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to this, most loving, community.

A long recovered heroin addict, mom I know reminded me recently that the 100% sobriety, in-program, buy-in, is not what “recovery” has to look like. She said many times you just “get the person,” (which is in itself new) and the change is revealed like the layers of an onion.

You are a wonderful advocate. Your daughter is lucky.

Copa I’m so sorry to hear this. You aren’t a loser. You’re a mother. I sentence you to one Hail Mary so you can be done with the self flogging. You didn’t set him up for this or set him back. My only thought is this. If you prop him up he’s not the crumpled mess that he may only be capable...

Thank you. Believe me, my days are still full of pangs. Like phantom pains from battle scars. Ugly, but still they could be proud reminders of what we’ve done and not done out of love and hope ... if only they didn’t hurt so f’ing much. I’m just trying to let it be part of me now, not because...

There’s been some high profile coverage of borderline lately. Pete Davidson (Ariana Grande/SNL) admitted his diagnosis. Some of the articles suggested that for people diagnosed young there is a high rate of “remission” over 5 and 10 years. I mention it in case having a pop culture model would...

I think the tough part for us is not living in their moment, but living in ours.

Sending my love and strength too. I’ve been trying to practice living, rather than living despite my son — and I’m here far less often trying to work things out. But this place really is the best of humanity and you are a big part of that. You’ve been a model for acceptance and hope at tbe...

That’s an amazing thing you’re trying to grow out of this experience. Pls share links as you move forward.

English was not my mom’s first language, but she occasionally shared surprising wisdoms. She said to me once “Regret, is the poison of life.” That has really stuck with me. But another time, my mom told me my dad was at the hospital getting an “autopsy,” when she meant a “biopsy” (of a...

I went to a 70s party a few years ago and wanted to take myself back with scents. I found Jean Nate, and Love’s Baby Soft on eBay. (tell, me you didn’t just imagine it) If I could only find “Tickle” . . . I would roll that giant slimy orb in my armpit just for old times sake

What beautiful news to come across. I would imagine that all the choices you put him to felt risky and unknown, even when you knew there were few choices left, that weren’t enabling. And now he’s been introduced to all this support and knowledge and he’s owning it. I’m so, so glad for all...

My daughter didn’t want to go by the lobster tank at a grocers. Because she was afraid of the “monsters.” I laughed and so, no honey they’re not “monsters,” they’re “lobsters” Next time we went, she pulled me away from the tank saying “No mommy, I’m still afraid of the ‘mobsters’.” All...

When I would help my mom cook she would say “You can always add more but you can’t add less”

Ive let life and restarting a career wash over me these last couple of months and I’ve been grateful for the emotional reprieve. I’m taking a break from the troubles. I would not have been able to had I not spent the time here with you all and if I didn’t know this safe place is always here...

Your hands are really full. And we shouldn’t have to be WebMDs but there is a lot of research and discussions about bipolar medications. Being informed will help you ask the right questions about his medications and any possible changes

Hi. I can very much relate to those pangs of pain thinking about how my son is stuck while other young people have acted on their hopes. The only thing that has made iit easier is being around other parents of difficult children, through this forum, parent al-anon and support groups. It...

Thank you for reminding me. My ideal self in this situation is not overly fearful, is commonsensical, assumes that he wants to break out of his skull sized hell — and lets him know I can help when he’s ready but am always rooting for him, regardless. I’m not always there but it feels like...

I also think a discussion with the Mom would be a good idea. As much as it would be tempting to tell her where she and her daughter can go, I think it would be more effective to keep it to facts that cop would find cold and hard as well. Your son is a drug addict. They are the audience for...

Wow. What good signs. —rooting for him and your family