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Parent Emeritus
A big step for difficult child and me
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<blockquote data-quote="firehorsewoman" data-source="post: 625760" data-attributes="member: 15804"><p>I agree with you that this seems to be her plan all along. That in jail she found her own sense of peace and belonging and some sort of order to her life...a place where she is forced into that sense of order and does not have the freedom to make the same bad choices she seems compelled to make on the outside. As twisted as this may seem to some, I think that this may be a healthy sign for your difficult child, sort of a protection mechanism for her. A way for her to find order. Lots of folks join the military for the same reason. I hope that she gets what she needs while there.</p><p></p><p>You made the best decision for the cats. All of this turmoil is not good for them. At least the police department didn't send them to a municipal shelter as is often the case when pet owners are arrested. That would have been an additional hassle for you. It is good that they let you pick them up directly.</p><p></p><p>Even from reading the first sentence of your latest post, I knew you would be okay. You are different now. You are not going to melt over this kind of stuff ever again. I can just sense it. </p><p></p><p>For me with my difficult child mother, I just desensitized over the years. The crazy, illegal, outlandish, disruptive, nasty, aggressive behaviors on her part started to get less and less reaction from me. I remember detaching from it all feeling so good. Eighteen years ago was the last time I saw my mother face to face and there were police involved in our situation as well. I just thought to myself, "This is the last time." And it was. </p><p>My sisters never desensitized nor detached. Sadly, they continue to be negatively affected by her.</p><p></p><p>I am right there with you trying to remain centered. </p><p></p><p>Enjoy the beauty and excitement of your granddaughter's prom!</p><p>hugs,</p><p>FHW</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="firehorsewoman, post: 625760, member: 15804"] I agree with you that this seems to be her plan all along. That in jail she found her own sense of peace and belonging and some sort of order to her life...a place where she is forced into that sense of order and does not have the freedom to make the same bad choices she seems compelled to make on the outside. As twisted as this may seem to some, I think that this may be a healthy sign for your difficult child, sort of a protection mechanism for her. A way for her to find order. Lots of folks join the military for the same reason. I hope that she gets what she needs while there. You made the best decision for the cats. All of this turmoil is not good for them. At least the police department didn't send them to a municipal shelter as is often the case when pet owners are arrested. That would have been an additional hassle for you. It is good that they let you pick them up directly. Even from reading the first sentence of your latest post, I knew you would be okay. You are different now. You are not going to melt over this kind of stuff ever again. I can just sense it. For me with my difficult child mother, I just desensitized over the years. The crazy, illegal, outlandish, disruptive, nasty, aggressive behaviors on her part started to get less and less reaction from me. I remember detaching from it all feeling so good. Eighteen years ago was the last time I saw my mother face to face and there were police involved in our situation as well. I just thought to myself, "This is the last time." And it was. My sisters never desensitized nor detached. Sadly, they continue to be negatively affected by her. I am right there with you trying to remain centered. Enjoy the beauty and excitement of your granddaughter's prom! hugs, FHW [/QUOTE]
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A big step for difficult child and me
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