This is my first post and I'm glad to have found you. I was awakened at 1:30 in the morning 2 weeks ago hearing my son's ex-girlfriend yelling on his speaker phone "what did you take?!?!?" He took a half bottle of Advil, and laid on his floor waiting to die. Since he wrote a suicide note there was only the option of him being involuntarily committed or him signing in for a voluntary commitment. I called 911 and the ambulance took him to the ward of the hospital. 12 hours later they finally got a bed for him. He has always been a funny, yet quiet kid, my youngest (his sister is 3 years older). He made some poor decisions, more to do with money and spending it but he told the in-staff counselor he had ruined his life. He's all of 21!! He was released after a week, telling the counselor at the hospital he would follow up but he hasn't and now says he won't. He says he doesn't need help. In the meantime I'm feeling like I want to just lay around all day in a depressed mood. I have contacted a therapist because I really need someone to talk to. Depression runs in my family, but I have no problem taking medications for it; I'd rather feel alive than miserable. He won't see anyone, and refuses to even try medication. His father died from alcohol poisoning. The depression is on my side of the family. At this point he has a job and is paying for his car, I think part of the problem is he hasn't found a career, something that he could do well with. He said college wasn't for him, and that was his decision but in his note he referred to himself as the 'non-college going son, who is a big disappointment'. I've never indicated he was a disappointment, I just assumed he'd find his niche in his own time. Now he is in his room, not wanting to talk to me at all and not really caring what I think. He's not belligerent, he just says he doesn't need counseling. I'm seeing how all advice basically talks about detachment and not coddling him...its just so sad to remember how he used to be.