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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 637468" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>To run in to his main abuser and responding the way he did, seems like an enormous leap in health and good choices. That leap is new for him so I can understand that he would want to be somewhere he feels relatively safe and loved as he moves through this transition he just made so dramatically into a new response. I get his reasons. </p><p></p><p>I can also so understand your vacillating between hope and what the past has brought to you. That is very real. It makes sense that you are all conflicted, this is new ground for all of you.</p><p></p><p>Rather then agree to 3-4 days, why not agree to today, each day, or not. Agree to sit down each day and talk about what is real and what you are willing to do and what you expect from one another.</p><p></p><p>Change is good and change has stress in it. Your son is likely reeling from the meeting and from his response. You are kind of in the some place, change. </p><p></p><p>While you're going through this, take care of yourself, change is good, change is stressful, both are true at the same time. Be kind to yourself.</p><p></p><p>What he did is something to be proud of. How you are responding is healthy. Good job.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 637468, member: 13542"] To run in to his main abuser and responding the way he did, seems like an enormous leap in health and good choices. That leap is new for him so I can understand that he would want to be somewhere he feels relatively safe and loved as he moves through this transition he just made so dramatically into a new response. I get his reasons. I can also so understand your vacillating between hope and what the past has brought to you. That is very real. It makes sense that you are all conflicted, this is new ground for all of you. Rather then agree to 3-4 days, why not agree to today, each day, or not. Agree to sit down each day and talk about what is real and what you are willing to do and what you expect from one another. Change is good and change has stress in it. Your son is likely reeling from the meeting and from his response. You are kind of in the some place, change. While you're going through this, take care of yourself, change is good, change is stressful, both are true at the same time. Be kind to yourself. What he did is something to be proud of. How you are responding is healthy. Good job. [/QUOTE]
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