Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
A new path for difficult child and I......
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="nlj" data-source="post: 639984" data-attributes="member: 17650"><p>It's peaceful isn't it RE? This sort of 'not-caring but still caring' thing that we do. Some days I have to convince myself that I'm still there, in the chilled-out detached place with the straight jacket that prevents me jumping in my car and driving off to rescue him. Some nights I lie awake and think of him cold, wet and smelly, and I have to get up and read some threads on this site before I can go back to bed with any hope of oblivion. Acceptance is so much better than that other strangling state of mind that shouts "help help" in your ear at all hours of the day and night though. My son was supposed to come and stay last week but it didn't happen. It was my birthday yesterday and I got a text from an unknown phone asking me to phone him back. He sounded down, very cold, fallen out with everyone at the squat, lonely, expecting to be evicted soon. I said "you chose this life, it must be hard especially at this time of year, why have you fallen out with everyone? what options do you have?" That was the wrong thing to say. I knew it was wrong as I was saying it. I should have said "That sounds tough but I'm sure you'll figure it all out". He says he hasn't got any options. I gave a mental shrug. He wanted me to accept his lifestyle and I've accepted it. I can't change him, I can't rescue him, I can just love him and hope he continues to survive and doesn't go further downhill. Like you say RE, they're resourceful and strong to be able to live the lives they've chosen. I just wish that all this resoucefulness and strength was put to better use. But we love them and accept them and that's a big improvement on the alternatives.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="nlj, post: 639984, member: 17650"] It's peaceful isn't it RE? This sort of 'not-caring but still caring' thing that we do. Some days I have to convince myself that I'm still there, in the chilled-out detached place with the straight jacket that prevents me jumping in my car and driving off to rescue him. Some nights I lie awake and think of him cold, wet and smelly, and I have to get up and read some threads on this site before I can go back to bed with any hope of oblivion. Acceptance is so much better than that other strangling state of mind that shouts "help help" in your ear at all hours of the day and night though. My son was supposed to come and stay last week but it didn't happen. It was my birthday yesterday and I got a text from an unknown phone asking me to phone him back. He sounded down, very cold, fallen out with everyone at the squat, lonely, expecting to be evicted soon. I said "you chose this life, it must be hard especially at this time of year, why have you fallen out with everyone? what options do you have?" That was the wrong thing to say. I knew it was wrong as I was saying it. I should have said "That sounds tough but I'm sure you'll figure it all out". He says he hasn't got any options. I gave a mental shrug. He wanted me to accept his lifestyle and I've accepted it. I can't change him, I can't rescue him, I can just love him and hope he continues to survive and doesn't go further downhill. Like you say RE, they're resourceful and strong to be able to live the lives they've chosen. I just wish that all this resoucefulness and strength was put to better use. But we love them and accept them and that's a big improvement on the alternatives. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
A new path for difficult child and I......
Top