!?

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by TerryJ2, Nov 27, 2007.

  1. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    I understand your frustration.

    I don't recall the situation with-the March deadline, so I'll just address the 1st issue.

    I have an idea. Just to show you what it looks like from the other side, I have a s-i-l, R, with-health issues, and she has opted out of several highly emotional family responsibilities with-no reasons stated. She has problems with-her wrists and gets tired of telling people. But when she just says "no," it sounds like she's being rude.
    One example was when her father needed help when he lost most of his sight, and a cpls yrs later, had hip surgery, and my other s-i-l called R repeatedly and asked for help. R. said she couldn't. Flat out no. H got mad and called me. R would talk to me but not H. because she was afraid of H's anger. I think she may have been embarrassed by her disability, too, but was afraid to be honest with-H.
    husband and I live in another state, so flew up a cpl times a yr to help, but certainly not to the extent that H. wanted.
    R. also couldn't/wouldn't help clean out her father's apt after he died, because of her wrists. But she could have showed up to go through papers, or at least to keep people company ... at least, that's the perspective of H.

    I think it's important to communicate. In your case, I'd suggest saying "She has health issues," and leave it at that. That way, it's honest and real, but doesn't divulge too much personal info.
  2. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    I agree, just giving the simplest response without giving away too much information is best.

    I totally feel your pain - my loco sister is like that. She will keep asking questions and prying until she hears what she wants to hear. It's very frustrating.
  3. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    My Mom once asked me -

    Where DO you find the time to do what you need to do in a day, put a roof over your head, your sons head, buy food, pay bills, work 2 jobs, cook, clean, raise your child AND worry about <u>what everyone else thinks?

    You're going to wear yourself out before you get started kiddo.

    LETITGOoooooooooooooooooo. I really have been there done that - and didn't like it much either. But I stopped spending SO much time worrying about what others thought - it gave me more time to think about the things that were really important to ME.

    I have so fantastic comebacks - but then I realized THAT giving a snappy comeback to someone who's opinion I didn't value ANYWAY was taking MORE of MY TIME. So I just learned to walk away and as I walked away I closed my eyes, stuck out my tongue and carried on with my life. Just don't do that near a frozen anything.

  4. Big Bad Kitty

    Big Bad Kitty lolcat

    And on the same subject as the Loan Ranger,

    iffn they are renting space in yer head,


    Then, you can buy your car. Or something.