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Parent Emeritus
30 Year Old BiPolar Daughter Going Downhill (again)
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 712768" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>Welcome Denise. </p><p></p><p>My first response to your story is do <em><u>not</u></em> allow your daughter to live with you. You deserve a peaceful life and you know from experience, your daughter will bring to your life what she lives in hers, chaos, dysfunction, manipulation, anger and violence. I'm so sorry, I know how devastating it is. </p><p></p><p>The article on detachment is at the bottom of my post here. I hope it helps.</p><p></p><p>You may also try contacting NAMI, the National Alliance on Mental Illness. You can connect with them online, they have chapters in many cities. They have excellent parent courses and they may offer resources for your daughter. They may have housing options for her. Otherwise, there are likely local shelters.</p><p></p><p>Put yourself as the priority and make sure you get your needs met. </p><p></p><p>My daughter is similar to yours and like you, I have had to learn how to detach from her lifestyle choices and accept what I cannot fix, change, or control. It has been difficult, very difficult.......however, I have learned that it is doable. For me, each issue prompted a choice on my part, it is a process of letting go, it is progressive, we have to learn a new way to respond which puts our own needs first. </p><p></p><p>Where you are right now is an important point of choice.....and a hard one.....but in your heart of hearts, you know what the appropriate response is......<em>but that doesn't mean it makes it any easier. </em></p><p></p><p>Hang in there. Keep posting, it helps. Seek support. Keep yourself in very supportive atmospheres as you move thru this time, you'll need the support to stay strong. I'm glad you're here with us.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 712768, member: 13542"] Welcome Denise. My first response to your story is do [I][U]not[/U][/I] allow your daughter to live with you. You deserve a peaceful life and you know from experience, your daughter will bring to your life what she lives in hers, chaos, dysfunction, manipulation, anger and violence. I'm so sorry, I know how devastating it is. The article on detachment is at the bottom of my post here. I hope it helps. You may also try contacting NAMI, the National Alliance on Mental Illness. You can connect with them online, they have chapters in many cities. They have excellent parent courses and they may offer resources for your daughter. They may have housing options for her. Otherwise, there are likely local shelters. Put yourself as the priority and make sure you get your needs met. My daughter is similar to yours and like you, I have had to learn how to detach from her lifestyle choices and accept what I cannot fix, change, or control. It has been difficult, very difficult.......however, I have learned that it is doable. For me, each issue prompted a choice on my part, it is a process of letting go, it is progressive, we have to learn a new way to respond which puts our own needs first. Where you are right now is an important point of choice.....and a hard one.....but in your heart of hearts, you know what the appropriate response is......[I]but that doesn't mean it makes it any easier. [/I] Hang in there. Keep posting, it helps. Seek support. Keep yourself in very supportive atmospheres as you move thru this time, you'll need the support to stay strong. I'm glad you're here with us. [/QUOTE]
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30 Year Old BiPolar Daughter Going Downhill (again)
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