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Why did God make moms according to 2nd graders....
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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 356798"><p><strong><span style="color: #804000"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'"><span style="font-size: 12px">WHY did God Make Moms according to 2nd graders:</span></span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><u><span style="color: #804000"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">Why did God make mothers?</span></span></u></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">2.. Mostly to clean the house.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: black"></span></p><p><span style="color: black"></span><strong><u><span style="color: #804000"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">How did God make mothers?</span></span></u></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">3. God made my mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: black"></span></p><p><span style="color: black"></span><strong><u><span style="color: #804000"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">What ingredients are mothers made of?</span></span></u></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: black"></span></p><p><span style="color: black"></span><strong><u><span style="color: #804000"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?</span></span></u></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">1. We're related.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's mom like me.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: black"></span></p><p><span style="color: black"></span><strong><u><span style="color: #804000"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">What kind of a little girl was your mom?</span></span></u></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">1. My mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">3. They say she used to be nice.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: black"></span></p><p><span style="color: black"></span><strong><u><span style="color: #804000"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?</span></span></u></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">1. His last name.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: black"></span></p><p><span style="color: black"></span><strong><u><span style="color: #804000"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">Why did your mom marry your dad?</span></span></u></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">1.. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my mom eats a lot</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">2. She got too old to do anything else with him.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">3. My grandma says that mom didn't have her thinking cap on.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: black"></span></p><p><span style="color: black"></span><strong><u><span style="color: #804000"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">Who's the boss at your house?</span></span></u></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">3. I guess mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: black"></span></p><p><span style="color: black"></span><strong><u><span style="color: #804000"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">What's the difference between moms and dads?</span></span></u></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them..</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">3. Dads are taller and stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friends.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: black"></span></p><p><span style="color: black"></span><strong><u><span style="color: #804000"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">What does your mom do in her spare time?</span></span></u></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">1. Mothers don't do spare time.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: black"></span></p><p><span style="color: black"></span><strong><u><span style="color: #804000"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">What would it take to make your mom perfect?</span></span></u></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: black"></span></p><p><span style="color: black"></span><strong><u><span style="color: #804000"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?</span></span></u></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">2. I'd make my mom smarter.. Then she would know it was my sister who did it not me.</span></span></strong></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: #400040"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'">3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.</span></span></strong><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'sans-serif'"> </span></span></p><p><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'sans-serif'"> </span></span></p><p><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'sans-serif'"></span></span><strong><span style="color: #804000"><span style="font-family: 'Kristen ITC'"><span style="font-size: 12px">WHEN YOU STOP LAUGHING -- SEND IT ON TO OTHER MOTHERS, GRANDMOTHERS, AND AUNTS.....and anyone else who has anything to do with kids or just needs a good laugh!!!</span></span></span></strong></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 356798"] [B][COLOR=#804000][FONT=Kristen ITC][SIZE=3]WHY did God Make Moms according to 2nd graders:[/SIZE][/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#804000][FONT=Kristen ITC][SIZE=3] [/SIZE][/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][U][COLOR=#804000][FONT=Kristen ITC]Why did God make mothers?[/FONT][/COLOR][/U][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]2.. Mostly to clean the house.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [COLOR=black] [/COLOR][B][U][COLOR=#804000][FONT=Kristen ITC]How did God make mothers?[/FONT][/COLOR][/U][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]3. God made my mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [COLOR=black] [/COLOR][B][U][COLOR=#804000][FONT=Kristen ITC]What ingredients are mothers made of?[/FONT][/COLOR][/U][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [COLOR=black] [/COLOR][B][U][COLOR=#804000][FONT=Kristen ITC]Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?[/FONT][/COLOR][/U][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]1. We're related.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's mom like me.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [COLOR=black] [/COLOR][B][U][COLOR=#804000][FONT=Kristen ITC]What kind of a little girl was your mom?[/FONT][/COLOR][/U][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]1. My mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]3. They say she used to be nice.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [COLOR=black] [/COLOR][B][U][COLOR=#804000][FONT=Kristen ITC]What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?[/FONT][/COLOR][/U][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]1. His last name.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [COLOR=black] [/COLOR][B][U][COLOR=#804000][FONT=Kristen ITC]Why did your mom marry your dad?[/FONT][/COLOR][/U][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]1.. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my mom eats a lot[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]2. She got too old to do anything else with him.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]3. My grandma says that mom didn't have her thinking cap on.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [COLOR=black] [/COLOR][B][U][COLOR=#804000][FONT=Kristen ITC]Who's the boss at your house?[/FONT][/COLOR][/U][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]3. I guess mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [COLOR=black] [/COLOR][B][U][COLOR=#804000][FONT=Kristen ITC]What's the difference between moms and dads?[/FONT][/COLOR][/U][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them..[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]3. Dads are taller and stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friends.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [COLOR=black] [/COLOR][B][U][COLOR=#804000][FONT=Kristen ITC]What does your mom do in her spare time?[/FONT][/COLOR][/U][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]1. Mothers don't do spare time.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [COLOR=black] [/COLOR][B][U][COLOR=#804000][FONT=Kristen ITC]What would it take to make your mom perfect?[/FONT][/COLOR][/U][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [COLOR=black] [/COLOR][B][U][COLOR=#804000][FONT=Kristen ITC]If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?[/FONT][/COLOR][/U][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]2. I'd make my mom smarter.. Then she would know it was my sister who did it not me.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#400040][FONT=Kristen ITC]3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.[/FONT][/COLOR][/B][COLOR=black][FONT=sans-serif] [/FONT][/COLOR][B][COLOR=#804000][FONT=Kristen ITC][SIZE=3]WHEN YOU STOP LAUGHING -- SEND IT ON TO OTHER MOTHERS, GRANDMOTHERS, AND AUNTS.....and anyone else who has anything to do with kids or just needs a good laugh!!![/SIZE][/FONT][/COLOR][/B][COLOR=black][FONT=sans-serif] [/FONT][/COLOR] [/QUOTE]
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Why did God make moms according to 2nd graders....
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