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Parent Emeritus
...Aaaaand it just got worse
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<blockquote data-quote="Lil" data-source="post: 642604" data-attributes="member: 17309"><p>Okay...I'm going to not be popular, but I have been exactly in this position. My son, at 17, stole minor amounts...a bag of home improvement goods with the receipt still in...took them to the store and returned $25 worth, the rest was trashed. We found out, he left home, came back went to counseling, etc. Turned 18 between him doing and us finding. While in counseling and "working on the problems" he stole more, guitars, guns, archery equipment and pawned them. We got most back. In fact, he got the guns back and we only knew about them because of the case being missing from one. He went to college, flunked out, came back, we told him ONE MORE ITEM and we'll call the cops. He took almost $700 that was, yep, in the back of the closet in a jug. The betrayal and the violation of my privacy hurts more than the money.</p><p> </p><p>We did NOT call the police. #1, because cash is too hard to prove. #2, because it IS a felony and I just couldn't bear it. </p><p> </p><p>We DID make him pack his bags and get out.</p><p> </p><p>Your stepdaughter is 17. In my state (Missouri) that is an adult under criminal law and she would go to adult county jail and possibly adult prison. I could never do that to someone that age for stealing. If she is still a juvenile under criminal law...yes. I might very well call the police. Cooling her heels in juvie might be best. She's too young to put out of the house without you being responsible for her and possibly being charged for doing so. That darn 17/18 age is SO problematic. Too young to cut loose, too old to control. Perhaps you could call the juvenile officer in your area and talk to them. Ask them if there is anything that can be done thru the juvenile court system instead of thru the adult court system?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lil, post: 642604, member: 17309"] Okay...I'm going to not be popular, but I have been exactly in this position. My son, at 17, stole minor amounts...a bag of home improvement goods with the receipt still in...took them to the store and returned $25 worth, the rest was trashed. We found out, he left home, came back went to counseling, etc. Turned 18 between him doing and us finding. While in counseling and "working on the problems" he stole more, guitars, guns, archery equipment and pawned them. We got most back. In fact, he got the guns back and we only knew about them because of the case being missing from one. He went to college, flunked out, came back, we told him ONE MORE ITEM and we'll call the cops. He took almost $700 that was, yep, in the back of the closet in a jug. The betrayal and the violation of my privacy hurts more than the money. We did NOT call the police. #1, because cash is too hard to prove. #2, because it IS a felony and I just couldn't bear it. We DID make him pack his bags and get out. Your stepdaughter is 17. In my state (Missouri) that is an adult under criminal law and she would go to adult county jail and possibly adult prison. I could never do that to someone that age for stealing. If she is still a juvenile under criminal law...yes. I might very well call the police. Cooling her heels in juvie might be best. She's too young to put out of the house without you being responsible for her and possibly being charged for doing so. That darn 17/18 age is SO problematic. Too young to cut loose, too old to control. Perhaps you could call the juvenile officer in your area and talk to them. Ask them if there is anything that can be done thru the juvenile court system instead of thru the adult court system? [/QUOTE]
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...Aaaaand it just got worse
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