You can only be as happy as your saddest child ...

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by shellyd67, Sep 21, 2012.

  1. shellyd67

    shellyd67 Active Member

    I heard this statement on Oprah radio while driving the other day.

    It really struck a chord.

    It is definetly the case with me.

    How many of us feel this way ?
  2. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    I think it's a wee bit extreme.

    I will agree that my happiness is definitely tempered by wherever my difficult children are at...
    But my difficult child goes to extreme lows, and if my happiness depended on difficult child's happiness... we'd both be dead.
  3. Tiredof33

    Tiredof33 Active Member

    My difficult child is, of course, a Drama King! so I really don't agree with it at all. IC lol I feel the same way.
  4. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    difficult child 1 is never happy, I mean never. Food is her only comfort. If I had to base my happiness on difficult child's moods I'd be one big huge depressed downer. Luckily I have learned to shrug off her moods and not let them affect my own. It took awhile to learn but now I'm good with it.
  5. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    I understand the sentiment.
  6. Liahona

    Liahona Guest

    I used to be like this. Back when difficult child 1 was little and everything was starting. I've had to detach a bit and learn to be happy even when they aren't. I'd be an emotional roller-coaster (even more than I am) if I didn't.
  7. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I understand the sentiment too. Especially when my difficult child was a little girl. However, time has taught me that I just can't go there with her, it turns out to be too much for me and an ordinary experience for her............
  8. Anxworrier

    Anxworrier New Member

    I absolutely get it! While it is not healthy or ideal, it is where I am right now. my difficult child boy is struggling and so am I. All mainly tied to school work stress, my anxiety peaks sun thru thurs and only tonigh and tomorrow will I breathe easier. When either of my kids are down it affects me deeply. I think this is just primarily my personality...very sensitive. Not everyone is as hypersensitive as i am. Thank goodness or the world wouldn't function well! Lol
  9. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    This was and still is somewhat true for me. Cory and I are so closely connected that we would almost cycle at the same time and I was definitely enmeshed with him. If things were going well with him, life was good for me. When he is in a bad place, my life takes a nose dive. This is even somewhat true today. I get in huge fights with Tony about defending Cory. Supposedly I can see no wrong with the boy. My theory is that I see myself in him so I can be more empathetic. Tony claims he is perfectly sane so everything wrong has to be my fault. Ha!
  10. lonelyroad

    lonelyroad New Member

    I quote this all the time, and I beleive it..