Lost my cool

[TeDo]

Gfg1 is being difficult today. Arguing over the dumbest little things and not wanting to do ANYTHING but watch tv. I finally lost it...a yelling match ensued....I even resorted to spanking him....NONE of which makes me feel very good right now. WHY do I resort "the familiar" when I get REALLY get stressed? I hate repeating any of what my mother did so this REALLY bothers me.

I feel bad for gfg1 at the same time. I know his only having 8 hours of sleep is the culprit since he is used to getting closer to 11. He woke up way too early today. Right now, I made him go back upstairs INTO his bed to take a "nap". I am hoping he will actually sleep.

In the meantime, I hate when things go this haywire. I hate the monster I become when I'm pushed WAY beyond my limit. I hate what that does to him. I hate what it does to me. AND I hate that gfg2 is around for any of it.

Thanks for listening.

[InsaneCdn]

{{hugs}}
BTDT.
It's no fun.

[keista]

((hugs))

[buddy]

Oh my dear, you are not a monster. You lost your patience and I agree, that feels awful. I doubt many here would say they have not had moments they really regret while parenting. And I would bet, that compared to parents of TT's you make far fewer mistakes since this is on your mind all of the time. Is he on break this week? Will it screw him up for next week if he is allowed to watch tv more while on his break? (weather here is ugly, how is it down there??) Q does ok with that, I can say this is a special one time thing and he monitors that pretty well (knocking wood, this will probably all fall apart now, LOL).

I really beat myself up over my bad mommy moments. But I have also worked hard on moving past them quickly. I know the only thing that helps is to just check myself and see what I can do better next time. As long as I am trying my best to overcome, I give myself a break. You have the added pressure of wanting not to do what you experienced. I can only imagine the mixed up emotions that come along with times like that. But rest assured, you are not your mother and he does not experience what you experienced.

I hope he takes a nap and by the time he gets up that you have a plan in mind for how to schedule his day. As for GFG2, can you talk to him about it? Just let him know that you understand that is not fun, but you are going to try to problem solve it and just reassure him that it is all going to be OK?

HUGS to you, still wishing we were closer so we could just drive away for a break now and then.....Call me if you want! Q is still sleeping, can you believe it? I knew he was tired too. Sleep is not a good thing to miss. Really messes them up.

[JJJ]

(((hugs)))

[TeDo]

Buddy, we have Spring break next week. He adjusts pretty well to the schedule changes. It's just that last night was one of those unusual nights where he couldn't get to sleep until gfg2 got home (went to a different town to the movie with his Big Brother) so it was late and he was up earlier than usual. Him getting up too early happens at least once every week or two but we usually counteract that by keeping a fairly early bedtime every night.

It may not have been "right" but I did go upstairs and apologize to him for going overboard. I wanted him to realize that even I make mistakes and even I will apologize when I was wrong and that he needs to forgive others like he expects everyone to forgive him. It was a good conversation but I know he won't EVER let it go. It will be thrown back at me many times over the rest of my lifetime.

[Bunny]

We've all lost our cool at one point or another and I doubt that anyone here would say that you are a monster for doing it I look at it like falling off the wagon. You have to pick yourself up and start over again. I hope he takes a nap for you.

[InsaneCdn]

It may not have been "right" but I did go upstairs and apologize to him for going overboard. I wanted him to realize that even I make mistakes and even I will apologize when I was wrong

Of course you do this.
You just turned your problem, into a learning opportunity.
I've had to do that, too.

[Ktllc]

We have ALL btdt. We have limits too and I don't think you should feel ashamed of it. Hugs.

[buddy]

Buddy, we have Spring break next week. He adjusts pretty well to the schedule changes. It's just that last night was one of those unusual nights where he couldn't get to sleep until gfg2 got home (went to a different town to the movie with his Big Brother) so it was late and he was up earlier than usual. Him getting up too early happens at least once every week or two but we usually counteract that by keeping a fairly early bedtime every night.

It may not have been "right" but I did go upstairs and apologize to him for going overboard. I wanted him to realize that even I make mistakes and even I will apologize when I was wrong and that he needs to forgive others like he expects everyone to forgive him. It was a good conversation but I know he won't EVER let it go. It will be thrown back at me many times over the rest of my lifetime.

and THIS is why you never need to worry about being your mother, <<genuine smile>>. Q holds me accountable for every little thing I have ever done wrong too but that is ok...I just remind him we all make mistakes and it is a good thing we can forgive each other.

You are a really great mom.