Midwest Mom- Thank you so much for your suggestion. As I said before, I have no idea how these things work and welcome any suggestions and words of wisdom anyone has to offer. Cedar- I laughed when I read your post and saw all my quotes listed out. I thought, "Well, when you put it that way, I guess you are right, no wonder I am so tired. COM- Your message brought tears to my eyes after a very long, exhausting day. I never really thought about how it might just be impossible for some people to actually "get it." I am very very fortunate in that most of the people I care deeply about do get it. As for my one brother, the one who loaned me the money, he is gentle and kind and caring even when he can't quite understand it all. I can in no way complain about that. I think it is just as simple as you say, they just cannot imagine.... I am the one who keeps apologizing. He is the one who keeps saying to let it go. I will work on that. As a parent, it is very hard to let go of the sins your child has committed against others, especially when you were used even unwittingly. That is a tough one. Numerous questions remain. On a practical level, where was she if she was not working at Macys all those hours during that three year period? Where was she if she was not in school at the local university for two years? Just those two things took up a lot of her time. Then there are the cross country trips for photography gigs that never existed, the trips to southern CA to supposedly judge gymnastic competitions, and the 37 trips to * between February 2008 and June 11, 2011. Where was she and what was she doing? If she is one of those rare people who genuinely cannot feel remorse, shame or empathy, what will become of her? For without those things, how can there ever be restitution, and eventual redemption. How can anyone forgive her for all of this if she does not honestly care about what she has done? Will forgiveness come? At this point it is hard to imagine if and when forgiveness might come. I find I am not eaten up with anger and bitterness, so I am not terribly concerned about how not forgiving her would affect me. I do wonder how I can ever forgive her for constantly fueling my hopes for resolution while deliberately and simultaneously creating a chaos designed to obfuscate her ongoing theft. How can I forgive her for using me as the instrument to defraud her uncle and for forever changing my relationship with him? For encouraging her dad and me to file a lawsuit against the mortgage company based on fraudulent bank statements she herself produced? For being more than willing to see her dad and I lose our home? How do I forgive her for stealing and squandering the money left to me by the death of my hard-working parents? How do I forgive someone whose ongoing lies and deception promised resolution that was always eminent but was never going to come? She deliberately created hope based on those lies and deception and continually made promises she never had intentions of fulfilling. How does one forgive that? These are tough questions. God and I are going to have to work on that one together. Will I ever manage to get our credit repaired? Get us out of bankruptcy? After all, I was the one who sent the credit bureaus all those fake documents “proving” that all those thousands of dollars in debts were not ours. Now I have to tell them, “Ooops, forget all that. New story. Those documents were all fake and we were the victims of identity theft.” So far, they haven’t been at all anxious to work with me. If she is capable of all this, what else is she capable of? To what extremes might she go when she is finally confronted by the police? Is she a danger to herself or to others? Is she a flight risk? What can we reasonably predict and what proactive or preventive steps do we need to take? As always, more questions that answers. I guess we just wait and try to stay ahead of the game. To all of you who have posted messages, thank you so much. What a wonderful and wise group of peopple you are.