A work funny

[Abbey]

I have this guy who comes in every day. He's about 70 or so. He has the BEST sense of humor. We banter back and forth all the time.

I'm checking out another customer and I see him come in the door behind me. I hold up my index finger to the customer and said, "Just a minute please." I walk down my aisle, put my finger in his face and say, "Get out!! Right now!" He just turns and walks out the door. He just walked down to the other set of doors and gives me a wave as he walks in. I go back to my check station and she is looking at me with the most astonished face. I guess it really didn't look that good.

I tell her not to worry...he likes pushing my buttons so he gets some in return. Oh, and the braces on my wrists are when we got into a shoving match. Ha!

We were hugely busy. (Right before the Packer game.) Sometimes it slips by me to look up and see the sea of people. All of a sudden I hear...INCOMING!!! He's standing at the end of my belt and throwing his groceries at me. The first was a big roast. I caught it...amazingly. As I'm catching and scanning, I said, "What's good for the goose is good for the gander," and start tossing his groceries to the bagger. He got down to his dozen eggs...stopped...looked at them and said, "Aw, xxxx," and laid them on the belt. All the people around were laughing so hard. I looked at my bagger and said, you better be one hell of a catch and tossed the eggs. Not one broke, mind you.

I love old people with spririt.

He tried to buy a bottle of Whiskey the other day. I carded him. He laughed and said he wasn't going to give up the ID. Well...guess no booze for you. We both sat there with our arms crossed in a stare down. Well, I've got all day. I don't get off until 7pm. He says...I can wait. I'm retired. Then we both got the giggles. I was never really good at stare downs.

Got to have fun in a job.

Abbey

 

[mstang67chic]

I wanna shop in your store!!!!!

 

[Hound dog]

Thanks Abbey. I needed a laugh.

 

[Andy]

Gotta love your job! You have a great job. When I was working at Target two winter's ago for seasonal, the college age kids who worked there just looked as if I were nuts when I told them cashering was my hobby job. I love cashiering and if I didn't love my current job just as much, I would probably be cashiering. Some day when difficult child can be home alone late into the night I will return to that seasonal job.

 

[Jena]

Abbey

Your so funny........ I bet it is the highlight of his week and day the way you two banter back and forth like that.

Very cool

 

[Abbey]

Ok, TM...I've been scolded. I'll take some corner time.

Abbey

 

[Star*]

For a veggiesaurus you sure get a lot of meat thrown at you~!

 

[mrscatinthehat]

When I was in the grocery store the other day I thought of you (not in a bad way). I was having demo food lunch. But all of the demo ladies were so boring. I thought to myself now what would Deb do with this? I think it too when I am checking out and watch things go into bags that should never ever be bagged together. Arghhh. Glad you can have fun while you work.

beth

 

[Star*]

Okay since Beth brought it up - I'm going to tell my little grocery "weirdo" story.

YOU CAN NOT BAG MY GROCERIES........! PERIOD.

I don't care if you got an A++ in cashier school. I'm beyond 'whatever' for you to do it. I bag them in paper (I ABHORE plastic) but love to use paper to hold paper magazines and newspaper for recycling.

When I shop - I shop. I ALSO place my stuff on the conveyor belt IN A PARTICULAR order so that I don't spend $3.00 for a bag of chips LESS my coupons (thanks T) and end up with chip dust. I strategically place CANNED items first - First on the belt - FIRST in the bag - FIRST in the BOTTOM of my cart where they will NOT be smashed - then frozen stuff all together to KEEP my other stuff cold since it's a bit of a drive. Then boxed stuff that is in the right side of my cabinet - then cookies, cake mixes that are on the left. ALL SNACKS GO TOGETHER and YES - due to my sensitive sniffer if you package BOUNCE 5 dryer sheets with my bread - I'm bringing the bread back - (moron) Bread and eggs MAY be bagged together IF ----they are the last items......ALL soap together - come on people (clap clap) likes with likes!

I HATE IT with a ferverent passion when I put my stuff on the belt and the ditz of a cashier reaches over my food and grabs the bread that I placed AT THE END - ARGH.....NO NO NO WHY? WHY DID SHE DO THAT? IT WAS AT THE END = don't man handle my dough - just let it where it is. And if they sneeze? OVER my groceries - Another story - seriously - there is no lack of lysol in my house.

I have passed this craft on to my son - he is the most EXCELLENT bagger in the world. He knows the layout of my kitchen - and will bag accordingly if he's with me. Other wise - just allow me and my little recycled bags to do our thing.

Another peeve -???? When I spend 20 minutes picking out a cut of meat that I can just about afford and then the cashier scans it with her Count Dracula wanna be fingernails that are chipped, split and cracked and pokes her finger INTO my plastic wrap and then says "Hey Justin - go get another one of these - I poked a hole in it." UGH......NO JUSTIN don't go I will - and I'll be back in 20 .....because I'm anal."

And while I'm at it - DO NOT BAG MY MILK - It HAS a handle - and I use it. And no - I asked for PAPER - and you may NOT put the milk in a plastic bag because you want to be done with my order - heck - there are still eggs and a loaf of milk there - AND WHY DIDN"T that go in with the dairy to keep order?

