Afraid of your child?

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by comatheart, Apr 3, 2011.

  1. comatheart

    comatheart Guest

    I'm so frustrated.

    difficult child has been taking Zoloft and Abilify for several months now. He seemed to do well for about 2 months and then he became pretty depressed again. The psychiatrist raised the Zoloft and here we are a couple weeks later with hypo mania symptoms. When he is at the top of his "rollercoaster" (as we call it) he does stupid things. We've been keeping track and it's clear as day.....he does lttle things like talking really fast, skipping around the house, signing loudly inappropriately (he is normally not a signer!) giddy behavior to BIG things like shoplifting, skipping school, doing drugs and attempting to hurt his siblings. He doesn't think of consequences at all when he's at the top of his roller-coaster, he doesn't care.

    At our recent psychiatrist appointment he sat and described his life as going well. He minimizes everything and tells the doctor what he wants to hear. Then the doctor turns to me to check in and I explain how he's currently at the top of his rollercoaster and has been skipping classes at school and lying. He has been suspended from school. All of his grades have dropped. He is stealing again and otherwise doesn't give a flying flip about anyone or anything besides himself. I questioned the medications, I don't think they are working to control the mood swings and wondered if if were possible that we need to try something different. He only does the bad things when at the top of the rollercoaster. The doctor did not agree and was hesitant to raise the Abilify, but he did. He said it is all behavioral and he is a teenage boy and that we need to seek Counseling. UGH!! difficult child was in counseling for over a year before we even considered medicating him. I don't see how counseling can help someone who is a compulsive liar. We spent $$$$ paying for him to sit there and manipulate and lie to the guy. So psychiatrist turns to difficult child and asks if he felt comfortable with the counselor. difficult child shakes his head NO. :grrr: ARRRGH! We took him to 3 counselors before we found the one he liked. Never ONCE did he tell us he wasn't comfortable with him. In fact, just the opposite, he really liked him. Unfortunately, there's only so much the counselor could do with difficult child since he would never talk and when he did, it was lies upon lies. ETA: I know my son needs to continue counseling, I'm just frustrated that the psychiatrist doesn't seem to be listening to our major concerns and so easily wants to dismiss them to a counselor when we've already been down that road. :(

    Finally, difficult child is really scaring me. You may remember me posting about how he chopped up prescription medications to give to his unsuspecting brother "as a joke"? Well we are seeing other frightening things too. Last week he was messing with the youngest brother and choked him out. My husband heard commotion in the other room and found difficult child with his hands around his brothers neck. Our youngest could not breath and began choking and gagging when difficult child was forced to let go. This episode did not occur during a fight, difficult child was happy as a clam and still to this day doesn't seem to think it was a big deal.

    Then a few days ago we were all sitting at the dinner table eating when our new puppy began yelping out in pain. Everyone rushed into the living room to see what the problem was- well everyone besides difficult child. He sat there and continued to eat his dinner without a care in the world. Who does that when a person or animal is crying out in pain!?!?

    I feel like no one is listening to us and our concerns regarding difficult child and I'm afraid. Who do we turn to that will listen and take our concerns seriously before difficult child does something to harm himself or someone else??
  2. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    I think I'd have had him transported to a psychiatric hospital at that point for the safety of everyone else.
  3. Star*

    Star* call 911

    Hi and welcome -

    I can't tell you anyone's experiences other than mine and my sons. I'm also not trying to alarm you at all, but Zoloft made myself and my son suicidal. It has been known in some children to make them increasingly depressed and aggressive. With myself it didn't make me aggressive, it just made me have the idealology of suicide (I enjoyed planning out my suicide) but knew better than to carry it out. With my son -he tried twice to hang himself. Once at age 10, and again at age 16 when another psychiatrist put him on it without my knowledge when he was incarcerated at Department of Juvenile Justice.

    I would do a little research and reading about Zoloft and have a talk with your psychiatrist about this. Ask him if he feels a change in his AD's would be beneficial. Do know this however - the medicines while helpful do NOT change the person, they're more like a bandaid or a support to help your child cope, so a lot of the aggressive behavior IS your son coming to the surface. What will help the most is therapy, long and continued therapy with the right therapist. If this therapist doesn't feel he's a good match? Ask him to refer you to another that may be a better match.

  4. Star*

    Star* call 911

    I also agree with Haozi's assessment -

    When your son becomes a danger to self and others? This is a criteria for taking him to the ER. HOWEVER - do NOT be surprised if they don't admit him to the child's psychiatric ward on just this incident. The child welfare case worker from mental health will be looking to you and your husband for patterns of consistant dangerous physical aggression from your son to himself and other family members and pets, or friends. If you are not able to substantiate this? More than likely they will send him home, make a record of it - and refer him to his regular psychiatrist. If he flips out in the waiting room because he is OBVIOUSLY aggitated - there may be a chance that they keep him for observation - but depending on your insurance? It's usually not more than 72 hours and then their staff psychiatrist will concur with your regular psychiatrist.

