I'm new to this forum, and after having read lots of messages with interest, I want to pick your brains about my 4 yr old daughter. I don't want to take her to a doctor yet, as I don't want a wrong diagnosis, and more importantly don't want her to feel there is something wrong with her - when there isn't. I am conscious of the fact that maybe doctors diagnose and label young children too quickly when they're "borderline". But some of her behaviour has been troubling me for some time. I keep thinking that this could just be normal behaviour for more "hyper" kids - maybe she's "borderline" if you know what I mean. So maybe someone can relate to what I'm saying, and maybe help me out. First I'll point out the negative behaviours: Started having major tantrums at 15 mths old. Would throw herself on the floor banging her head. This would happen if things didn't go her way. She stopped this when she was about 2 yrs old. Her sister was then born. She was extremely jealous - would hit the baby. Hence I couldn't leave them in the same room for one second! Shy when meeting new people - would sometimes shout when she felt uncomfortable in situations. Especially in big groups like playgroups or in a room where there's people she didn't know. I think this is the way she handled it - she couldn't manage her emotions. Now at 4 yrs old, she wouldn't do this as much, but would shout quietly to herself - like she was uncomfortable. However this wouldn't happen all the time. Was very active since she started walking at 1 yr old - she would constantly climb the furniture, bang into everything. She still is active - she has a lot of energy - loves dancing. I can't say that she has all the ADHD symptoms. I think she has a good attention span - she would sit down and play with her toys and loves to be read to. Some of the symptoms she would have like being hyperactive - but then it's not a daily pattern. If she eats anything containing sugar, she's "wired to to the moon" - you can see the change in her movement and face. She goes absolutely beserk. Therefore I don't give her any sweets or chocolates - only a rare treat of children's Milk Button chocolates which don't contain too much sugar. Now, these are the only negative behaviour, but when these happen, it's very worrying and embarrasing for me, especially in public. Now the positive aspects: Started talking at 2 yr old - few sentences. She was always "advanced" for her age - I think she's very intelligent - she can read people's actions and minds very well, and then plays up on it. She went to pre-school at 2 yr 9 mths, and at school, apparently she was perfect. She would behave quite normally. The teachers didn't voice any concerns. It's only when I was around that she would display these behaviours. The only thing that could have contributed is that maybe this could be jealousy towards her little sister, who had my attention. Now at 4 yr old, she goes to pre-school everyday, but I haven't heard anything negative from the teachers. They say that she sometimes doesn't listen, but they didn't seem too concerned. She has friends who she plays with and plays well, but when things don't go her way, she can get aggressive and shout a lot. She's not very nice and caring to her sister who's 2 yrs old - this is worrying. She can be perfect one minute, but then horrible the next. Sorry this is so long, but I wonder whether there's an underlying problem - or just borderline? I don't want to talk about it to the other mums, as I don't want to isolate ourselves from people. But I also want some opinions and advice to this situation. Hopefully someone can help me..... thanks.