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Substance Abuse
8 weeks ago she was my daughter...I feel like I dont know her now
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<blockquote data-quote="ksm" data-source="post: 705776" data-attributes="member: 12511"><p>I feel like we have her twin! My daughter (adopted granddaughter) had a similar off/on relationship with a real creep for over two years. She had snuck out of her room during the night, the police found her at his house when we reported her missing. Rinse/repeat... Two different times the court had a no contact order for 6 months each time.</p><p></p><p>It seems like more professional help us being offered your daughter than we got. She also had an intake assessment, and to deflect the situation she made veiled threats of suicide. She had a 3 day stay at a place almost 200 miles away. I don't think she or us had any help from them.</p><p></p><p>She did get a case manager that met with her, social services (CPS) got involved, but changed workers often. We found a psychologist 60 miles away that was a good fit, but still the drama kept going.</p><p></p><p>I seriously want to lock her up at home! But she dismantled the window alarms the first month they were installed!</p><p></p><p>Things are better...but she still struggles with anxiety and depression, and olso ODD. I believe there are attachment issues, probably caused by an addictive mom when she was an infant, and a year in foster care before she and her siblings placed with us. Then her older brother placed with his bio dad. </p><p></p><p>Here is what we are doing now...when she goes out, she HAS to have her location finder on. We both have an app and I can see where she is. If she turns it off or says her phone is dead, she is grounded.</p><p></p><p>I can tell you that the boy needs to be warned by you or the police. In our state I could not press charges unless my 14yo requested it and signed off on it. Even though the state law that the age for sexual consent is age 16!! We only got the 6 month no contact order because the guys probation officer made it part of his probation requirement! He did go to jail for a couple of days. </p><p></p><p>Her boyfriend is a master manipulator. In the last year, she has closed out her savings account, and he got the funds... Over $500 she had saved from her part time job.</p><p></p><p>You should get your daughter to her family doctor or OB/GYN immediately. Maybe see if it is too late for the morning after pill...usual best taken in a couple of days. She needs to be checked for STDs. Mine has battled a bacterial vaginosis that keeps coming back. Not a reportable STD, but still a pain. I don't know how much I have paid in copays and medications, and psychiatric appts. She needs to be on a reliable form of BC. Also, I put a box of condoms in their bathroom. I told them I was not ok with them being sexually active, but I was not ok with STDs and pregnancy either.</p><p></p><p>Did your daughter get screened for drug use when intake? Mine did and it showed she was smoking pot. Things progress to other drugs. It is never as minimal as your child will want you to believe.</p><p></p><p>Come to this site often...it keeps me sane! Well, "saner". </p><p></p><p>KSM</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="ksm, post: 705776, member: 12511"] I feel like we have her twin! My daughter (adopted granddaughter) had a similar off/on relationship with a real creep for over two years. She had snuck out of her room during the night, the police found her at his house when we reported her missing. Rinse/repeat... Two different times the court had a no contact order for 6 months each time. It seems like more professional help us being offered your daughter than we got. She also had an intake assessment, and to deflect the situation she made veiled threats of suicide. She had a 3 day stay at a place almost 200 miles away. I don't think she or us had any help from them. She did get a case manager that met with her, social services (CPS) got involved, but changed workers often. We found a psychologist 60 miles away that was a good fit, but still the drama kept going. I seriously want to lock her up at home! But she dismantled the window alarms the first month they were installed! Things are better...but she still struggles with anxiety and depression, and olso ODD. I believe there are attachment issues, probably caused by an addictive mom when she was an infant, and a year in foster care before she and her siblings placed with us. Then her older brother placed with his bio dad. Here is what we are doing now...when she goes out, she HAS to have her location finder on. We both have an app and I can see where she is. If she turns it off or says her phone is dead, she is grounded. I can tell you that the boy needs to be warned by you or the police. In our state I could not press charges unless my 14yo requested it and signed off on it. Even though the state law that the age for sexual consent is age 16!! We only got the 6 month no contact order because the guys probation officer made it part of his probation requirement! He did go to jail for a couple of days. Her boyfriend is a master manipulator. In the last year, she has closed out her savings account, and he got the funds... Over $500 she had saved from her part time job. You should get your daughter to her family doctor or OB/GYN immediately. Maybe see if it is too late for the morning after pill...usual best taken in a couple of days. She needs to be checked for STDs. Mine has battled a bacterial vaginosis that keeps coming back. Not a reportable STD, but still a pain. I don't know how much I have paid in copays and medications, and psychiatric appts. She needs to be on a reliable form of BC. Also, I put a box of condoms in their bathroom. I told them I was not ok with them being sexually active, but I was not ok with STDs and pregnancy either. Did your daughter get screened for drug use when intake? Mine did and it showed she was smoking pot. Things progress to other drugs. It is never as minimal as your child will want you to believe. Come to this site often...it keeps me sane! Well, "saner". KSM [/QUOTE]
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8 weeks ago she was my daughter...I feel like I dont know her now
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