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World war 3 (about a helmet)
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<blockquote data-quote="TeDo" data-source="post: 519084"><p>We have these types of issues EVERY time he is hungry and I can count on a few days of this EVERY time the clocks change. Both of these are a given and I know to expect them. NOT a good combination. </p><p> It might not be the "no" part. It sounds like it goes deeper than that. Both of my kids get like this whenever things don't go the way they expect them to. They also have a hard time understanding MY logic. Theirs is so different that they just do not see any other possibility but their own. </p><p></p><p>Have you tried Plan B? I am assuming if you'd asked J why he didn't want to wear his helmet, he'd have told you about friend not having to wear one. If that's the case, then I would (and have) said something along the lines of "It's my job as a parent to keep you safe. I take my job very seriously because I love you and care about you so much. I'm sorry friend's mom doesn't feel her son's safety is very important. That makes me sad but I'm glad you will be safe." I have used that kind of logic with difficult child 1 when he plays the "but so-and-so can" card. Because it's a consistent explanation of all things safety, I am hoping some day it will get through to him.</p><p></p><p>As for the guilt about losing it, I have so been there done that. . . . A little more often than I like. It IS hard to maintain our cool 100% of the time when we are bombarded with the behaviors we are dealing with. But keep in mind, we are ONLY human and we WILL makes mistakes and we do have FEELINGS and beliefs of our own and ..... Need I say more?!? Go easy on yourself. You're doing the best you can, by yourself, with what you have. That is all anyone can ask or expect. Do something nice for yourself today.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TeDo, post: 519084"] We have these types of issues EVERY time he is hungry and I can count on a few days of this EVERY time the clocks change. Both of these are a given and I know to expect them. NOT a good combination. It might not be the "no" part. It sounds like it goes deeper than that. Both of my kids get like this whenever things don't go the way they expect them to. They also have a hard time understanding MY logic. Theirs is so different that they just do not see any other possibility but their own. Have you tried Plan B? I am assuming if you'd asked J why he didn't want to wear his helmet, he'd have told you about friend not having to wear one. If that's the case, then I would (and have) said something along the lines of "It's my job as a parent to keep you safe. I take my job very seriously because I love you and care about you so much. I'm sorry friend's mom doesn't feel her son's safety is very important. That makes me sad but I'm glad you will be safe." I have used that kind of logic with difficult child 1 when he plays the "but so-and-so can" card. Because it's a consistent explanation of all things safety, I am hoping some day it will get through to him. As for the guilt about losing it, I have so been there done that. . . . A little more often than I like. It IS hard to maintain our cool 100% of the time when we are bombarded with the behaviors we are dealing with. But keep in mind, we are ONLY human and we WILL makes mistakes and we do have FEELINGS and beliefs of our own and ..... Need I say more?!? Go easy on yourself. You're doing the best you can, by yourself, with what you have. That is all anyone can ask or expect. Do something nice for yourself today. [/QUOTE]
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