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Thread: Some people are pure idiots (re: unpaid child support)

  1. #1
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    Some people are pure idiots (re: unpaid child support)

    So M's bio dad is a putz. Always has been, always will be. One thing he has always done though is worked. Good paying job contracts. He has NEVER willingly sent a single payment in all of M's 18 years of life. Not a single payment. The payments are not even a fifth of what he SHOULD have paid based on our court systems payment amount chart. He got off easy because I asked for a much smaller amount as a "show of good faith" and allowed him to contribute extra as he saw fit. Not only did he never see fit to contribute more, the support just grew and grew.

    Every 2-3 years he'll file all of his taxes at once and I will get a large payment since any tax refunds are garnished and sent to me. Otherwise, zip. Nada. The amount he owes me is absolutely insane.

    Before M moved across country, right after his 18th bday, bio dad called him (shocking in itself!!). During the call he mentioned he was angry that his tax return was once again garnished 100% (he'd withheld filing last year in anticipation of filing both years this year and making sure I didn't get a penny). He told M that now that he was 18, he was going to take me to court to end the child support since he was over 18, leaving school and moving out. He told M that now he can finally have a drivers license, get credit, buy a car, get a mortgage etc. All things he hasn't had for the past 18 years because here in this province these things are all prohibited if you are in arrears of support. He went on to tell M that now that he is over 18, the debt is gone and how dare I be getting his tax refund.

    So Friday the tax refund comes, just shy of $1K which was nice since S/O isn't working yet since his graduation. I mention it to M who tells me that his dad called him again and ranted about this. He also said that I'll be getting court papers because his dad says this is somehow my doing, blah blah blah.

    I just had to laugh. This is perfect. He will never arrive for court if I had started the proceedings. By him starting it, I can finally get him in front of the judge here in town. The same judge who said if child support for M was in arrears again in her court, she was jailing bio dad.

    Now don't get me wrong, I will openly tell the judge jailing him does nothing, certainly doesn't get me my back support. However, he avoided court in the past when I started the actions because he didn't want to give a court his employer information, by which he can have 60% of his pay garnished until his support is up to date. This judge also was angry at his failing to appear for the last series of hearings (many years ago) because she had to base his support on earning minimum wage since we had no documentation of his earnings. She made it clear that if we go to court again, she would require all tax returns since M's birth and would sign a order at the proper court mandated amount for his income, in retro payment.

    So not only will he have to provide his employer information, but he will also end up drastically altering his debt load to me. Frankly I could care less about the money. I've never had it coming into the household budget so it isn't something I give thought to. M however told me he'd feel better knowing that his father was made to "man up" and pay proper support, and has asked me to ensure the court does order the charted amount in arrears. M isn't trying to punish his father, he actually is giving his father (in M's mind) a chance to fix his lack of contributions and make M have a bit of respect for him.

    So he's about to accumulate a huge amount of debt beyond the current amount, he will have to provide his employer information and he still won't have a license or ability to get credit cards, a car and a mortgage. The guys an idiot.

    The dumbest part is that to end the support, all that is needed for him to contact the child support enforcement agency and notify them that M does not live here any longer. The agency would then confirm it with me, and the monthly amount would not longer be attributed to him as a debt. Instead he's being a putz and taking me to court, which is going to bite him in the who-zee-whats-it.
    Me - 38 years old
    GFG (now known as former-GFG) - nearly 20!!, moved cross country in April 2011, maturing into the man I have dreamed for him to be, a old soul
    PC - 13/yrs old, morphing into young lady, witty, insightful, grounded, stuggling with anxiety and panic attacks
    S/O - 41 years old, best friend, a pillar, together 8 years

  2. #2
    Mind Reader hearts and roses's Avatar
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    Re: Some people are pure idiots (re: unpaid child support)

    Yep, he's a puts, all right, just like my ex and biodad to PC and gfg. Looooooooosers.
    Used to be JoG

    Me (Jo, 50) Trying to hold a positive thought. Asthmatic, left knee replacement; celebrex, Prozac, Supplements.
    DH (P, 51) Good guy; sober 6 yrs; vitamins.
    DD (PC) J 25: Doing really well! Lives at home.
    DD (GFG/PC) G 23: Sleeper~Engaged/Lives with bf (E). Wedding: 8/25/13.
    Bio-dad(exH): Communicates with his dds directly, which I love...☺
    "Don't put the key to your happiness in someone else's pocket - keep it
    in your own."

