cleaned gfg's drawers out and found

[Jena]

a drawing, on it had a girl on one side that was titled "the people at my school Pretty" had little girl drawn on it with earrings, dress,etc.

other side of paper "me ugly" you can guess what that little girl looked like. Also the pic of the little girl was quite heavy.

So, gfg draws alot, her pics are often of happy things, i felt wow even thru her darkest times she is still drawing like this. their a bit more toned down when she isn't happy.

Obviously gfg draws and hides stuff. this is I think a recent picture. So, I know this is due to her illness her self image the way it is, yet should I write the makers of seroquel a letter as well to thank them for the extra twelve pounds on gfg that is adding to her wonderful self image?? better yet send them a copy of the pic?

I get alot of drugs come with side effects, yet i have to go again this weekend and get more clothes. its' aggrivating and i feel terrible that she still sees herself this way. it's very saddening.

[Big Bad Kitty]

SO much of this is society. Who says 12 extra # on a girl makes you ugly? Why, Barbie and the Bratz and Paris Hilton. Little girls are inundated with images of what they SHOULD look like. Tink, who is petite and very pretty, thinks that she is not pretty unless she is wearing a ton of makeup and fancy clothes. It's just not fair.

Hugs to your GFG, being an adolescent stinks.

[Wiped Out]

I agree with BBK. I hate the images the media sends out on what is beautiful especially for girls! I'm sorry your daughter is dealing with this. Gentle hugs to her (and you to).

[Andy]

Very sad that the young girls are even thinking about this! I was watching a group of kids last month when two fourth graders came to me asking to go to the bathroom because they wanted to see what their hair looked like - it may have gotten messed up as they played!

We try hard to teach our children not to judge others, but they still judge themselves.

[Jena]

I completely agree with the fact that it is largely due to our society, the "way" one should look etc.

Yet, lets' face it, it was that way when I was a kid and that was long ago. It is what it is. With that being said she is uncomfortable at the weight she is currently at, her stomach is growing by the minute as well.

She went from average weight to boom suddenly due to seroquel.

[Running_for_the_shelter]

My son has been on two drugs that put weight on him. He hated it. One time he was 5 years old, one time he was 7. I can't say it's all "society" and advertising that does it. The sudden weight gain messes with childrens' heads, even in the absence of societal pressure. No one would ever have called my son "fat" even with the extra pounds he put on (there were much fatter children in his class), but he knew how his body usually looked and this was just ugly to him. In neither case was there a clear and absolute benefit to the drugs, so we pulled him off them. If his behavior had drastically (heck, even moderately) improved, it might have been a different story, though. No one knows what the side effects are going to be for any particular child. One child may put on a lot of weight; others put on none. You don't know until you try. Manufacturers would love it if drugs had no side effect, but biology isn't like that. You have my sympathy on this -- every time my son made reference to being fat or grabbed his belly fat, it hurt. Good luck!

[Jena]

aw thanks. yes it is rough, i'm sorry yours had to go thru it also. my gfg tends to be able to go depressive quite easily so one change in her features, look throws it all off. She's also very very tall, her little feet are now a size 7 1/2 can you imagine and she'll be ten next mos.

so, wow what to do? i don't know. calling doc this week again to discuss options. I was waiting for it to slow down yet it hasn't we just keep on growing. that pic though broke my heart to see how she hurts inside over herself. btw, without the increase in weight she tends to view herself this way on and off. so add the weight increase and boom. just seeing that little pic what must of been going thru that little mind at the time.

i just keep on plugging your beautiful, pointing out her talents, etc.

[Kjs]

Does not only affect girls. Gfg has always thought he was fat. Even when he weighed 90 pounds a year ago. Now he is at 137 and totally upset. If anyone says anything about weight it sets him off. Hoping soon he will shoot up and not look or feel so bad.

It is so hard to keep these kids self esteem up, when they deal with so many issues day in and day out. You feel so bad because they deal with so much more than PC's.
I know I sometimes forget this because I am just so fed up with him that I just lose it myself. But when I am not home and away from him I feel so bad for him.

Atleast she is drawing and getting her feelings down. My gfg won't draw(hates it). Won't write, type or talk when he is feeling bad. Hope she feels better about herself.

[Jena]

kjs - i'm sorry to hear you go through this as well. I hate to hear he isn't getting it out somehow, it's harder for boys maybe to express themselves?? I like the fact "she" is getting it out somehow yet how does one deal with it when it's out?? Therapy i guess, in therapy.

It is hard to keep their spirits high, trying to convince them their ok, their strong, capable, etc. I try the best I can to work on her existing talents, she's too smart so if I try to pull upon the whole oh your beautiful, blah blah she's like ma your saying that cause your my mom. lol

It is society to an extent, btw I love the new commercials for Hanes with the full figured woman i think tha'ts great. I'm tired of society pushing thin, thin, after a while it gets sickening. At the end of the day as long as you are happy with who you are it doesn't matter what you weigh. Yet for most of us our gfg's aren't happy with the continued weight increase due to meds. it's like their struggling with the illness than ontop of it they have to handle the after effect and emotions that the side effects bring.

it's like a little merry go round. i too lose it sometimes, and i feel badly. I guess we too are just human and cannot expect perfection from ourselves, our job's as parents, caregivers, therapists, nurses, parent advocates, shesh we are so many things wrapped up into one!!!!

[TerryJ2]

Aw, poor thing. It makes me want to hug her.