    Just trying to prepare you for the what may be. If you are successful with an inpatient stay? Tell them about times, dates, and by all means keep a diary from now on of his behaviors. It will be invaluable to you and any other doctors later on. It could show them a cycle of behavior or show clues to when or why things are happening. Also any and all medication doses by times and dates. Keeping good records will be crucial to his psychiatrists.
  5. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I agree with ER. I would also want him weaned off the Zoloft. The can cause violence to get worse and I have no understanding as to why SSRIs are prescribed to children except after perhaps a suicide attempt IF they are not violent to others...even then, I have tried many antidepressants myself and some just plain gave me a terrible response. I finally found one that changed my life for the better, but it took ten years!!!

    Hurting people and animals is a HUGE red flag for very serious problems. Is he your biological child? Any serious psychiatric issues on either side of his family tree? Any substance abuse? This child tried to harm both his siblings AND an animal. I would not allow him to be alone at any time. At night I would put in an alarm on his bedroom door so that if he leaves his room, it wakes you up and you can watch him. He is not safe and you can not trust him right now.

    Hugs and good luck!
  6. rlsnights

    rlsnights New Member

    psychiatric hospital absolutely warranted by the incident you describe.

    If you haven't already done it you absolutely, I mean right now, don't read any more posts, go through your house and lock up every prescription and OTC medication you have everywhere including your bedroom, bathroom, anywhere. Even if you only lock them in a tacklebox and hide it in your closet that is better than having him have free access to deadly medications. And Tylenol can kill you or kill your liver which is the same thing so don't think the OTC medications are "safe".

    If you think I am exaggerating I will tell you that my sister was in a coma for 6 days after taking a bottle full of blood pressure medications at age 14. Yes it's inconvenient. But if your child is seriously injured or dies because you failed to do this - you do not want to go there.

    Then you need to secure all the deadly poisons like household and garage cleaners. Spray cans (anything) should be locked up. I was recently educated about the risks of things like cans of computer air spray and those are now all locked up in our house. That stuff is truly deadly very fast - freezes the lungs. We put it all in our garage and installed double deadbolts and we keep the keys and control access.

    I would be getting a 2nd opinion from a child psychiatrist so fast your head would spin. Exact same thing with my kiddo was early onset bipolar kindled by antidepressants.

    And you need a safety plan including instructions to the other kids on what to do if their sib attacks them or tries to give them something odd to eat or drink. I cannot stress enough that this behavior should not be ignored or dismissed as "just behavioral". If you told the current psychiatrist about these incidents and he dismissed them I would be seriously considering reporting him for professional misconduct. And I would never let him treat one of my children again.

    Sorry but I have been through some things I will not tell you about at the hands of an incompetent psychiatrist and I wish I had had someone to tell me what I just told you when my son (and our family) was being destroyed by a psychiatrist who wouldn't listen to us.

  7. shellyd67

    shellyd67 Active Member

    I agree with the other responses. Patricia, you are 100 % on the money with locking up medications and harmful chemicals ... When I see articles online or in the news about kids selling their stimulants and other household medications, I begin to fume ...
  8. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    Definitely psychiatric hospital. The psychiatrist there may be more willing to listen to you. I'm shocked that with those mood swings that he isn't on a first line mood stabilizer.
  9. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    I'm chiming in here to agree. Anything dangerous? LOCK. IT. UP. Regular bedroom door locks are easy to get past. A small digital safe is $30 at Harbor Freight.

    And then make sure you USE the locks... Trust me.
  10. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Haley, I agree with the others. Clearly, these are NOT the medications for your son. He needs to be taken off of them in a hospital setting. That will be a great way to change over to a new dr, too. They will ask you if you have a psychiatrist and you can say you are not happy with him and need a referral.
    Best of luck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  11. wheres the light?

    wheres the light? New Member

    I have four kids as well, wow I just found this site and my 14 year old daughter sounds the same I can't believe it, WOW. She was diagnosed with ADHD when she was 7 and now has just been released from the hospital for self harm etc and was diagnosed with Conduct Disorder. She is out of control,lies,minimizes everything, tell the dr's what they want to hear, cutting, she loves to drink and I found out she smokes weed, LIAR lies on top of lies, doesnt hide or even care to hide her behavior, huge mood swings, impulsive,fighting, suspended 5x this year, grades are so bad they could not grade her, she is just there for the social aspect, she has choked out her sister as well last year and thought nothing of it, sticks her foot out while her younger brothers are running, when asked why would you do that she replies with " I didn't do that", she argues about everything, has no guilt or remorse NONE! and sooooooooooooo much more. I'm losing hope as the Dr's said there is no medications for conduct disorder. I'm very afraid of her as i don't know what to expect day to day. Things are getting worse, and I feel I have lost hope and see no light. :(