Haven't been here much lately. husband and I went to NYC for a 4 day holiday. It was very busy and a bit of a whirlwind but we saw a lot of sights, a couple of shows and it was good to get away. After we got back I took easy child for an overnight to a friends cottage. difficult child is no better - drinking, smoking and is back to cutting again. He broke up with his 'summer fling' after cheating on her twice with 2 different girls. He must be getting a fair amount of sex because he went through about a dozen condoms last month and now has a fresh supply - thank God for the public health department. He still has his job although he's not getting many hours and hates the work. Says he's going to get a job at the coffee shop where his friend works. Great - this friend is not a good influence at all. Now that he has a job I asked him to start paying his cell phone bill. Within hours of getting paid he spent 3/4 of his paycheque on clothes and hats. I found a receipt today that indicates he has spent the remainder of his paycheque on more clothes. Not sure where he's getting money for smokes and booze although my mom thinks he may have stolen some money from her when he stayed at their place. Can't be sure though because she doesn't remember exactly how much $$ she had. He's blown up at me twice this past week. Apparently he is losing friends because he is a 'slutty drunk' (his words). That is my fault because I make his life so miserable he needs to drink. Oh, ok. Everything is my fault. I make his life so miserable that he has to drink and smoke and cut himself. He'll tell me that one minute and then ask me why I'm upset because we've been getting along so well for the last month. Huh? He's all over the map again. Feels like he is on another downward spiral. Wanted to go into town on Saturday which is a good 15 minute drive so would be a very long walk and it was hot. I told him I'd drive him into town if he'd help me with some housework. No way. He is hardly ever here and all the mess belongs to me and easy child so why should he have to help. Even after I pointed out that I'd had to pick up banana peels, wrappers, etc. from the family room the other day he still wasn't going to help. So, I told him he could walk. He threatened to steal my bicycle to ride into town (his bike was left in town) so I told him I'd call police. I won't lend him my bike because he'll probably leave it somewhere and I may never see it again or the money to replace it. Anyway, I got told where to go, doors slammed, etc. and he left and didn't come home that night and wouldn't tell me when he was coming home. He came home last night when we were up at the trailer and left again this morning before we got home. Didn't text me to tell me where he was going or when he'd be back. Just no respect at all. I made it very clear to him that he WILL go to his therapy appointment and he WILL participate in it, he WILL go to the paediatrician on Saturday and he WILL go to the psychiatrist on Monday (13th). If he is prescribed medications he WILL take them. I must see improvements and I must see an effort on his part to improve or he will have to leave. We can't keep living like this and if he's not willing to work on it then he will have to move out. This is getting very hard on easy child and I hate to see her suffer because of him. We also put locks on our bedroom door and PCs bedroom door. His bedroom door will come off if he ever slams it again. He has been getting up in the middle of the night and snooping around the house looking for the cord for the wifi as well as the lighters and knives I keep confiscating from him. Not to mention he stole booze out of the liquor cabinet. I would imagine he snooped around most of the house last night. Doesn't look like he drank any alcohol unless he watered it down. It's all going up to my bedroom today. husband is worried that difficult child is going to give me a nervous breakdown. Honestly, so am I.