I am at the end of my rope and needing some advice really badly. My daughter is 16 and a great kid she has never been in trouble at school other than for not doing the work. She had a hard time coping in school from day 1 and i had teachers telling me they thought there might be issues with her as far as her attention span and her ability to cope with things the other kids didnt have trouble with such as a kid chewing gum or eating she would get very frustrated and refuse to stay near them which she did at home also and we always let her eat in her room because the sound of anybody chewing pushed her over the edge.
[/FONT]That along with many other things that I sadly just thought was just jow she was and after a few yrs when she was in 4th grade the school decided to have a diagnostician test her for disability because she struggled so bad doing the work. They said she had a disability that was described as hand eye coordination disability which caused her to be able to say the answers and get them right but if she wrote it she got it wrong and she got answers wrong if she read it but right if read to her. They never mentioned IEP to me and I had never heard of one so after I was told about her Learning Disability (LD) I was told she would be put in classes with two teachers so she had more one on one which they did every year and her work load was cut in half so I assumed everything that they coukd do they were doing.
When she started 9th in high school she had scraped by to get there every year and she and I were both spent from yrs of struggling and I had fought her daily to get her there because she couldnt stand the enviroment it was everythng she cant cope with all together in one place. Her attendance wasnt good at all. I decided to get out of denial and take her to a Dr and he diagnosed her with adhd and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) but also social anxiety which he said he thought was her biggest issue. I spoke to her principal almost daily trying to figure a way to make it easier for her and he knew of her diagnoses which i assume is why he did try to help make it easier for her. He allowed her to sit in his office anytime she felt she couldnt handle a situation and gave her classes that she wanted things like that and as greatful as I was it didnt help and she really started having harder time plus became depressed because of it and she would tell me how she just dont belong there she cant do things the kids there can and she felt very bad about herself and begged to quit and get ged but I said no we werent giving up. Her Dr put her on homebound and a teacher dropped off her work twice a week and she was expected to do it all even though even in school she had to have a teacher help her to ever complete any work and my mother was dying so I wasnt able to help like she needed so when the work wasnt completed the principal said he cant keep her on homebound without work done so he stopped it. I then decided to say yes to ged since I was mentaly beat and still busy with my mom and she didnt return to school. After a month the school called to say the law in Mo. Where we live had changed a month ago to 17 the legal age to quit school and since shes 16 they said they had to report her to juv court truant. We had to go to court and even though I had told the juv officer about her disabilities they werent mentioned in court and no I had no lawyer because I didnt think I needed one or that it would be a problem since they could see her records and why she was truant but no records were looked at. They put her on probation and ordered she attend an alternative school as they called it thats 45 min from our home and ran by DCFS. I was told it was a place she can get ged thats a school that focuses on ged but there was no openings so she was ordered to return to her school until there be an opening. She went the next day just to be told that because her Dr had sent a letter before saying she needed a partial schedule they had no available options for her and she couldnt return there. I had then asked I be allowed to homeschool her since probation rules stated if she wasnt in school of some form she would be sent to juv detention and the probation officer said she refused to do work on homebound she wont on homeschool but I convinced her I would be able to help her and she said ok to do until opening at the alt school the court ordered. The next day we were to go to a probation orientation and were 5 min late so they said we had to reschedule and the problem officer was visibly angry even though a wreck on hiway caused us to be 5 min late she didnt care and oddly she called next day saying have her in the school ordered by court tomorrow or your in contempt of court. I did research and found its not a school but a treatment facility for kids with behavior problems and it works by the child having to complete the program which involves community service and working in groups with the kids and trying to council each other and things like that and its a 8 hr day 5 day week and 2 saturdays a month. Not to mention there searched daily and cant have even a purse with them. I said no way can I put her there she cant cope in regular school and this place is everything she couldnt deal with in school wrapped together in one times ten and also its year round no summer breaks to add to everything else so I was charged with educational neglect and they filed a motion to have court give dcfs protective custody and ofcourse they did and even tho her Dr had sent a letter that somehow again never made it to the judge saying this place would not be good for her and giving her diagnoses and saying she would do best if homeschooled but I was ordered to put her in the placethey were told by a Dr would be not good for her. I took her as hard as it was but having dcfs tell me they would have a sherrif come get her and all 3 of my kids would be in foster care which 2 of my kids are honir students but would be put in foster care for educational neglect and juv officer threatening to put her in detention daily I had no choice. I found out there is not a kid in there that hasnt been arrested for a major crime and not one kid was in there for just not going to school like her and the director said to me that I shoukd tell my daughter dont associate with any kids there because there in there for pretty bad stuff. She has been in this place two weeks im driving her to and from daily 45 min each way because she cant ride a bus because her soc anxiety she never could be in small area with more than few people without breaking out in a sweat and freaking out but her juv officer said thats rediculus! I am trying to make them see this is putting her so far back and she is falling apart. Iv got no where they wont let her go anyplace but this so called school and I now have learned about IEP and it seems to me she got the treatment she would have if she had one but they just didnt do the paperwork i guess because the Special Education dpt of her school said they had no file for her and im not understanding why I wasnt told about the IEP and why she wasnt given that when she obviously qualified for all the things it would have done other than it being documented so she wouldnt have ever ended up in the court. Her principal knew all of her diagnoses I dont know why he let this happen. If anyone can tell me anything that can help me save my daughter from this system thats gonna destroy her I would love to hear it!!! Sorry to write a book I wanted to give as much info as I could in hopes of getting help.
