you've all heard "too good to be true?"

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by neednewtechnique, Sep 29, 2007.

  1. neednewtechnique

    neednewtechnique New Member

    Well, that's what I am beginning to think about our difficult child's new medication. See, when she first moved in with us, she was raging, violently, nearly EVERYDAY, sometimes SEVERAL TIMES A DAY. This started in January, and carried through pretty much until the end of the school year. When summer hit, we took her off ADHD stims for the summer, and things improved. She was only raging once or twice a week, and not nearly as violent or agressive. Once we realized that, the psychiatrist decided she was definitely NOT adhd, and decided to try to treat her for Bipolar. She went on Lamictal in August, and has been COMPLETELY RAGE FREE EVER SINCE. Don't get me wrong, she is still FAR from being in the easy child category, there are other issues that are still a problem, but with the rages behind us, her father and I, we can handle ANYTHING else.

    It just seems that it is almost too good to be true...if that makes any sense. I just keep waiting for the other shoe to drop, and it makes me a little nervous. You see, difficult child raged from the day she moved in, so although I had a chance to build somewhat of a relationship with her, it was always still kind of guarded, but since she has been so pleasant to be around, it has been easier to spend quality time with her, and I am completely attached to her, and I don't know what I will do if she goes back to raging again.

    The thing is, she is still only at the intro dose of her Lamictal, 25 mg, and I know that intro dose really isn't even supposed to be "theraputic dosage" of that medication, so I am sort of confused as to HOW the world it has helped THAT MUCH THAT QUICKLY.

    I have heard a few of you mention "the magic bullet", but do you really believe that exists??? Could it honestly be true that each of our little wonders has an exact right combination of medication and therapy and good parenting that will turn them into little angels??? Like I said, we still have a long way to go to get this new medication to where it should be, and there are still certain behaviors that need work, but going from where she started raging to now, it is like she is a completely DIFFERENT KID!!!
  2. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    While it's very true that there is no magic bullet, usually when the right medication is found, or the right medication combo, the change can be profound.

    With Nichole is was night and day. I finally had the girl I'd only gotten short glimpses of before medications.

    Oh, and she's still on the low doses of the medications. We've had a few rocky patches, but she's still doing well and it's been 3 yrs with these dosages.

    And it's normal to be expecting the other shoe to drop. :rofl:

    The longer the improvement lasts, you'll begin to relax some.

    Glad her medications are helping! :smile:
  3. morningcuppa

    morningcuppa New Member

    Wonderful news. So happy for you. I've often wondered if my difficult child is bipolar rather than adhd. Diagnosis is not easy in the UK.

    Hope things continue to go well.
  4. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts


    Finding the right medication is wonderful. I know that for kt & wm we're kind of at an "as good as it gets" period.

    But to have a new medication added & to see your difficult child stabilize - ahhh, it's in my humble opinion, a miracle.

    I'm so glad that difficult children rages have stopped. I'm hoping that with therapy things will calm down further with difficult child. That she learns her sense of self; is accepting of the situation & can learn to make safe, everyday choices.

    Thanks for sharing the good news.
  5. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I have "too good to be true" medications. They have changed me and given me a life. Literally, before this particular combo of medications, I was a suicidal mess with lots of anger issues. Everyone is different. I don't know why these medications are so magical for me, but they are. So, since I've lived it, YES it can happen. I don't know how common it is, but I know others who have had miraculous changes with medications. And some who haven't. It's all very individual. I no longer even feel the need to go to therapy because the stuff I used to get so upset about doesn't upset me as much. I can deal with it.
  6. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    medications or other interventions can seem to good to be true. And some people just need very low doses of certain medications to get full effect (good or bad). I have an aunt who takes 1/4 of a PEDIATRIC dose of most medications, OTC or prescribed, and they work very well. At the full adult dose, or even full pediatric dose, she is overdosed. It took her a while to learn this, and surgery is scary because most docs brush this off, but it is just her body.

    I am glad that you have gotten to see a wonderful side of her. Enjoy it.

    And, yes, it can seem too good to be true, waiting for the other shoe to drop. Over time this will lessen, as long as you keep her medications in line.

    Be very careful to train/educate her that she must NOT go off her medications no matter what others tell her. We have friends who have 2 very bipolar children. The son has had some wild cycles, but finally was stabilized and grown up enough to know he HAS to have medications or his life will stink. The daughter is SOOOOO not there. She goes off medications as soon as she is stabilized and she is now rarely able to get stabilized. She has a very very scary, unhappy life. She does not realize it, but she is blessed to have a mom who will raise her son. She is too dangerous to be unsupervised with him.



