Welcome to my pity party.

[Wiped Out]

(((Hugs))) Your gfg2 sounds similar to my pc/gfg who always says she isn't ready to be an adult (too late-she is 18). I worry to if she will ever move out because getting her to take any risks is very difficult.

[Dammit Janet]

Yes, I hate to tell him, life as an adult is very boring...lol.

I will never forget the time when Jamie came home for his first visit once he was actually finally at his first assignment in the Marines. He was up at Quantico and had a 72 hour pass. He didnt have a car yet but one of his buddies was going down to SC to visit his parents so he dropped Jamie at our house and would come back and pick him up on their way home. Marines are good that way.

Anyway, Jamie was sitting in the living room with us and he had been gone almost a year at this point and we had seen him maybe twice...his boot camp graduation and then when graduated from a part they do at Camp Lejeune right after boot camp. Then we didnt see him again till that visit in November. Well...he told us that he had no idea why he was in such a hurry to grow up. Being an adult sure wasnt what everyone said it was cracked up to be. He wished he could go back to being a kid again because that was a heck of a lot more fun. Then he sort of looked around the room and house, leaned back in the chair and sighed. He looked at us and said...but you know mom and dad, I can never come home again. This will always be my childhood home but now I have to find my grownup home and this simply cant be it. It was a somewhat teary moment but obviously he was the only one we launched correctly. With the help of the Marines!

[gcvmom]

Thanks everyone

I'm doing better today. I try to detach, I try to not get too stuck on a particular vision I have for my kids, but like any parent, it hurts to see them fail and I find myself panicking over all the what-ifs. Not good.

We've implemented a strict homework check policy and taken away all video/hand held game choices which were HUGE distractions for all three kids. They only get a limited amount of time on them AFTER I've signed off on their planner/work being completed. As predicted, PC is the one having the hardest time with this, but that's just tough beans for her.

The boys are not complaining a bit and have lined up very well to follow the new rules, but it's only been one night so we've got a long road ahead of us. But it was nice to see Gfg1 set his alarm (FINALLY) and actually get up to take his meds on his own yesterday morning. He's sick now, though and had a harder time getting up today -- only went in for 1st period and called me to bring him home. Looks like he's got DH's nasty cold (which turned into bronchitis and sinus infection for DH). It's always something.

I'm not going to bother with all the SAT garbage. At this point, it will mean more stress and more money, neither of which I can afford. But I AM going to look into summer school for Gfg1 and told him so. I got an exasperated sigh, but that's it. He seems resigned to the fact that he dropped the ball and these are the consequences he's earned. So that's a good step, I think.

One day at a time...

[susiestar]

VERY good update!! Good for you!

[TerryJ2]

Pity parties are worthwhile sometimes. Go for it! Get it out of your system (believe it or not, it will pass ... I'm living proof) and then move on and crack down, as others have said.
I totally hear you about gfg1. Sounds so much like my gfg. He could sell ice cubes to Eskimos. The only thing that has gotten us over his lying is to force him to re-do any missing assignment, NOW. Doesn't matter if it's done 3X and he eventually finds them all stuffed in his locker. It's his responsiblity to turn them in and if he doesn't, he has to redo them. He has fits, he yells, he swears, he gets in my face. I make him do it anyway. That's what a Warrior Mom does.
I agree w/the others, cut off the money, video games, whatever he uses the most and loves the most so that you get his attention. His attention will not be pretty, so be prepared for him to yell that he hates you. A lot.
I am so sorry about gfg2's issues in school w/the moron teachers. I read that on the general board and get so frustrated, I could fly through the screen. I tend to call mtngs so often that the teachers get sick of it, so it's either deal w/me at another mtng, or do keep gfg after school and make sure he gets his work done. (After school works much better for them. )
I am so happy that your DH's med change is working. Fingers crossed!

[buddy]

Great update... I wonder if pc will just settle in... probably the hardest as you said because in past really she hadn't needed so many interventions. You did an amazing job... would be a role model on that bald psychologists show, LOL

Hope they get in a better school work pattern. And hopefully the rewards from improved grades and self satisfaction will make them do this all independently (ok not holding my breath, but it is a nice dream)