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Family of Origin
Work and Germany: Abandonment
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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 674501" data-attributes="member: 17461"><p>Yes.</p><p></p><p>I think it is as difficult as it is because the first times happened before we had words. There is no intellectual shield between ourselves and the feelings called from us (or focused onto us).</p><p></p><p>Black, icy water, to revisit those feelings now.</p><p></p><p>But now, we have the tool of work and the integrity of Germany.</p><p></p><p>And each other.</p><p></p><p>Gratitude.</p><p></p><p>Thank you; a small blessing that changes everything.</p><p></p><p>Thank you.</p><p></p><p>I could not disbelieve it without you.</p><p></p><p>It is like breaking an evil spell. Sleeping Beauty kiss of falling in love with our children. We did that. Though we cannot see it <em>that was a choice; was a matter of integrity. Raised as we were, we may have created worlds of hurt and isolation for our children but we did not. That is why I was haunted by what I might have done; I knew what I might have done because it had been done to me and I had devoted my life ~ not just with my children, but in every interaction ~ to not being that person who hurt me. To hurting no one and nothing.</em></p><p></p><p>And all that came from the Sleeping Beauty kiss.</p><p></p><p>And we chose that. We chose well then. We will choose well, now.</p><p></p><p>We are going to be okay, you guys.</p><p></p><p>Cedar</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 674501, member: 17461"] Yes. I think it is as difficult as it is because the first times happened before we had words. There is no intellectual shield between ourselves and the feelings called from us (or focused onto us). Black, icy water, to revisit those feelings now. But now, we have the tool of work and the integrity of Germany. And each other. Gratitude. Thank you; a small blessing that changes everything. Thank you. I could not disbelieve it without you. It is like breaking an evil spell. Sleeping Beauty kiss of falling in love with our children. We did that. Though we cannot see it [I]that was a choice; was a matter of integrity. Raised as we were, we may have created worlds of hurt and isolation for our children but we did not. That is why I was haunted by what I might have done; I knew what I might have done because it had been done to me and I had devoted my life ~ not just with my children, but in every interaction ~ to not being that person who hurt me. To hurting no one and nothing.[/I] And all that came from the Sleeping Beauty kiss. And we chose that. We chose well then. We will choose well, now. We are going to be okay, you guys. Cedar [/QUOTE]
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Work and Germany: Abandonment
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