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General Parenting
World war 3 (about a helmet)
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<blockquote data-quote="Malika" data-source="post: 519081" data-attributes="member: 11227"><p>Yes, it happened just before lunch (he had not yet eaten) and it had been about two and a half hours since he had had breakfast (clocks went forward here last night so timings a bit out) of apple juice, wholemeal bread and chocolate spread and an apple... I did have some kind of instinct the hunger/lack of sustenance was something to do with things. I suspect you are right about the not cuddling him - I should explain that I don't actually do this, I just <strong>feel</strong> like it but my voice becomes kinder and gentler... </p><p>Part of the problem here is that I <strong>hate</strong> the tantrums. Hating them, I enter into negotiation in an attempt to circumvent them... because I know that if I just say "that's the way it is, no helmet, no bike", a huge tantrum will be unleashed, in a bid to get me to change my mind and because in certain moods and at certain times (it's not always like that), a simple "no" will be totally unacceptable to him. Also, I know it sounds ridiculous but it is also part of the truth, my neighbours hear everything that goes on in our house (and I in theirs, lucky me). I do not want them to hear J having tantrums all the time, fuelling their image of him as a bad, unruly kid... </p><p>But none of this changes the fact that really that is what it comes down to, I am just saying this isn't something that can be negotiated and I guess I need to let J ride out all his high drama and tantrum antics without engaging. It is hard!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Malika, post: 519081, member: 11227"] Yes, it happened just before lunch (he had not yet eaten) and it had been about two and a half hours since he had had breakfast (clocks went forward here last night so timings a bit out) of apple juice, wholemeal bread and chocolate spread and an apple... I did have some kind of instinct the hunger/lack of sustenance was something to do with things. I suspect you are right about the not cuddling him - I should explain that I don't actually do this, I just [B]feel[/B] like it but my voice becomes kinder and gentler... Part of the problem here is that I [B]hate[/B] the tantrums. Hating them, I enter into negotiation in an attempt to circumvent them... because I know that if I just say "that's the way it is, no helmet, no bike", a huge tantrum will be unleashed, in a bid to get me to change my mind and because in certain moods and at certain times (it's not always like that), a simple "no" will be totally unacceptable to him. Also, I know it sounds ridiculous but it is also part of the truth, my neighbours hear everything that goes on in our house (and I in theirs, lucky me). I do not want them to hear J having tantrums all the time, fuelling their image of him as a bad, unruly kid... But none of this changes the fact that really that is what it comes down to, I am just saying this isn't something that can be negotiated and I guess I need to let J ride out all his high drama and tantrum antics without engaging. It is hard! [/QUOTE]
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