Wow! It Worked!

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Bunny

Guest
Saturday in our house is take out night. Either we out to eat, or we bring something in. easy child had a hockey game this morning and when we got home husband realized that he stepped in dog poop. So before we went out he was cleaning off easy child's shoe. difficult child asked easy child what dad was doing and easy child told him "cleaning dog poop off my shoe." difficult child started on his thing. "I'm not going if his shoe has poop on it." We told him that it doesn't have poop on it anymore. He still carrying on and announces that he's not going to the restaurant and that "mom will just have to stay home with me." Ummm...I don't think so. I told him that we were going out to eat, with him or without him, and I got up and got ready to go. "What do you mean you're going without me?" Just what I said. If you want to go, get your shoes and your coat. If not, we're going because this is what we planned for dinner. Make a decision.

He went, and was, for the most part, well behaved.

Score one for mom!!
 
T

TeDo

Guest
I tried this tonight with difficult child 1. It DIDN'T work!! Grrrrr He cheerily said "okay, see ya later" and went to watch TV. Please tell me the SECRET. Apparently I didn't do something right. LOL
 

InsaneCdn

Well-Known Member
TeDo... you didn't do anything wrong.

You will notice that Bunny's difficult child insisted on TWO things...
1) staying home, and
2) MOM staying home too.

Bunny did NOT stand up to difficult child staying home.
She DID stand up to his insistence that SHE stay home too.

Because the difficult child did not want to be alone... it forced his hand.

YOUR dear difficult child, doesn't mind and/or would rather be alone?
In which case, what would happen if you insisted on getting some unpopular babysitter?
(just trying to be creative)
 
T

TeDo

Guest
I've never had a babysitter outside of family....can't even say I know of anyone to even threaten him with. Yes, at 13 years old, he likes being home alone. Guess I won't try that one again. He even made himself something to eat while difficult child 2 and I were out. It WAS more peaceful and pleasant without him though.....difficult child 2 and I don't usually get to spend much time together alone to talk about things.
 

ABS

New Member
Woot!!

We had almost the exact encounter with our daughter this past November. We were heading to Florida to visit family and stopped at a rest area. My husband had gotten poo on his shoes and was cleaning it off when our daughter spotted him. She REFUSED to get in the car unless he threw the shoe away. I decided to stay out of this battle and was taking care of our little one (secretly preparing for the worst and praying no one calls the police because of her screaming). husband simply looked at her and told her he had cleaned it all off, got in the car and started it and put it in gear. She sat outside for a second, screamed again and got in the car. Win!
 

Ktllc

New Member
Thumbs up for Mom!!
Just a thought though: could dog poo be so unbareable to him and that's why it would start a whole incident?? It could be sensory but he would still have to deal with it in a civil maner.
The only reason I mention it is because I have a crazy nose. Even cleaned shoes that were previously in poo will bother me. The odor just does not go away that easily.
 
B

Bunny

Guest
I don't think it was the smell because after husband cleaned off the shoe he sprayed the bottom of it with Lysol and you really could not smell anything bad. I think the thought that easy child actually stepped in poop was what freaked him out, because poop if gross.

Tedo, ICD is right. I had no problems leaving him home. Really, going out for dinner with just easy child is really enjoyable. I was not going to stay home with him, and that was what he wanted. IF he can't get, then I can't go either. He realized that was not going to happen, so if he wanted take out night he needed to go because he was not getting his way.

We had another instance this morning. A friend gave me a doughnut maker for my birthday and difficult child has been chomping at the bit to make doughnuts, so I told him that we would make them this morning when husband and easy child were at hockey practice. They were leaving for practice at 9:30 am. difficult child knew what the requirements were. So at about 8:30 he starts wigging out because I won't make doughnuts "RIGHT NOW!!!!!" I calmy told him that I told him we would make them when dad and easy child had left for practice. He carried on for a while, and started with, "If we don't make them now we're not making them at all." Okay. Fine by me. Then I get that if we don't make doughnuts he won't empty the dishwasher. Okay, that's your choice, but if you don't empty the dishwasher then you get to sit on your bed today doing nothing because refusal to do chores = no priviledges. All this time I was sitting in the kitchen because easy child was eating breakfast and I didn't trust that difficult child would leave easy child alone. easy child finishes eating. I get him to go upstairs and get dressed, I go upstairs to make my bed, difficult child follows me, still squawking about the doughnuts. He comes in my room, still having fits. I told him to leave, which he did (surprisingly). A few minutes later, stood at my door and asked if he could come in. He tells me that he's sorry and asks if we can still make doughnuts. I told him that if he stayed calm and did everything that he needed to do, we could make them at the time that I said we would make them. I now have two plates of mini doughnuts sitting in my kitchen.

I think that weaning difficult child off of the Zoloft is helping. A few weeks ago he never would have been able to calm himself down enough for either of these episodes to end well.
 
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