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General Parenting
3 year old on Tenex!?
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 683775" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>My grand daughter is a sensitive child who cries easily and has trouble with self regulation. She is sweet as pie but can be difficult. Both her parents adore her but they know that strictness will only make her react more. I am concerned that your daughter's step father doesn't love or like your daughter. She is a baby and needs this man to love her. It is not ok, just because she is not his biological child, for your husband not to be able to offer her the male love every child needs. I have one biological child and three adopted and love them equally.</p><p>.</p><p>I would be loathe to put a three year old on any medications. Its a personal decision.</p><p></p><p>in my opinion if your husband doesnt love this difficult baby who will probably need special handling and parental understanding, the marriage will not be smooth. Perhaps he and you need counseling too?</p><p></p><p>I highly recommend reading "the explosive child" by ross greene to start understanding your dear dsughter better. And in my opinion your husband should read it too.</p><p></p><p>Is her father still in her life? Who diagnosed your daughter? Only a psychiatrist or neuropsychologist are legally allowed to test, evaluate and diagnose. There are other options for more thorough diagnoses too, but early diagnoses tend to evolve and change with age.</p><p></p><p>Early interventions in my opinion are more helpful than therapy at age three. Do you find it helpful? Many young children who are differently wired do not respond to typical behavioral therapy, such as time outs. Often this only makes behavior more intense.</p><p></p><p>I hope your husband doesnt use spanking on your daughter. If it were me. Id forbid it. That will only make her act out and feel worse.. it doesn't work.</p><p></p><p>Your daughter is different, but different isnt bad and she cant help it and please dont call her "bad girl." She isnt. And that is as useless, making her feel bad, as it is to spank.</p><p></p><p></p><p>You are important too. I hope your husband is kind to you and respects what you say and listens. We all deserve that from our spouse.</p><p>Sorry you have to be here.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 683775, member: 1550"] My grand daughter is a sensitive child who cries easily and has trouble with self regulation. She is sweet as pie but can be difficult. Both her parents adore her but they know that strictness will only make her react more. I am concerned that your daughter's step father doesn't love or like your daughter. She is a baby and needs this man to love her. It is not ok, just because she is not his biological child, for your husband not to be able to offer her the male love every child needs. I have one biological child and three adopted and love them equally. . I would be loathe to put a three year old on any medications. Its a personal decision. in my opinion if your husband doesnt love this difficult baby who will probably need special handling and parental understanding, the marriage will not be smooth. Perhaps he and you need counseling too? I highly recommend reading "the explosive child" by ross greene to start understanding your dear dsughter better. And in my opinion your husband should read it too. Is her father still in her life? Who diagnosed your daughter? Only a psychiatrist or neuropsychologist are legally allowed to test, evaluate and diagnose. There are other options for more thorough diagnoses too, but early diagnoses tend to evolve and change with age. Early interventions in my opinion are more helpful than therapy at age three. Do you find it helpful? Many young children who are differently wired do not respond to typical behavioral therapy, such as time outs. Often this only makes behavior more intense. I hope your husband doesnt use spanking on your daughter. If it were me. Id forbid it. That will only make her act out and feel worse.. it doesn't work. Your daughter is different, but different isnt bad and she cant help it and please dont call her "bad girl." She isnt. And that is as useless, making her feel bad, as it is to spank. You are important too. I hope your husband is kind to you and respects what you say and listens. We all deserve that from our spouse. Sorry you have to be here. [/QUOTE]
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