A husband scenario...am I taking this all wrong?

[Shari]

My patience walked away at about noon today, so I need some outside input on this.

The conversation with husband is ongoing. Possibly getting somewhere, we will see. However I still have a LOT of things we haven't even touched on yet to hash out with him. Kids and house have been the only topics hit.

My blood sugar tanked at noon today, and I got extremely grumpy. I guess the good part is that I am very aware of it, so I don't think I took it out on anyway, but it never really recovered fully.

Watching a shooting competition tonight. husband was talking about wanting to get involved. I am thinking "cool, we can do this together, the whole family" Then I ask if he intends to use his mule.

No. When I get my horse and cgfg's horse goinig, he's going to use the horse that I've been riding to shoot this past year. The horse that cgfg was riding prior to getting her horse. The horse that I figured out is over 30 years old, and I got cgfg a horse because we were retiring this one...

I"m angry because I think this is another example of his hidden agenda, do whatever he wants regardless of anyone else BS. I spent a lot of money to buy a horse to replace that horse that he has no intention of retiring.

Or am I just being grumpy.

 

[flutterby]

Nope, not being grumpy.

 

[gcvmom]

What is he thinking? Is he just going to ride the poor creature into the ground the way he rides vehicles into the ground? Didja ask him what he's smokin'?

 

[trinityroyal]

Nope, not being grumpy at all.

 

[KTMom91]

No, you're not grumpy.

 

[hearts and roses]

No, you're not being grumpy! He's being an inconsiderate turd! Again! And what an awful way to treat a beloved old animal~

 

[totoro]

Not grumpy-
he should go hang out in the pasture with that poor old horse. smoking his hay.... LOL

 

[susiestar]

I think you are about as FAR from grumpy as it is possible to be on this subjec. What husband wants to do isn't just PA, it is inhumane, cruel, and disgusting. At 30 years old the poor horse deserves to be retired - NOT used by a man who is so irresponsible that he cannot even pick up after himself to the point that he has left a rotting dear head sitting around for more than a year.

He very well may be taking the tack that if he just says what you want to hear and does a little bit of work to a fairly low standard, then you "can't" tell him that he can't use the poor old horse, your vehicles, or any other thing he dang well wants to use.

This is a sickening thing for him to do - ESPECIALLY when he wants to use this horse as part of letting his cgfg daughter learn to shoot when she shows not one teeny bit of responsibility for anything.

I would be pitching such a fit that your husband would be saying/doing EXACTLY what I wanted because (in the words of my father) "Mother can have anything she wants when she levitates - regardless of whether her head is spinning around and spewing pea soup!"

Personally I would be equally upset about the animal abuse and the idea that husband would take his daughter shooting because I would be quite positive that he would NOT supervise her on or off of the shooting range. He simply doesn't seem to have the discipline to follow safe shooting rules and gun maintenance rules, much less to make sure his daughter would follow them. Having husband and cgfg join you in mounted shooting would mean that you had to supervise ALL of them during YOUR hobby/fun time.

 

[Shari]

Its too late for cfg and shooting, as I already let her participate, and I enjoy doing so. Wee participates, also, and I really do enjoy watching the kids learn and be a part of the group.

But I did sit her down the other night and tell her my game plan for this school year.

When it comes time to go do something fun (and face it folks, I'm the fun one around here), it will be her school work that decides if she joins me. If she wants to go to Florida with us in the winter, her work will be done and turned in. If its not, its not even an option. Beyond that, I'm out of the school loop. I don't CARE if her work is done or not. She can not do a single assignment this year, and she won't hear from me. If she wants help, I'll be glad to help her, but she has to ask. Beyond that, I'm done. But if you're going with me, here's my expectations.

If she wants to hang out with me, her actions will indicate as such and she will dress and apply makeup in a manner fitting to where we are goiing, or I will leave her at home. Lie to me? You'll be left. Lie about school. YOu'll be left. Make up awful stories about your mom? You'll be left. Wear trashy ho clothes and makeup? You'll be left.

I am not telling her what to do anymore. I'm just telling what she has to do in order to do anything with me. We'll see how this flies.

As for husband and the horse, tho....I've had to let that one go for a bit. I have to get thru tomorrow. Then, hopefully, I can get back to the rest of my life.

 

[TerryJ2]

{{hugs}}