I'm not out there - but it sure makes MY life easier when (HEY STOP LAUGHING I SAID I AM NOT OUT THERE) the groceries are in an order that I can put frozen and fridge stuff in the same bag away first - and et cetera.



Dont' even get me started about someone in a WM that puts Dish soap in with my socks......OMG - WHAT a travesty! NO SOAP WITH COTTON - Soap in this bag - SOCKS in that one. eesch

 

[Lothlorien]

No, no, Star...you aren't out there
Bwaha!

 

[Star*]

hey - I'm okay out 'there' because HERE I CAN BAG MY OWN FOOD.

and wear my socks N. E. way I want to.

(disclaimers are fantastic no?)

OMG really you mean I am the only person that is BOTHERED by unorganization at the checkout?

 

[Andy]

I'm with you Star. I also hate it when baggers don't know how to bag or worse they think they do. I did have a cashier do something totally stupid and try to explain to me why it was the correct thing to do. I so felt like calling her manager over and demanding who taught her. Details people details. The soap in with food thing is happening more and more!

But then I am also one who had to work real hard not spending my entire shopping time turning every single can on the shelf because the stocker has no clue of product presentation.

I think Star, Abby, and I should open our own grocery store. Talk about customer service - Everyone in town would be paying to get in the door. They will see everything without turning the cans around, they will enjoy our employees humour, and when they get home will LOVE to put away groceries without even knowing why it is so much easier.

 

[Star*]

(steps forward from the crowd gathered)

I'm Star - and I'm a lable facing front aholic.

-I got an excellent rating from my manger at my 45 day review. lol - one of my strenghts? ALWAYS MAKES SURE ITEMS ARE FRONT FACING WITH LABLES IN LINE.....yeh!

 

[trinityroyal]

Star, Andy, Abbey...can I work in your store? Please? Pretty please?

I am another Label-must-face-front-er, and a thou-shalt-bag-mine-groceries-as-I have-lain-them-out-er.

Yeesh! I have resorted to the bag-your-own or self checkout in recent years just to avoid blowing a gasket over this.

 

[Shari]

My house is in utter chaos right now. I am a good 2 weeks behind in chores, and not gaining ground quickly.
***
However, my pantry and my toolbox are never - and I mean NEVER - disordered. My cans are neatly stacked, labels forward, and sorted and grouped by type.
***
My housemates hate me.

 

[Abbey]

I, too, am a 'fronter.' When I don't have a customer I roam around my area facing front anything in site. One of the other checkers asked me what I was doing. Fronting. Why? They are just going to mess it up again. Well, I'm a tad anal about my work area.

I will have to say that our baggers are VERY good. Justin, bless his heart, has come a long way. They always ask about cleaners, how heavy they want to the bags, paper or plastic, etc. We also have half our lanes as U-bag so customers have a choice.

Today I hit a guy in the groin with a line seperator. I nearly died. I was on the ONLY lane that didn't have the end piece at the beginning of the lane. I finish an order and shove it on my rail so it goes back to the beginning...yeppers, he picked the wrong time to walk by. I was so embarrassed!! He just did a little 'dip and grab' and then laughed. I was probably 10 shades of red.

Abbey

 

[flutterbee]

Abbey - I'd love to shop at your store. The cashiers and baggers at mine are soooooooooo boring. Of course, they're all teenagers who act like they're being put out to have to scan my groceries...

Star - Are you *sure* that going through all that rigamaroo just to have the cashier and bagger botch it and you standing over them carrying on like a not out there crazy lady really makes your life easier?

*ducks and runs*

Just don't smoosh my bread. Nothing more frustrating than getting home to find my bread has been smooshed and then I have to go back to the store....

My cabinets would be all organized and pretty, too, if I didn't have these rotten kids living here. I finally gave up a couple of years ago. They'll move out one day - that's the plan, anyway - and I'll have my cabinets back.

 

[Andy]

Yes Trinity, You can work with us. For now, you can take Abbey's spot as head cashier while she takes a break for a "thou shalt not hit customers" refreasher course. Then you and Abbey can be co-head cashiers while Star and I take care of the product presentation.



Abbey, Business in your store has got to have risen since your arrival. You get a bonus and a raise.

Another thing that riles me - upside down cans - that is just wrong! I view that product as damaged.

 

[Abbey]

I actually took the day off yesterday because I was sick...stomach thing going on. I went into work and threw up just as I got off the bus. Nice, Deb. Fortunately no one was waiting at the stop! So, went in and told them, then hurried back out to catch the next bus back home. Waiting there was an elderly regular who recognized me. He said, "Going home already?" Yep...don't feel that well. "But I'm coming in later on today." Sorry...and I have the next two days off, just so you know.

Oh. And he pats me on the back. So I'm sitting there on the bus next to him green in the face having a nice conversation.

I love old people. Let me clarify. I love NICE old people.

So, whose going to front the money for this new store? At $7.50/hr I doubt I could pull that together.

Abbey

 

[mrscatinthehat]

We will get a grant to open the store. Yeah that is it.