I have to say that for the most part, the school has been completely willing to go with all of the recommendations of our therapist regarding accommodations. However, I have noticed that PE class is a nightmare for difficult child 1. She cannot make it through that class with-o getting upset about something or another. She feels kids cheat and the teacher does nothing. She gets mad at people for not kicking the ball to her or whatever during a game, "it's not fair" when the other kids get away with something or another, yadda yadda yadda. So, as we were finalizing the 504 plan, I asked for some type of accommodation to be made regarding PE class and they said no. I've dropped it for now, but I can say that is the one thing that I know is a trigger for problems for my difficult child 1 (getting angry at classmates usually). Has anyone else dealt with an issue like this? I need to figure out what exactly I can ask them to do for us next year. Hopefully by then, we're going to be at a better place with-emotional stability, but I need to have a plan, Know what I mean??
504 Accommodations re: PE class?
- Thread starter IT1967
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TeDo
CD Hall of Fame
difficult child 1 especially is very "rule bound" and has a strong sense of "fair". It is a part of his disability. He needed to be actively taught that his version of fair isn't always the accepted version of fair. That and the fact that not many people can AIM a kickball, etc were tough for him to "get". The only thing I can see that might help your difficult child is that they provide someone during that class to "talk her through it" and/or counseling to actively teach her that life itself is NEVER going to be fair. She's going to have to learn ways to deal with all the "unfairness" she is going to encounter for the rest of her life.
HaoZi... yes, that's one of the "options".
We've also had medical exemption from PE - doesn't work if your ed system requires a HS PE class to graduate, but it saved us for a few years.
I've seen cases where the child is in Occupational Therapist (OT) and/or PT, and the school counts THAT as PE.
We've also had medical exemption from PE - doesn't work if your ed system requires a HS PE class to graduate, but it saved us for a few years.
I've seen cases where the child is in Occupational Therapist (OT) and/or PT, and the school counts THAT as PE.
confuzzled
Member
maybe the therapist would support you in asking for adaptive phys.ed for sensory/anxiety/make up an issue insert here...
gym IS a nightmare for many of our kids.
gym IS a nightmare for many of our kids.
L
Liahona
Guest
difficult child 1's current school doesn't make him take it. To many issues. Elementary school had pe very structured for him. Plus there was someone there to help him with social situations.
Is there a way an aide of some sort can be in there with difficult child? He can "earn" tokens for playing and not reacting, then after about 5 minutes he can get his reward for 2 minutes (bring a timer). The reward can be a book or a toy of his choice for those 2 minutes.Then difficult child will go back to the activity and "earn the reward" again....keep repeating. As time goes on, it will take more time to earn each token, but start off with him earning those tokens quickly. In this way he is motivated to practice playing with others in gym.
That's the goal, playing appropriately with his peers. I think it would be a huge disservice to have him just opt out. He really needs to learn to interact in settings like gym, it's the life skills he needs more than anything.
That's the goal, playing appropriately with his peers. I think it would be a huge disservice to have him just opt out. He really needs to learn to interact in settings like gym, it's the life skills he needs more than anything.
Very interesting. difficult child 1 is in 4th grade going into 5th next year. She will be going to a middle school next year. As usual, your responses are so enlightening. Thank you! I have to laugh a little because most of the accommodations really aren't going to make much of a difference for her, with the exception of her not having to take timed tests. So, the one that I really feel is important they blow off. Ugh. I hate the idea of her giving up any chance for physical activity, but something happens literally every gym class.
TeDo, how did you teach your child that their version of "fair" isn't necessarily so? I constantly am trying to explain to difficult child 1 that life is a constant back and forth. Maybe one day something goes your way, maybe the next it doesn't. In this instance, for example, I've explained that it's not her place to worry about if the other kids cheated or not, and that it's the teacher's problem. It's in one ear and out the other. Blah. Nothing I've said or done so far has made a bit of difference in her thinking.
