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23 year old son - I kicked him out when he was 18
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<blockquote data-quote="so ready to live" data-source="post: 693813" data-attributes="member: 20054"><p>Hi Sea66. You did the right thing-in capital letters. What more could you do? There is a line drawn over and over and when we look back rationally we wonder how we ever got to this place. Being afraid in our own homes...so difficult to see when we are mired in it. I know now, months later, how close I was to a nervous breakdown.</p><p></p><p> Your son functioning after military school proves he CAN do it, even if he doesn't want to. We had to realize this in a big way to understand (if anyone of us ever understands really) that our son chooses this lifestyle. It's easier to beg than work, easier to blame us, disabilities, the system or Mickey Mouse....everyone else's fault. Did you ever get up in the morning and go to work when you didn't want to because you needed paycheck and job? Of course, we all have. Except Dcs, they don't think they should have to do this. So...they also don't have to have the benefits, right? Their choice.</p><p>It sounds like you're making progress for YOU. </p><p></p><p>Keep saying no. We still do birthdays and Christmas but no other support and for the life of me, we can't find anything to give him that he can't turn into cash for alcohol or drugs. We would like to physically help our son as we do our other kids ie. moving, house projects, car repairs but we can't do that either because it turns into "buy it for me" sometimes with "I'll pay you back added" Another painful lie. </p><p>For you today, know that you are not alone. Read members postscripts. Often it gives a snapshot of lives lived...that's what we're all trying to do, just make it through. Glad you have joined, so sorry you had to. Hold tight, you know what's right, you are strong. Prayers.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="so ready to live, post: 693813, member: 20054"] Hi Sea66. You did the right thing-in capital letters. What more could you do? There is a line drawn over and over and when we look back rationally we wonder how we ever got to this place. Being afraid in our own homes...so difficult to see when we are mired in it. I know now, months later, how close I was to a nervous breakdown. Your son functioning after military school proves he CAN do it, even if he doesn't want to. We had to realize this in a big way to understand (if anyone of us ever understands really) that our son chooses this lifestyle. It's easier to beg than work, easier to blame us, disabilities, the system or Mickey Mouse....everyone else's fault. Did you ever get up in the morning and go to work when you didn't want to because you needed paycheck and job? Of course, we all have. Except Dcs, they don't think they should have to do this. So...they also don't have to have the benefits, right? Their choice. It sounds like you're making progress for YOU. Keep saying no. We still do birthdays and Christmas but no other support and for the life of me, we can't find anything to give him that he can't turn into cash for alcohol or drugs. We would like to physically help our son as we do our other kids ie. moving, house projects, car repairs but we can't do that either because it turns into "buy it for me" sometimes with "I'll pay you back added" Another painful lie. For you today, know that you are not alone. Read members postscripts. Often it gives a snapshot of lives lived...that's what we're all trying to do, just make it through. Glad you have joined, so sorry you had to. Hold tight, you know what's right, you are strong. Prayers. [/QUOTE]
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23 year old son - I kicked him out when he was 18
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