    ps. My son has been quite open about the fact that if he tries illegal drugs or alcohol it may/will kill him. So far, so good. But I worked with this for many many years.
  7. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Yes, we have a "too good to be true" medication, too, so it can happen. It's just that it's lucky and rare!
    Way To Go!
    I've got my fingers crossed for your difficult child's continuing success.
  8. neednewtechnique

    neednewtechnique New Member

    You will not BELIEVE what I found today as I was rifling through the "pill drawer". I feel so stupid, as I just wrote this post the other day, describing how WELL my daughter's "new medications" are working for her.... HA!!! I came across her bottle, and figured she must be getting close to being out of pills, since her medication check appointment is tomorrow, and I opened the bottle, and it is nearly FULL!!!! She has barely been taking her medications the last month, so I am beginning to wonder if she EVEN NEEDS THEM anymore???? Out of 30 in a month, she has taken 18, so about every other day. Do any of you think this makes a difference?? Is it maybe staying in her system JUST LONG enough to help for 2 days??? Or does Lamictal wear off every day, and she has managed rage free for this long with NO medications?!??!?!?!?! THAT doesn't hardly seem possible, but just maybe???
  9. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    That seems a little far fetched. I can't remember if lamictal takes a while to reach full effects, but many medications do. That means that they are not out of the body in a day either.

    She is 13. It is probably time for you to get a daily pill box, with compartments for as many times a day as she takes medications. Then it will be something you can follow and make sure she has taken them.

    At 13 most kids are not good about daily medications. Or even toothbrushing. medications are important, so you need to take the responsibility for this out of her hands.

    If you can do it with-o anger, then it will work smoother. Just try to have the box near where you keep the coffee, so you can have her take it in the am, or where you keep something you see in the evening, if she takes it at night. THen You just say, "here's your medications, Thanks" and go on.

    Maybe keep your medications in a pill box color coded for you, and hers next to them in one color coded for her?

    This just makes it something you hopefully won't have to fight about, as opposed to, "You didn't take your medications all last month!!!" Which is something I have actually said.

    I know exactly how frustrated you are, I truly have walked in your shoes.

    Deep breaths, lady, deep breaths.

  10. neednewtechnique

    neednewtechnique New Member

    Nomad, Good to know, so I am not the only one who has had this INEXPLAINABLE MIRACLE happen in my house after starting Lamictal.

    I can't hardly say this is a "miracle medication" as I am sure that there are people who have had not as good results as we have, but I have simply been amazed at how well I hear this medication working for our BiPolar (BP) angels!!
  11. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    It may be as simple as the fact that you took her off ADHD stimulants. Maybe those were the culprit in causing her to rage. Honestly, I'm not sure that 25 mg Lamictal every other day or so would make that much of a difference. But you should definitely ask the psychiatrist.

    by the way, I would never trust a 13-year-old to take her own medications. Not only are kids this age unreliable, but I also think there's a risk of intentional or accidental overdose.
  12. neednewtechnique

    neednewtechnique New Member

    This all started in the counselor's office one day at the end of the year last year. See, our difficult child never had "involved" parents before she moved in with us. She was pretty much always left to take care of herself. So, moving in with us was a big shocker, when we wanted to do things for her, and there were certain things that we insisted she NOT be allowed to do without supervision...etc. So, instead of realizing that this was NORMAL involvement for a kid her age, she took it as being treated like a baby.

    So, her and the counselor worked together to come up with a list of things that she wanted to do for herself, and a list of things that she was willing to allow us to be in charge of. One of the things she asked for us to allow her to be in charge of was her medication. We had a big discussion about this, because my husband and I felt like it was too much responsibility for a girl her age, but she had concerns of her own. Apparently, mom used to sustain her drug habits by swiping difficult child's stims when she dispensed them to her in the mornings!!! OMG, yeah that's what we thought, too. So, with the counselor's agreement, we decided that she would be allowed, and at first, it was probably a good thing we did. That is actually how we discovered the possibility that the STIMS might be what was actually CAUSING her problem in the first place. We started to notice a definite PATTERN that she was MUCH more pleasant to be around on days that she "forgot" to take her medicine...and that kind of spiked our attention that something was VERY wrong. For a while, she did really good, and didn't forget very often, it was only recently that she started to have problems remembering, and we ALL agreed that she was responsible enough to ensure she was taking the proper dosage, and she isn't in any way suicidal, so intentional overdose wasn't a concern either. I think we have reached an agreement that for now, although we will continue to allow her to get her own medication, we will be telling her when it is time to take it, and making sure she does, in fact, take it.
  13. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Nichole has always taken her own medications. For the most part she's been pretty responsible about it.

    BUT even she can forget. And I always know cuz the change is immediate.

    So we got her a medication minder. Works wonderfully.

    With Nichole it wasn't that she was not taking her medications on purpose. She'd do this thing where she couldn't recall if she'd taken them or not, didn't want to do the double dose thing. Then wound up without because she hadn't actually taken them.

    Might sound a bit out there, but heck I do it to. I can go to take my medications in the morning, something will distract me and I'm not sure if I actually took the darn things or not. :slap:

    Still, I do check up on Nichole on a reg basis. This is easier with the medication minder. All I have to do is check the slot. lol