Wish me luck! Leaving for difficult child 1's teacher conference

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by gcvmom, Mar 13, 2009.

  1. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    in 30 minutes!

    He's still in bed although he got his medications a half hour ago. They should be kicking in very soon. His alarm just went off. husband is still asleep, too, so I need to go get him up. :rolleyes:

    Hopefully at least his core teachers will all show despite the Pink Slip Friday protest scheduled for this morning.

    Nothing's being decided today. Just gathering feedback and asking questions.

    I'll let you know how it goes!
     
  2. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    Tons o' luck!
     
  3. bran155

    bran155 Guest

    Good luck. Let us know how it goes! :)
     
  4. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Good luck!
    I hope you get some good feedback.
     
  5. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Well, I guess as expected only one teacher showed up (Lang Arts), and she could only stay about 10 minutes because she had to be out front of the school with all the other teachers who were protesting the state layoffs. Our district is cutting 91 classified jobs. Sixty-five percent of the districts in the county are cutting 2,500 jobs, of which 1,200 are expected to be teachers.

    So we met with difficult child 1's counselor and the district nurse who is assigned to him because of his IHP (Independent Health Plan) that he has for the Crohn's (which really isn't relevant right now because he's in remission).

    The counselor had received feedback from most of difficult child 1's teachers. There is definitely a pattern of him not talking to other students. In one class, which is fairly small, they are allowed to sit where they want. He picked a spot in the middle of the room with no one sitting around him at all. Like an island. Sounds like him. I told them how he says he often goes to the library at lunch and doesn't socialize much.

    One teacher said he's very diligent about getting his planner signed, but then he doesn't turn in the work. Yet he'll participate in class discussions and most of the time gives the right answer.

    Another teacher said he could see some anxiety, especially when another student was bothering him and touching him. difficult child 1 reacted by "touching" back, but then decided he probably shouldn't have done that and got up to talk to the teacher about what was going on (which was good).

    In orchestra he sometimes forgets his instrument (leaves it in another class and then it takes a few days to find it). He needs to practice more.

    His Lang Arts teacher said that when he actually DOES the work, he is very good. But it's often late. He had an essay that was due last Thursday. He finally turned it in yesterday. She said it was an "A" paper, but because it was late she has to mark it down. And yesterday I found a stapled packet of work that was incomplete that she'd given back to him to re-do. He hadn't touched it yet.

    My next meeting is Wednesday with the school psychologist and RSP teacher. The S/L specialist has also been invited, though she's only there twice a week. I'm going to ask about auditory and visual processing, language pragmatics, as well as the usual cognitive and psycho-social tests. I'll be giving their list of tests to the neuropsychologist to review to make sure there is no overlap, and then we'll be off and running. Even if we don't get a chance to implement supports for very long this year, at least we should know how to better help him in highschool next year.

    husband went with me, and it was very good to have his support. He made some good comments and suggestions and was helpful in explaining his observations of difficult child 1's behaviors. I think he's finally understanding that it's not just a parenting issue here... and that difficult child 1 really IS a good kid who tries hard, but who is also his own worst enemy because of the way he's wired.
     
  6. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    It sounds to me that he would benefit from an aide who could help him with his personal organisation skills. difficult child 1 had that in his final years of high school. I wish we'd been able to get it for him sooner.

    There are also some practical techniques such an aide could help him set up, but it would also require teacher cooperation.

    Very frustrating when the teachers don't bother showing up - again, we had that happen with difficult child 1. It aosl unfortunately followed through with their lack of support of the aide, so a lot of time got wasted b ythe aide in having to follow up with teachers and personally track them down to get from them the info she required. Which made me realise - if difficult child 1's organisation skills were already badly flawed, then what sort of example were his teachers setting? And if his teachers couldn't get their act together, what right did they have to penalise difficult child 1?

    I think your first step could be to try to arrange for some sort of suppot with personal organisation skills, see where that takes you. Any subsequent problems will be unique to your situation.

    Marg
     
  7. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    His Lang Arts teacher said that when he actually DOES the work, he is very good. But it's often late. He had an essay that was due last Thursday. He finally turned it in yesterday. She said it was an "A" paper, but because it was late she has to mark it down. And yesterday I found a stapled packet of work that was incomplete that she'd given back to him to re-do. He hadn't touched it yet.

    Boy, does THAT sound familiar!

    My next meeting is Wednesday with the school psychologist and RSP teacher. The S/L specialist has also been invited, though she's only there twice a week. I'm going to ask about auditory and visual processing, language pragmatics, as well as the usual cognitive and psycho-social tests. I'll be giving their list of tests to the neuropsychologist to review to make sure there is no overlap, and then we'll be off and running.

    Very good. Good luck.


    husband went with me, and it was very good to have his support. He made some good comments and suggestions and was helpful in explaining his observations of difficult child 1's behaviors. I think he's finally understanding that it's not just a parenting issue here... and that difficult child 1 really IS a good kid who tries hard, but who is also his own worst enemy because of the way he's wired.

    Whew! I love it when DHs get on the same page. :)
    __________________
     
  8. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    Sounds like there were some very positive statements regarding difficult child. I know that disorganization that just sinks our difficult children. Neither of the tweedles can handle a planner ~ heck kt can't even get her clothes into a hamper or her personal items in the very cool (she picked it out) basket. Always losing this or that.

    Keeping a good thought for getting next year up & running. You are way ahead of the game. :bravo:
     
  9. ML

    ML Guest

    Actually I heard a lot of positives. I'm so glad husband went and is getting on the same page. That is huge. I also feel good about the fact that he will get testing. Hopefully those results will help with the plan for next year.
     
  10. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I agree it sounds like a lot of positives. I hope the meeting on Wednesday goes well. How nice that husband went and was helpful!
     
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