Good vibes needed. GF broke up with GFG. GFG reached out to H...+

[Signorina]

Nothing to report - but it's the FIRST time that gfg has reached out...

and he told H that "nothing is working out for him" and "he has a lot of thinking to do"

and of course "don't tell mom" LE SIGH

I know it's not much but it's a FIRST...

and H has a (shhhhhh) second job interview tomorrow...

you know that feeling of when you pray and pray and pray and pray and you get SILENCE? That's been me for the last 4 years...and now all of a sudden CRASH and the winds of change are blowing. Of course I am very fearful that this glimmer of hope (on both fronts) will be answered by the "winds of change" blowing a door slam shut in my face (and we know I haven't had good luck with the wind)

Against my better judgment I have allowed hope and joyous anticipation to warm my heart - and I know it's premature...

so - I would love a little juju

[pasajes4]

Allow yourself a moment of joy because he is feeling the pinch of his choices and does not like the way it feels. It is a start.

[Nancy]

That would-be wonderful if it's true. I'm sending all the good vibes I have. This may be the starting point he needs to come back. Also keeping all body parts crossed for h.

It's time you got good news, you've patiently waited for him to come to his senses.

Nancy

[recoveringenabler]

Sending you every bit of ju ju I can muster, warm wishes for the breezes of change to lighten your heart and blow all your sadness and hurt far away and bring in a new era for your son and your family.

[InsaneCdn]

Sig... I know that feeling well. When you're walking through a tunnel, sometimes you don't know if the light you see is the "light at the end of the tunnel"... or the headlight of an on-coming train!

But... given that you have TWO glimmers? Sending whatever I can muster that at least ONE door brings some sunlight.

[AmericanGirl]

Sig...you got juju and everything else I can send you. I'm grateful and so happy - it is a start.

[Calamity Jane]

OH boy! I'm crossing everything I have for you!

[SuZir]

I hope he will choose road to better and not to worse in this crossroad!

Loosing a girlfriend because of his failures can be a thing that wakes him up.

[upallnight]

Sending some god ju-ju your way!

[Signorina]

So, no real news to report. H had lunch with him today. Apparently, his gf visited major university w/ her best friend (who attends it) for a few days. Came home, broke up with gfg, told him she was transferring to said big university in January and told him he could spend the night but he had to leave in the morning. She woke him up at 6am and said "get out." I am guessing it's another guy, C'est la vie

He told H he just wants to get back to his college town. Has a pt job lined up at a big warehouse where they DO drug test. :-) Apparently his boss owes him LOTS of back pay - he just wants to collect it and move on. Had a hard time making July rent bc his boss hasn't paid him. Not sure what to believe. I know his boss, in the past he was paid regularly but I also know that business is bad. I know that he paid gfg cash in July for an out of town job they did for the boss's brother. So...I am guessing gfg is paying rent LAST and fun first. And that "when he comes back to town next summer" he will work for someone else. So, he has no desire to change his patterns. If he can be successful and get a good job in college town - he should stay there next summer. Work and take classes while paying his 12 month lease. He is so out of touch with the real world.

His plan is to demand the back pay from his boss, go up to college town get settled in the apartment, pay his back tuition and re-enroll in school. H reiterated that he might just want to stay in town and take the opportunity to wipe the slate clean and get back on his feet- but he just kept repeating that he wants to get out of here and go back to college town. H told him it sounded like he was running away and I guess gfg bristled a bit so H dropped it.

Frankly, he hasn't grown up a bit. Nothing is changed. As I heard H reporting his responses, I could see gfg sitting at our patio table (8/2011) telling us he "just wanted to make his own decisions" before he stormed out. Same words he gave us when he left both times in January. Same old song. Same dance. Doesn't seem to connect that "HIS decisions" are the reason his life is so screwed up. And doesn't seem to have a plan for fixing them. He is totally unrealistic. IF he can come up with the $6000 to re-enroll AND they accept him, he will need a 3.6 GPA to bring his current 1.4 GPA up to a 2.0 so that he can remain enrolled. If getting a 3.6 GPA is NO PROBLEM, how did he end up with a 1.4???

OK -so I need to stop typing. I am ranting here when I want to rant at him. At least not ranting at him is some sort of progress.

I just guess I thought that there would be some sort of looking inward. NADA. He has just added his formerly beloved boss and beloved (ex) girlfriend to the list of people (H and me) responsible for holding him back. At the least, I guess it's nice to have company on that list.

He absolutely did not want to hear any advice or entertain the idea of coming home. Didn't ask for money either.


You know the saying: Insanity=doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results...