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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 696897" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>We adopted a kid like this age 11 too. Your son can have Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) and show affection. Its to make you trust him and think he accepts you. With his history of many homes, disruption and violece, I guarantee you he is full blown Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) even though he, and our son, did not get that diagnosis until he was finally told he had to leave and was put into a longterm lockdown in residential treatment for young sexual predators.</p><p></p><p>In our care, and much of this was done on the sneak, he killed two dogs, tried to strangle our cat and may have killed him too since one day he never came home, sexually molested our two young kids who were too terrified to tell, abused a slow, epileptic boy at school who was non verbalb(we found yhis out after he confessed when he was gone), stole from us and stores and set little fires.</p><p></p><p>The strength of our family pulled us through, but we never saw or wanted to see him again and dissolved the adoption. it was a trauma we are over, but will never forget. We were not told he was a problem and thought our love would cure him. But the truth was he didnt want our love, for all his hugs and kisses. Fake.</p><p></p><p>It did not seem fake. He was a good actor. He was always loving on us. His diagnosis in residential,after living there a long time, was severe reactive attachment disorder. Funny that his psychologist and psychitrist missed it. Hmmmmmm. We never heard that diagnosis from them while he lived with us or from his social worker beef re we agreed to bring him home and it was not in his adoption biography that we read before bringing him into our house.</p><p></p><p>The county charged him with sexual assault in the first degree because the younger kids were so much younger than him. He was convicted. Trust me, this kid never acted out sexually in front of us. We thought he was asexual. Yet he was hurting the children in our house and never got caught. Until he did get caught, three years later at 13. Goodbye to him. Thats when we found out that HE had killed our pets. Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) kids are wonderful foolers. The bottomnline is they may fake remorse but they dont have empathy. They dont have a conscience.</p><p></p><p>My advice is to never leave him alone with any younger children, put alarms on his bedroom door do he can't leave his room at night and do damage (you escort him to bathroom), rehome all pets because you already caught him trying to harm the dog...this will continue, and think hard about whether you want to really do this.</p><p></p><p>Good luck. You are going to need it. You may be stronger than us. We were ready to strangle him when we found out what he'd done. He could never come back. I think CPS felt sorry for us. They offered awesome services that helped us heal.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 696897, member: 1550"] We adopted a kid like this age 11 too. Your son can have Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) and show affection. Its to make you trust him and think he accepts you. With his history of many homes, disruption and violece, I guarantee you he is full blown Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) even though he, and our son, did not get that diagnosis until he was finally told he had to leave and was put into a longterm lockdown in residential treatment for young sexual predators. In our care, and much of this was done on the sneak, he killed two dogs, tried to strangle our cat and may have killed him too since one day he never came home, sexually molested our two young kids who were too terrified to tell, abused a slow, epileptic boy at school who was non verbalb(we found yhis out after he confessed when he was gone), stole from us and stores and set little fires. The strength of our family pulled us through, but we never saw or wanted to see him again and dissolved the adoption. it was a trauma we are over, but will never forget. We were not told he was a problem and thought our love would cure him. But the truth was he didnt want our love, for all his hugs and kisses. Fake. It did not seem fake. He was a good actor. He was always loving on us. His diagnosis in residential,after living there a long time, was severe reactive attachment disorder. Funny that his psychologist and psychitrist missed it. Hmmmmmm. We never heard that diagnosis from them while he lived with us or from his social worker beef re we agreed to bring him home and it was not in his adoption biography that we read before bringing him into our house. The county charged him with sexual assault in the first degree because the younger kids were so much younger than him. He was convicted. Trust me, this kid never acted out sexually in front of us. We thought he was asexual. Yet he was hurting the children in our house and never got caught. Until he did get caught, three years later at 13. Goodbye to him. Thats when we found out that HE had killed our pets. Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) kids are wonderful foolers. The bottomnline is they may fake remorse but they dont have empathy. They dont have a conscience. My advice is to never leave him alone with any younger children, put alarms on his bedroom door do he can't leave his room at night and do damage (you escort him to bathroom), rehome all pets because you already caught him trying to harm the dog...this will continue, and think hard about whether you want to really do this. Good luck. You are going to need it. You may be stronger than us. We were ready to strangle him when we found out what he'd done. He could never come back. I think CPS felt sorry for us. They offered awesome services that helped us heal. [/QUOTE]
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