TeDo, how did you teach your child that their version of "fair" isn't necessarily so? I constantly am trying to explain to difficult child 1 that life is a constant back and forth. Maybe one day something goes your way, maybe the next it doesn't. In this instance, for example, I've explained that it's not her place to worry about if the other kids cheated or not, and that it's the teacher's problem. It's in one ear and out the other. Blah. Nothing I've said or done so far has made a bit of difference in her thinking.
TeDo
CD Hall of Fame
It took saying "life isn't fair and it's never going to be fair so you're gonna have to learn to live with it" over and over and over and over ...get the picture? I also tell him about things that are unfair in MY life WHEN they happen, especially when he is present. For example, we were heading for a check-out line in WalMart. We saw this woman coming to the same line but when she saw us, she practically ran to get there before us. When difficult child 1 started complaining about the woman "budging", I simply said "yea, well, someday she's going to either end up at the end of a VERY long line or she's doing to fall and break a bone. No big deal. I'm not in THAT much of a hurry." It wasn't "fair" and I let him see it from MY point of view so he could learn that there are other perspectives. Get the idea? We still have problems like that come up once in a while, but for the most part, it's better.
by the way, the WalMart lady ended up having to wait to get out of the parking lot because a truck with a trailer was waiting at the end of her aisle (she was behind it trying to get out) to turn after a bunch of cars went by....one of which was ours. LOL I pointed her out to difficult child 1 and explained the irony then we both laughed hysterically. It solidified my point in THAT situation.
by the way, the WalMart lady ended up having to wait to get out of the parking lot because a truck with a trailer was waiting at the end of her aisle (she was behind it trying to get out) to turn after a bunch of cars went by....one of which was ours. LOL I pointed her out to difficult child 1 and explained the irony then we both laughed hysterically. It solidified my point in THAT situation.
Tiapet
Old Hand
Something to consider if middle school is next year, will need to dress out. I encountered this with my difficult child. He would not. Part of it was fear of bullying real and imagined (he did get bullied) the other was self consciousness. I managed to get him an accommodation where he does not have to change in locker room. We first attempted for him to change in the bathroom in the locker room. That still didn't work for him as it kept him "in" the locker room. It ended up that he changed in another bathroom outside the locker room. Just a thought for consideration. Mine is also rule bound but we didn't encounter too many problems in PE with it.
buddy
New Member
In terms of the cheating issue and others like that, Q was taught early in first grade by a teacher which "jobs" were his, which were hers, which were other kids', etc. We used that word at home too. At this point he will tell me that it's not my job..or he has other words now like not my business.
Example: it's the teachers job to fix that problem.
Not that he doesn't still cross boundaries but we have words and a learned concept that help get past it quicker.
(that teacher would put specific teacher jobs/ kid jobs in picture/written form daily)
Example: it's the teachers job to fix that problem.
Not that he doesn't still cross boundaries but we have words and a learned concept that help get past it quicker.
(that teacher would put specific teacher jobs/ kid jobs in picture/written form daily)
HaoZi
CD Hall of Fame
I just kept saying "You worry about YOU, when they get out in the world and they're still stupid because they cheated, that's on them and not your worry now or then." One of her testing accommodations (for the big state tests anyway) is to test separately and with no time restrictions, this also seems to help because she's not seeing the other kids or paying attention to them.
I *always* say those same things to difficult child 1! I always tell her that it's the gym teacher's problem if kids cheat and NOT hers. I do that all the time whenever this kind of thing crops up - and it crops up alot, lol. I've also explained many times whose job is whose. for example, whenever she's complaining about difficult child 2, I'll say, you worry about YOU, I'm the parent and it's my job to deal with-difficult child 2. It's interesting how similar some of these issues are for all of our difficult child's, huh? (see the difficult child trait post!) At least I'm on the right track, I guess.
HaoZi
CD Hall of Fame
Yep. You just have to keep repeating it, or finding new ways to express it, until difficult child finally gets it and lets it go. And it still may crop up time to time afterwards anyway in one form or another. I know life isn't fair, and karma isn't fast, but ^$*^$(*$ I still get ticked off a LOT, so I can't blame my difficult child for feeling the same. I can only direct her in how to act about it. Validating their feelings about the unfairness does help.
