Marguerite
Active Member
She's female, and I understand that the rule book on females with Asperger's is currently being rewritten.
Oh, crikey, she sounds like easy child 2/difficult child 2! My genius child, my baby that I HAD to get accelerated into school because she was so amazingly bright. She was only two weeks too young so we forced the issue and got her into school, hoping that would solve the problem of her believing she knew everything.
What helped, for easy child 2/difficult child 2 and especially for easy child - keeping her stimulated, with plenty to do. The teachers would keep throwing more work at each of them and were still scratching their heads wondering how to stop them from being bored.
The problems with easy child 2/difficult child 2 began a few years later, when we noticed that she would insist on doing things her own way to extremes, even flouting authority to do so. Often she really DID know better and it is hard to correct a kid who is right. But she was increasingly pedantic, didactic and condescending with it. Her best friends were generally several years older and despite being accelerated, were still a grade or two ahead.
easy child was also almost accelerated, also chose friends from a grade ahead. However, she didn't suddenly develop problems with information not being laid down - sudden onset in easy child 2/difficult child 2 in Year 4 or 5, it took us until Grade 6 to get it diagnosed as ADD.
easy child 2/difficult child 2 makes good eye contact except with people she doesn't know. And with those, she makes the effort, knowing it's not something she does naturally.
It's possible you may just have an exceptionally bright child on your hands. Or maybe an ADHD kid with possibly some Aspie traits. Or more.
Even a detailed evaluation may not give you all the answers now; you need to keep an open mind on things as she gets older, but from our experience, you work with the problems that are troubling you, as they trouble you. In other words, if it ain't broke, don't fix it.
The fine motor skill issues - check to see if her joints are hypermobile. If they are, it's best to know NOW so you can put measure in place to help her and protect her joints. As it is, she is likely to be arthritic by the time she is 20, if she's hypermobile. Again, this is at least partly connected to some forms of high-functioning autism, as I'm told. I'm still trying to find out more about this - but some Asperger's, hyperlexia, high-functioning autistics and 'missed' Aspies seem to also have hypermobility. Over and over, I find this.
easy child 2/difficult child 2 is an amazing drawer, has been doing intricate fine detailed drawings since she was 2 years old. But the boys - neither of them can draw well. difficult child 3 still draws stick figures, at 14. However, he does have very clever fingers when it comes to electrical wiring and computers.
The melodrama, the strong will, the intense activity, the apparently high intelligence - you will benefit from trying "The Explosive Child" by Ross Greene. Even if she's not explosive at the moment, there will be aspects to her behaviour and her upbringing that will drive you bananas if you don't get a handle on them fast. But if you do, you will find it helps her blossom as an individual with her own strong ideas but still able to be a team player. There is some discussion on this book in Early Childhood, including how to adapt it to younger children. It's been really helpful for us - something we found with the "smart-alec brats" as I fondly called my bright kids - they have an intense sense of injustice and will argue with you about discipline until you are exhausted.
I hope you are just dealing with an intelligent child. You still need help and support, but the joys are also there, if you can give her the help she needs and the knowledge she will be craving. Providing an enriched environment is the first and best thing to do.
Marg
Oh, crikey, she sounds like easy child 2/difficult child 2! My genius child, my baby that I HAD to get accelerated into school because she was so amazingly bright. She was only two weeks too young so we forced the issue and got her into school, hoping that would solve the problem of her believing she knew everything.
What helped, for easy child 2/difficult child 2 and especially for easy child - keeping her stimulated, with plenty to do. The teachers would keep throwing more work at each of them and were still scratching their heads wondering how to stop them from being bored.
The problems with easy child 2/difficult child 2 began a few years later, when we noticed that she would insist on doing things her own way to extremes, even flouting authority to do so. Often she really DID know better and it is hard to correct a kid who is right. But she was increasingly pedantic, didactic and condescending with it. Her best friends were generally several years older and despite being accelerated, were still a grade or two ahead.
easy child was also almost accelerated, also chose friends from a grade ahead. However, she didn't suddenly develop problems with information not being laid down - sudden onset in easy child 2/difficult child 2 in Year 4 or 5, it took us until Grade 6 to get it diagnosed as ADD.
easy child 2/difficult child 2 makes good eye contact except with people she doesn't know. And with those, she makes the effort, knowing it's not something she does naturally.
It's possible you may just have an exceptionally bright child on your hands. Or maybe an ADHD kid with possibly some Aspie traits. Or more.
Even a detailed evaluation may not give you all the answers now; you need to keep an open mind on things as she gets older, but from our experience, you work with the problems that are troubling you, as they trouble you. In other words, if it ain't broke, don't fix it.
The fine motor skill issues - check to see if her joints are hypermobile. If they are, it's best to know NOW so you can put measure in place to help her and protect her joints. As it is, she is likely to be arthritic by the time she is 20, if she's hypermobile. Again, this is at least partly connected to some forms of high-functioning autism, as I'm told. I'm still trying to find out more about this - but some Asperger's, hyperlexia, high-functioning autistics and 'missed' Aspies seem to also have hypermobility. Over and over, I find this.
easy child 2/difficult child 2 is an amazing drawer, has been doing intricate fine detailed drawings since she was 2 years old. But the boys - neither of them can draw well. difficult child 3 still draws stick figures, at 14. However, he does have very clever fingers when it comes to electrical wiring and computers.
The melodrama, the strong will, the intense activity, the apparently high intelligence - you will benefit from trying "The Explosive Child" by Ross Greene. Even if she's not explosive at the moment, there will be aspects to her behaviour and her upbringing that will drive you bananas if you don't get a handle on them fast. But if you do, you will find it helps her blossom as an individual with her own strong ideas but still able to be a team player. There is some discussion on this book in Early Childhood, including how to adapt it to younger children. It's been really helpful for us - something we found with the "smart-alec brats" as I fondly called my bright kids - they have an intense sense of injustice and will argue with you about discipline until you are exhausted.
I hope you are just dealing with an intelligent child. You still need help and support, but the joys are also there, if you can give her the help she needs and the knowledge she will be craving. Providing an enriched environment is the first and best thing to do.
Marg
...stupid school board!) his attention was riveted and those teachers
