A bit of good news .... hopeful, but waiting for the danged other shoe to drop....

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by dashcat, May 27, 2010.

  1. dashcat

    dashcat Member

    difficult child and her internet true love broke up yesterday. He lives about 12 hours away and they've only seen one another in person for a weekend in Feb. This, after a three week online courtship. Sigh.

    Her pattern is to be "in love", marriage plans, etc ... Current guy is always "the one". Her therapist (and her friends and her MOMMA) have been asking her to take a break and work on her. But this is the pattern: Within 48 hours of one breakup, she manages to get into another "relationship". 48 hours is the max and this has been the pattern for about four years.

    She's very creative at finding them with free online dating sites as her new favorite.

    So far, she's been lucky., but I worrry about real danger. Finding Mr Goodbar. Her computer isn't working now and she's using mine. I've told her she cannot go on dating sites in my home. If she wishes to do that, she can find another place to live. At 18 there is no reason to be trolling Plenty of Fish. She should be out in the world meeting actual people. I do check her history and I think she's being honest about this one. I check her phone records, too, so an odd number coming up from, say, Texas, would be a clue. She'll be knocked off the computer if she does this. I worry about her bringing strangers in my home - mostly for her, but for myself as well.

    Her whole focus since leaving college was to be back in North Carolina with this dude. Maybe, just maybe, she'll work on having her own life. Maybe, just maybe, she'll meet an actual person in REAL LIFE and enjoy his company. Maybe her life will no longer be Facebook.

    Cross your fingers, everyone. Ding, dong,the dude is dead! (well, you know what I mean...)
  2. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Sending best wishes that she's able to focus a little more on her and not so much on the 'prize'. I hate when I see young women wasting their youth chasing men...I know a couple of girls like that!
  3. dashcat

    dashcat Member

    Thanks, hearts. Yes, I hate it, too and she's been doing this since she was 12. The online stuff is recent, but scary. The "other shoe" part is my fear that she'll just attach herself to someone else right away. I think it's common in difficult child land to worry about that danged other shoe!