  3. #3
    CD Hall of Fame donna723's Avatar
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    Re: Some people are pure idiots (re: unpaid child support)

    That sounds exactly like something my ex would have done!
    donna723

  4. #4
    CD Hall of Fame upallnight's Avatar
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    Re: Some people are pure idiots (re: unpaid child support)

    Let's hope he doesn't "smarten up" before he goes to court. He's a total loser! Less than $1,000 for 2 years???? And he has the nerve to complain, to his own child? What is that, 10 dollars a week?? He sounds too dumb to even be ashamed of himself.
    ME-age 45
    GFG-age 24, doing well
    PC-age 20 boy, student
    PC -age 18 boy depression, I walk on eggshells day and night

  5. #5
    Nana's are Beautiful Hound dog's Avatar
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    Re: Some people are pure idiots (re: unpaid child support)

    Putz.

    This is a case of shooting yourself in the foot.
    Lisa

    Katie 33 (gfg) - Married to M (moron man) K12, A11 MRDD, E 7
    PC 28 (RN)- Darrin 9, Brandon 4, Connor 2year
    Travis 26 (gfg) - PDD TS, CP, legally blind, epilepsy, polycythemia
    Nichole: 23 (ex-gfg ): Aubrey 6 yrs Oliver 1 yr
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  6. #6
    Night Fury! Get down! StepTo2's Avatar
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    Re: Some people are pure idiots (re: unpaid child support)

    I'd love it if he'd send some of that putziness to BM.

    I know the moment she finds out Onyxx isn't here - permanently - we will go back to court.

    And they will have HER pay support to the state, or RTC...
    Me - 40, depression, Celexa
    DH - 43, depression, PTSD... Disabled Vet, lots o' meds
    Jett - 14M, ADD/LD/FAS/PDD NOS (alphabet kid), no meds
    MegaBean - 7 months, F, PC

    Possum, Squirrel & Bubbles - LOLCats and LOLDog (all PC)

    Onyxx - 18F, depression, PTSD, bipolar, stomach issues, med-resistant. She and BF are house-hopping...
    Raven - 20M, lives in NC

  7. #7
    HaoZi
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    Re: Some people are pure idiots (re: unpaid child support)

    I can't wait to see how it turns out if he does it and the judge remembers.

  8. #8
    CD Hall of Fame keista's Avatar
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    Re: Some people are pure idiots (re: unpaid child support)

    WOW were you married to my DH too?

    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAnd I bet he thinks all that past child support debt just VANISHES!?!?!?!

    Good for M wanting his dad to pay up. That phone conversation was so not cool. Poor kid for having to put up with it. Sound like the son is more the grown up than the father.
    Me: MDD, PMS/PMDD, GAD, OCD, Hoarder Wellbutrin 150 mg And some ppl think I'm an Aspie too.
    son: 16 Aspie, Depression, ADD Abilify 5mg
    DD1: 11 Mood disorder, Aspie, Hoarder. Welbutrin 150mg
    DD2: 9 Emerging mood disorder but she's such a happy sunshiny girl, I'm hoping she won't need meds til after puberty - if ever.

    "I don't care what label you put on my child as long as he/she gets the help that they need!"
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  9. #9
    CD Hall of Fame KTMom91's Avatar
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    Re: Some people are pure idiots (re: unpaid child support)

    Here in CA, there is no statute of limitations on child support. If the papers are filed with the courts, the state continues to collect, whether the child is over 18 or not. My mom got a check from the state for back child support when my brother was in his 20's. She was thrilled. My dad was not.
    Cast of Characters:

    Me (Mary) - 50, stressed, overweight, Effexor XR, Metformin

    DH - 52, ADD, Ritalin, married 12 years

    GFG (Miss KT) - 21, ADHD/ODD, Ritalin, college graduate!

    Son #1 - 31, electrician

    Son #2 - 29, computer guru, married to K, toddler Maddie and newborn Charlotte

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  10. #10
    Night Fury! Get down! StepTo2's Avatar
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    Re: Some people are pure idiots (re: unpaid child support)

    Same thing here - CSEA will collect until the arrears are caught up.
    Me - 40, depression, Celexa
    DH - 43, depression, PTSD... Disabled Vet, lots o' meds
    Jett - 14M, ADD/LD/FAS/PDD NOS (alphabet kid), no meds
    MegaBean - 7 months, F, PC

    Possum, Squirrel & Bubbles - LOLCats and LOLDog (all PC)

    Onyxx - 18F, depression, PTSD, bipolar, stomach issues, med-resistant. She and BF are house-hopping...
    Raven - 20M, lives in NC

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