Next week I will be facing situation that will be hard for me to deal emotionally. There is an intern in my workplace. She is local and I have kind of known her and her parents a long time, not well but known who they are and said hi, when met. She is two years older than my GFG. We haven't been at work same time for few weeks (summer holidays etc.) and during that time GFG shared something with me that involved this girl.
When GFG was home we talked few times about bullying he endured while younger and some incidents simply freak me out. This one is probably worst. GFG finds an incident hurtful because of emotional factors and I'm not even sure if he really understands why I got so freaked out about it (he is still young and stupid enough to think that he has nine lives, I'm not.) It happened several years ago and I'm sure also the kids involved didn't understand how it could had ended, they probably just thought it was funny. But however I look about it, I can't get over the fact, that it was very possible, even likely, that after that day, I could had had only one child left. Kids got crazy lucky and GFG was physically unharmed, just little scared and feeling bad about others bullying him again. He never told anyone about it before now.
Okay, when it happened also this girl was a kid. She was young teen and I do understand she probably didn't really grasp how dangerous thing it was they did. It wasn't her idea and she probably just went with the pack. She is a good kid who was involved in something really stupid (and mean) that could had ended really badly and luckily didn't, but it's probably not something she even thinks any more at all. She is fun girl and we have had a good rapport, but now I have hard time trying to psych myself up to behave like nothing would be any different with her. It's not my job to confront her with this in anyway and I'm sure it's not something she even really remembers (because she has not avoided me or anything, she does know I'm GFG's mother so if she felt guilty or something because of this I'm sure she would had been uncomfortable around me.) But it is very difficult for me to think working and chatting with her like nothing had changed when I'm waking up middle of the night in terror after dreaming about watching divers bringing up my child's cold and drowned body.
How on earth I'm going to make it through next month working with her?