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It really did feel like that, from pretty much the beginning of when I became involved. Once they realized there was not any immediate family problems (just in the past with his mom, which he was unwilling to discuss) that were leading to the issues, they really just continually pass the buck...

I completely agree with the entire first paragraph. It has been amazing for us to watch this process, because if we had done the same thing at his age, there would have been severe consequences, but he has managed to not have to take responsibility for anything that he has done beyond what we...

Well, that has been a big, unanswered question. We really don't know what is going to happen to him when he turns 18. The facility that he is currently in only holds them until they're 18, but he has been declared competent so I'm not sure if that means that they are just going to release him...

I haven't posted in awhile, but I feel like I need the support of this community right now. My very problematic stepson (still not sure on diagnosis exactly, but something like high functioning autism as well as a cluster B personality disorder similar to antisocial personality disorder), who is...

I completely understand where you are. I came into my stepsons life when he was 9 years old, but a lot of the behaviors you describe are very similar. He is now sixteen and no longer in our house because it got so bad that we had to give up custody and he is now living in a facility for minors...

That is what we ended up doing. The psychiatric ward that he was on actually told us that not picking him up was an option since they knew we had exhausted all other resources, but just asked that we give them warning if we were going to choose to do that. We actually didn't even end up doing...

Oops the system autocorrected Auditory Processing Disorders (APD)! I meant ASPD. Sorry I didn't catch that in time!

I don't have a lot to add in terms of suggestions, but I went through the same thing with my partner and his son. I repeatedly told doctors that I believed he had both autism and some type of psychiatric disorder (likely Auditory Processing Disorders (APD) in my opinion) because of my experience working with a range of people...

I'm late to the party, but I am so glad to see you here! I went through the same thing with my partner's child, though it was me he was watching dress. He had all of the other issues mentioned and then some. At first my partner made the same excuses, until it escalated to the point where his...

Thank you. It all still feels like a whirlwind. Like I should be celebrating, but I'm just waiting for the other shoe to drop. And yes, it's really hard to argue that the parents haven't done enough or that the child just needs some basic talk therapy when you hand them five pages of...

I haven't posted anything in quite a while because we were going through a particularly horrific period with all of this and it was difficult enough just keeping track of all of the court dates and details. Last I had posted, we were the impression that both of my stepson's parents were being...

This is so our experience as well. Nothing helps.

I've been there a few times! Absolutely no position is comfortable. I do not envy you that one! I'm glad it passed. :-) Let's hope it doesn't come back.

My stepson has this issue with food as well (and the inability to trust him with anything connected to the Internet), to the point where his psychiatrist referred to it as a "food addiction." We had to lock absolutely every door in this house except for his bedroom and one bathroom. He would...

Thanks for the welcome! That sure is a lot of familiar behavior, though thankfully we didn't deal with any drug abuse when he was actually living with us. It's a miracle, really, because he has a highly addictive personality and, like you notice with your son, a complete lack of empathy or...

We really do need armor and swords! The level of incompetence just continues to amaze me. Thank you so much for the link to the Parent Report. I think I will start working on that tomorrow to try to pull everything together. There has been so much over the last five years that it's hard to pull...

It sounds like you are absolutely right, Susie. His father's lawyer that was assigned to help him finally gotten in touch with us. Thankfully we have been collecting what paperwork we can get access to for quite a while now. After reading over the recent paperwork, I also found out that his...

What a horrible situation. I have totally been there, where you are counting the days, waiting for something to happen, hoping that it will go a certain way. My heart goes out to you, and I wish you much strength over the next few weeks!

About a week ago, my stepson was made a ward of the state when his biological parents signed over their rights after a series of uncontrolled, violent events that he has a racked up a number of criminal charges for. During the first few years of our relationship, my partner was involved in a...

I completely agree. Holidays feel especially weird this year with the kid gone and we do not feel at all prepared. I am an atheist pretty much, and it's always been about family to me. When I was away from my own family, it always felt very empty. I am grateful to be living closer to them, now...