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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember1" data-source="post: 761487" data-attributes="member: 23706"><p>You know....a lot of the adoptive parents when I first came here, none whom I think of are here now, got very upset if I suggested adoption was part of the problem. So I kind of stopped. I get this. They wanted to think that their kids were not troubled because of genetics or drugs/alcohol in utero or a lower than average IQ. God help me. I DIDNT WANT TO THINK THIS EITHER!.Those issues to me meant a lack of hope.</p><p></p><p>I am a realist, not one who sees a half full or empty glass. I see what is there. I can't think that one day Kay will be able to take good care of herself and I can't even fool myself into thinking she loves us deep inside. Truthfully she actually can not live with us because she could maybe hurt us. And the only time she ever contacted us was for help or else we had to initiate the contact.</p><p></p><p>Kay only "loved" us when we gave her comfort or money. I read that often our troubled kids, not all adopted but troubled, are truly not interested in a relationship with us until they need something. Is that a real parent/child relationship? No! Yet we will do all we can to keep what we have....crumbs. And I am not sorry that we tried to help her, but so much pain went into it. And she is no better.</p><p></p><p>Well, I am fortunate that my connection to God is strong. I could not have done this without Him. And all of you.</p><p></p><p>Love</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember1, post: 761487, member: 23706"] You know....a lot of the adoptive parents when I first came here, none whom I think of are here now, got very upset if I suggested adoption was part of the problem. So I kind of stopped. I get this. They wanted to think that their kids were not troubled because of genetics or drugs/alcohol in utero or a lower than average IQ. God help me. I DIDNT WANT TO THINK THIS EITHER!.Those issues to me meant a lack of hope. I am a realist, not one who sees a half full or empty glass. I see what is there. I can't think that one day Kay will be able to take good care of herself and I can't even fool myself into thinking she loves us deep inside. Truthfully she actually can not live with us because she could maybe hurt us. And the only time she ever contacted us was for help or else we had to initiate the contact. Kay only "loved" us when we gave her comfort or money. I read that often our troubled kids, not all adopted but troubled, are truly not interested in a relationship with us until they need something. Is that a real parent/child relationship? No! Yet we will do all we can to keep what we have....crumbs. And I am not sorry that we tried to help her, but so much pain went into it. And she is no better. Well, I am fortunate that my connection to God is strong. I could not have done this without Him. And all of you. Love [/QUOTE]
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