Hi all, Some googling led me to your forums, and I'm glad to have found my way here. I apologize in advance that this is sooooooo very long, but thanks for reading if you do! My 23 year old brother lives at home and is becoming an increasing burden on my parents (both in their 60s). My brother was always a quiet, timid kid growing up. Kept to himself, didn't make friends easily. Lots of social anxiety, even with family. He had some physical health concerns which kept him out of school sporadically in elementary school, but he also struggled with bouts of defiance with wanting to attend school (he was bullied a bit as well). By the time my brother hit high school, he was "checked out" of school. He grew increasingly defiant and would refuse to go to school. My mother accepted this as his grades were ok. He missed the majority of his senior year. No friends, no social interactions. It was around this time he began withdrawing at home. He began spending all waking hours in his room, glued to the tv or a video game. He would stay home from family functions and stay in his room during holidays. He'd eat meals alone in his bed. In his teenage years he began to be increasingly avoidant and defiant toward my father (avoiding him when he could, locking and slamming doors, telling him to basically F off). Then I went off to college. I'm 25 now, but I spent six years away, only to return for holidays and breaks. During this time, I only interacted with my brother a handful of times. When I was home and not working, he'd be up all night playing games and sleep all day (honestly I wonder if this has been an avoidance tactic). Over the course of six years, I've seen what appears to be extreme social anxiety worsen and cripple my sibling. I now live on my own and only hear reports of how things are going. My brother still spends all night watching films/playing games. He has one friend he met gaming (only social interaction) who now lives in a group home 30 miles away. My brother has never held a job nor held a desire to work. He writes fanfic and tells my mom he is waiting on a break to start his career as a writer. He has never driven and has no desire to learn, hence my mom drives him wherever he wants to go. He refuses to speak to my father and will hide from him. He will text my mom or pound on the walls of his bedroom until the rattling gets her attention and he essentially receives room service. He refuses to eat my mother's dinner and will special request dinners of his choice. As he does not work, he receive allowance, which he blows online buying trinkets and dvds (he will not go to the store). He exhibits strong signs of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and has great difficulty verbalizing thoughts or needs, and is prone to "manic" behaviors when upset (not violence, just screaming and talking to himself irrationally). This past summer, physical health concerns arose and my brother blurted out to a nurse at the family doctors that he was mentally ill, had self labeled himself as autistic, and needed help to function. This got him counseling. He loved going, until the doctor diagnosed him with severe anxiety and depression and prescribed medications. My brother panicked, stormed out of the office and told my mom he would never go see a counselor again. Which, my mom, has respected. So obviously this is a very messy picture. Both parents appear to walk on eggshells around him. My father has accepted his son has this extreme anxiety toward him and avoids his son, and my mother coddles and caters to his every demand. This is heartbreaking, as I know this is all they can do. They don't know what else to do. Countless conversations with both my parents on this matter suggest a growing feeling of defeat. Since the counseling, my mother has been pursuing SSI benefits, to get him a diagnosis and help/support he needs. Unfortunately, her claim was denied last month. I came over for Christmas and saw first hand how much this is dragging on my aging parents. I just feel as lost as they do. I'm not immediately in the picture, but I'm hoping to gain insight and help my folks through this.