timer lady
Queen of Hearts
kt has been displaying more difficult & "confusing" behaviors than normal of late. We are seeing psychiatrist tomorrow & I asked school staff to expand on their concerns. Several times during the email they expressed concerns about my being able to parent kt. Several times the comment "since she has come home" was inserted.
There were several suggestions that kt be hospitalized. Please let me know what you think before I send this. Thanks.
A,
Thank you for your recent email regarding kt's behaviors at school. First I would like to offer you and your staff a well known quote:
If you always do what you always did, you'll always get what you always got.
When something stops working something else needs to replace it. You have to find kt's currency, if you will.
Your description of kt's behavior issues confuses me. It's no different than kt a few years ago or even three months ago. The idea that coming home is causing her negative behaviors to increase is somewhat insulting. There are anniversaries for kt that are not pleasant along with her placement here with my late husband and myself.
And being an attachment disordered child I would expect no less than manipulation or triangulation even after all these years of therapy and interventions I would be scared if I saw different at this stage of the game.
Parenting kt has always been a matter of creative thinking. While I know that you are trying to teach her academics along with what is accepted in the community, it comes down to a matter of creativity with my daughter, as I'm sure it is with most of the students there.
From kt's take on the matter, she doesn't feel manic; she is feeling depressed. She's also frustrated that Mr. S continues to refuse to sign a contract because kt and another peer aren't ready to discuss a situation. I've not been filled in on the matter so I have no clue what the contract is all about.
Saying the above, I'm not sure the level drops or level increases mean anything to kt anymore. The school store isn't what it was even a year ago. School store, or levels mean little to a transitioning teenager; a teenager who is becoming a young adult even though emotionally she's much younger.
When an apology isn't accepted by a peer or an adult, there is little more kt can do.
I have always supported you & your staff will continue to do so. However, I wonder if certain of your staff's refusal to accept kt's expanding personality and independence isn't getting in the way. On top of that kt is experiencing actual dissociative states along with states of depersonalization. She has spent time working through memories of abuse. AND continues to do so.
As always I would like to thank you and your staff for all the work you continue to do with kt. You are making in incredible impact on her life.
Thank you,
There were several suggestions that kt be hospitalized. Please let me know what you think before I send this. Thanks.
A,
Thank you for your recent email regarding kt's behaviors at school. First I would like to offer you and your staff a well known quote:
If you always do what you always did, you'll always get what you always got.
When something stops working something else needs to replace it. You have to find kt's currency, if you will.
Your description of kt's behavior issues confuses me. It's no different than kt a few years ago or even three months ago. The idea that coming home is causing her negative behaviors to increase is somewhat insulting. There are anniversaries for kt that are not pleasant along with her placement here with my late husband and myself.
And being an attachment disordered child I would expect no less than manipulation or triangulation even after all these years of therapy and interventions I would be scared if I saw different at this stage of the game.
Parenting kt has always been a matter of creative thinking. While I know that you are trying to teach her academics along with what is accepted in the community, it comes down to a matter of creativity with my daughter, as I'm sure it is with most of the students there.
From kt's take on the matter, she doesn't feel manic; she is feeling depressed. She's also frustrated that Mr. S continues to refuse to sign a contract because kt and another peer aren't ready to discuss a situation. I've not been filled in on the matter so I have no clue what the contract is all about.
Saying the above, I'm not sure the level drops or level increases mean anything to kt anymore. The school store isn't what it was even a year ago. School store, or levels mean little to a transitioning teenager; a teenager who is becoming a young adult even though emotionally she's much younger.
When an apology isn't accepted by a peer or an adult, there is little more kt can do.
I have always supported you & your staff will continue to do so. However, I wonder if certain of your staff's refusal to accept kt's expanding personality and independence isn't getting in the way. On top of that kt is experiencing actual dissociative states along with states of depersonalization. She has spent time working through memories of abuse. AND continues to do so.
As always I would like to thank you and your staff for all the work you continue to do with kt. You are making in incredible impact on her life.
Thank you,
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