[/FONT]That along with many other things that I sadly just thought was just jow she was and after a few yrs when she was in 4th grade the school decided to have a diagnostician test her for disability because she struggled so bad doing the work. They said she had a disability that was described as hand eye coordination disability which caused her to be able to say the answers and get them right but if she wrote it she got it wrong and she got answers wrong if she read it but right if read to her. They never mentioned IEP to me and I had never heard of one so after I was told about her Learning Disability (LD) I was told she would be put in classes with two teachers so she had more one on one which they did every year and her work load was cut in half so I assumed everything that they coukd do they were doing.
When she started 9th in high school she had scraped by to get there every year and she and I were both spent from yrs of struggling and I had fought her daily to get her there because she couldnt stand the enviroment it was everythng she cant cope with all together in one place. Her attendance wasnt good at all. I decided to get out of denial and take her to a Dr and he diagnosed her with adhd and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) but also social anxiety which he said he thought was her biggest issue. I spoke to her principal almost daily trying to figure a way to make it easier for her and he knew of her diagnoses which i assume is why he did try to help make it easier for her. He allowed her to sit in his office anytime she felt she couldnt handle a situation and gave her classes that she wanted things like that and as greatful as I was it didnt help and she really started having harder time plus became depressed because of it and she would tell me how she just dont belong there she cant do things the kids there can and she felt very bad about herself and begged to quit and get ged but I said no we werent giving up. Her Dr put her on homebound and a teacher dropped off her work twice a week and she was expected to do it all even though even in school she had to have a teacher help her to ever complete any work and my mother was dying so I wasnt able to help like she needed so when the work wasnt completed the principal said he cant keep her on homebound without work done so he stopped it. I then decided to say yes to ged since I was mentaly beat and still busy with my mom and she didnt return to school. After a month the school called to say the law in Mo. Where we live had changed a month ago to 17 the legal age to quit school and since shes 16 they said they had to report her to juv court truant. We had to go to court and even though I had told the juv officer about her disabilities they werent mentioned in court and no I had no lawyer because I didnt think I needed one or that it would be a problem since they could see her records and why she was truant but no records were looked at. They put her on probation and ordered she attend an alternative school as they called it thats 45 min from our home and ran by DCFS. I was told it was a place she can get ged thats a school that focuses on ged but there was no openings so she was ordered to return to her school until there be an opening. She went the next day just to be told that because her Dr had sent a letter before saying she needed a partial schedule they had no available options for her and she couldnt return there. I had then asked I be allowed to homeschool her since probation rules stated if she wasnt in school of some form she would be sent to juv detention and the probation officer said she refused to do work on homebound she wont on homeschool but I convinced her I would be able to help her and she said ok to do until opening at the alt school the court ordered. The next day we were to go to a probation orientation and were 5 min late so they said we had to reschedule and the problem officer was visibly angry even though a wreck on hiway caused us to be 5 min late she didnt care and oddly she called next day saying have her in the school ordered by court tomorrow or your in contempt of court. I did research and found its not a school but a treatment facility for kids with behavior problems and it works by the child having to complete the program which involves community service and working in groups with the kids and trying to council each other and things like that and its a 8 hr day 5 day week and 2 saturdays a month. Not to mention there searched daily and cant have even a purse with them. I said no way can I put her there she cant cope in regular school and this place is everything she couldnt deal with in school wrapped together in one times ten and also its year round no summer breaks to add to everything else so I was charged with educational neglect and they filed a motion to have court give dcfs protective custody and ofcourse they did and even tho her Dr had sent a letter that somehow again never made it to the judge saying this place would not be good for her and giving her diagnoses and saying she would do best if homeschooled but I was ordered to put her in the placethey were told by a Dr would be not good for her. I took her as hard as it was but having dcfs tell me they would have a sherrif come get her and all 3 of my kids would be in foster care which 2 of my kids are honir students but would be put in foster care for educational neglect and juv officer threatening to put her in detention daily I had no choice. I found out there is not a kid in there that hasnt been arrested for a major crime and not one kid was in there for just not going to school like her and the director said to me that I shoukd tell my daughter dont associate with any kids there because there in there for pretty bad stuff. She has been in this place two weeks im driving her to and from daily 45 min each way because she cant ride a bus because her soc anxiety she never could be in small area with more than few people without breaking out in a sweat and freaking out but her juv officer said thats rediculus! I am trying to make them see this is putting her so far back and she is falling apart. Iv got no where they wont let her go anyplace but this so called school and I now have learned about IEP and it seems to me she got the treatment she would have if she had one but they just didnt do the paperwork i guess because the Special Education dpt of her school said they had no file for her and im not understanding why I wasnt told about the IEP and why she wasnt given that when she obviously qualified for all the things it would have done other than it being documented so she wouldnt have ever ended up in the court. Her principal knew all of her diagnoses I dont know why he let this happen. If anyone can tell me anything that can help me save my daughter from this system thats gonna destroy her I would love to hear it!!! Sorry to write a book I wanted to give as much info as I could in hopes of getting help.
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